Archive
Where were you conceived?
Posted 5:38pm Sunday 25th July 2021 by Critic
You can tell a lot about a person based on where they cum from. Go through these questions and select as many answers as you feel apply to you, and then total the score. For example, if answers 1, 2, and 4 applied to you, you’d score 7 for that question. Get out your calculator, and Read more...
A pai mai ki te mārama, Bring it into the light: Approaching the taboo of sex in Pasifika cultures
Posted 5:34pm Sunday 25th July 2021 by Susana Jones
“Kissy kissy, huggy huggy, but no fucky fucky.” My strong, brown mum’s words echo through the empty depths of my brain as she sends me off to Dunedin from Auckland at the prime age of 17. For all I can remember, this is the complete extent of my at-home education about sex, Read more...
I Tried Retro Cosmopolitan Sex Tips So You Don’t Have To
Posted 5:31pm Sunday 25th July 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
If there is one thing that all students can universally agree on, it’s that sex is one of life’s greatest pleasures and priorities. Sex can be fun and exciting, or icky and underwhelming. One source of information which has always offered a wide range of sex advice is the sex tips column Read more...
Wrapping Up the History of Condoms
Posted 5:22pm Sunday 25th July 2021 by Sean Gourley
Condoms could be a lot worse. The colourful history of humans trying to find a way to have sex without consequences highlights how appreciative we should be of current advances in technology, which have allowed us to have sex without dipping our penises in tar. It really makes you Read more...
Local Produce: Alex Dykes
Posted 4:28pm Sunday 18th July 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Singer-songwriter Alex Dykes is loud, full of life, and new to the Dunedin music scene. His upcoming album, The Dunedin Study, is set to be released this summer. Critic sat down to chat with Alex on his upcoming projects, his time at Otago, and his creative process. Alex started playing Read more...
Recycle A Device: Otago students are running one of New Zealand’s raddest social enterprises
Posted 4:23pm Sunday 18th July 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
If there is one thing every student has, it’s an old laptop or phone collecting dust in a drawer. Maybe you just don’t know what to do with it, or the thought of recycling it seems like too much admin, or maybe you’re hoping one day your old device will suddenly come back to life. Read more...
OPINION: Middle Aged Drunks Are the Problem, Not Students
Posted 4:21pm Sunday 18th July 2021 by Asia Martusia King
There’s a rugby match tonight. Shona’s left Xavier with a babysitter, and she’s going fucking rogue. For one night and one night only, her pent-up midlife chaos will be free. Her husband, Murray, is also gearing up for the game. Murray and his corporate buddies will indulge in too Read more...
Hot Chicken & Spicy Bants with Ocean Alley’s Mitch Galbraith
Posted 4:19pm Sunday 18th July 2021 by Elliot Weir
Aussie psychedelic rock band Ocean Alley have jammed their way into our playlists, festivals, and hearts in recent years with hit singles like ‘Confidence’ and ‘The Comedown’. In light of their upcoming tour across Aotearoa, guitarist Mitch Galbraith sat down with Critic Te Read more...
Kiribati Language Week
Posted 4:17pm Sunday 18th July 2021 by Susana Jones
Mauri everyone! Kiribati language week was from Sunday 11 July to Saturday 17 July, and is a time to celebrate and engage with the language of our Pacific neighbours. (We’re a week late, but still committed to bringing you this celebration of Kiribati language). Kiribati is a three Read more...
The Great Annual Critic Bar Review: Part 2
Posted 4:15pm Sunday 18th July 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
We’ve established that it is impossible to agree on the best bar. But here a washed-up fourth year with an alcohol problem continues to assess the general vibes of our most iconic drinking spots. This is Part Two of the controversial Great Annual Critic Bar Review. (If you think everything Read more...
The Great Annual Critic Bar Review: Part 1
Posted 1:27pm Tuesday 13th July 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
In this issue, we begin a review of all the bars in Dunedin assessing the general vibes with some first-hand experiences. Until we put together a scientific ranking, who better to review our bars than myself, a washed up fourth-year with a mild drinking problem? Dunedin Social Club Going Read more...
The Cultural Phenomenon That Is Dunedin Shitposting
Posted 1:23pm Tuesday 13th July 2021 by Daniel Fitzpatrick
Ah, shitposting. Nothing compares to opening Facebook and seeing a low quality attempt at humour brightening up your newsfeed. Dunedin is fortunate to be home to a number of shitposting pages, each varying in size, audience, genre, and quality. Some of Dunedin’s most iconic Read more...
Reading Croak: A Book of Fun for Frog Lovers and Remembering Phil Bishop
Posted 1:21pm Tuesday 13th July 2021 by Asia Martusia King
Croak is a “book of fun for frog lovers”, compiled by Phil Bishop and published by Exisle. Phil was a beloved Zoology Professor at Otago, the Co-Chair of the International Union for Conservation of Nature’s Species Survival Commission Amphibian Specialist Group, and the Chief Read more...
Aquanauts: Diving has never looked so good
Posted 2:31pm Friday 11th June 2021 by Erin Gourley
From 11 June to 20 June, the Screaming Rooster will play host to something a bit different. Aquanauts, a pop-up art exhibition about the history of diving, has been set up by eight Communication Design students from Otago Polytech. Rosa Nevison, Hanna Anstiss, Emily Bell, Emily Montgomery, Read more...
Samoan Language Week: Time to Learn About Samoa
Posted 7:55pm Sunday 30th May 2021 by Susana Jones
Talofa lava you beautiful things. This week, from Sunday 30 May to Saturday 5 June, it’s Samoan language week. To learn more about Samoan culture and the importance of our Pacific neighbours, I caught up with Fa’ataumamatemalesoatau, a Samoan student at the Polytech and a cultural rep on Read more...
Music Venues of Dunedin: Reviewed
Posted 7:52pm Sunday 30th May 2021 by Barney Connolly
Dunedin venues have slowly been disappearing thanks to the boomer-fearing bureaucrats who run this city. There is current controversy surrounding these venues and noise control and it’s now more important than ever to support our local venues and musicians. So here you have it, a definitive Read more...
TRAMP STAMPS: TRASHY OR ICONIC?
Posted 7:43pm Sunday 30th May 2021 by Molly Willis
Love them or hate them, lower back tattoos are back. But is there a justified reason for the ink’s bad reputation, or is it just good old-fashioned sexism? Worn by the biggest and best icons of the 2000s – Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and Kate Moss to name a few Read more...
No Redemption for Sunk Pong Star
Posted 7:33pm Sunday 30th May 2021 by Fox Meyer
Once on top of the world, beer pong star Barry BonGlover has had quite the fall from grace. Ever since a manicure-gone-wrong rendered both of his hands useless, Barry has gone through alcoholism, jail, and divorce. And we were there for all of it! Let’s take a look back at some of his greatest Read more...
Goop on a Budget
Posted 6:47pm Sunday 30th May 2021 by Erin Gourley
Disclaimer: Do not follow any of these recommendations. Please. Accredited health guru Gwyneth Paltrow has realised that Goop, her alternative lifestyle brand, isn’t accessible to people on a budget. What a shock! She advertises things like gold-plated vibrators for the low, low price Read more...
Local Produce: Man Ray
Posted 12:45am Monday 24th May 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Named after the famous surrealist photographer and the Spongebob villain, Man Ray is one of Dunedin’s newest live bands. Man Ray sat down with Critic to talk about what it’s like gigging around Dunedin, the process of creating music, and their goal to create safe spaces for everyone Read more...
Period Pain: The best drugs for combatting that time of the month
Posted 12:42am Monday 24th May 2021 by Runze Liu
Period pains, medically referred to as dysmenorrhoea, are annoyingly painful and are an all too real struggle for people who menstruate. Here is a guide to combatting those cramps. But remember, always read the label, not all products work and if you’re concerned, consult your health care Read more...
I Miss The Fun Facts on Libra Pads
Posted 12:38am Monday 24th May 2021 by Asia Martusia King
If you’ve ever menstruated before the year 2021, you might remember sharting bloody chunks into the toilet while learning that oysters are ambisexual. Libra pads used to have fun facts on the inner packaging called Odd Spots. I recently decided to buy them for the first time in yonks, Read more...
Tag yourself: Menstrual Brands
Posted 12:36am Monday 24th May 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Libra The popular one in the group Spends all their money at Glassons Only drinks vodka RTDs Wears Nike Air Force Ones everywhere U by Kotex Will help you out with an assignment last minute Outfit repeater Is everybody’s friend Only Read more...
Mad Lib: How Does Menstruation Work?
Posted 12:33am Monday 24th May 2021 by Fox Meyer
Ask a friend for words to fill in the blanks. No matter how much you fuck it up, you’ll still receive a better menstrual education than anyone born before 1970. Menstruation is the regular discharge of (LIQUID) and (NOUN) from the inner lining of the uterus through the vagina. It Read more...
What do MEN know about MENstruation?
Posted 12:01am Monday 24th May 2021 by Fox Meyer
Men don’t talk much about periods. Some think women wear tampons all the time “just in case”. Most think the pad sticks to the inside of your thighs. The idea of talking about periods seems to make men instantly flustered. We took to the streets and designed a little competition. Read more...
Mythbustin’ Menstruation Myths
Posted 11:51pm Sunday 23rd May 2021 by Susana Jones
Menstruation myths have been around for yonks. The term menstruation originates from the Greek words men and menus, with men meaning month and menus meaning moon and power. Menstruation has always been symbolically tied to power, both good and bad. It’s not surprising then, that many a myth Read more...
Local Produce: Sam Charlesworth: A Bedroom Is All You Need
Posted 4:58pm Sunday 16th May 2021 by Sean Gourley
Sam Charlesworth is a fresher studying Studio Production, Marine Science, and Te Reo Māori here at Otago. With just “a few mics and an interface,” he has recorded a huge amount of music and has recently started playing gigs around Dunedin. Sam records all of his songs without Read more...
“You feel that instant connection”
Posted 4:30pm Sunday 16th May 2021 by Elliot Weir
Kiwi artist Mark Perkins, known by his stage name ‘Merk’, has made a name for himself in recent years releasing two successful albums to critical acclaim. Critic Te Arohi spoke to Merk about his most recent album, Infinite Youth, which came out in February of this year. Merk has been Read more...
What’s the Deal With Dunedin, Florida?
Posted 4:28pm Sunday 16th May 2021 by Alex Leckie-Zaharic
If you’re on Facebook or part of Dunedin News, chances are you’ve come across Dunedin, Florida. Every now and again on Dunedin News, boomers will post things like “I don’t know how I ended up in this group, I’m looking for Dunedin, Florida.” It is then accompanied Read more...
What RTD Are You?
Posted 4:26pm Sunday 16th May 2021 by Alex Leckie-Zaharic
Question One: Best place to buy booze? Liquorland SuperLiquor New World Centre City Henry’s Big Barrel Question Two: What’s the best budget pizza? Pepperoni Hawaiian Beef and Onion Vege trio Cheesy Garlic Question Read more...
Behind the Scenes: The cast and crew of Capping Show tell all
Posted 4:24pm Sunday 16th May 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
The annual Otago Capping Show is back for its 127th year, with shows running from May 13 to May 21. Critic sat down to chat with some of the cast and crew to talk about what went into creating this year's performance and everything in between. Actor Lucy, Video Director Alex and Stage Read more...
Behind the Scenes: The cast and crew of Capping Show tell all
Posted 2:54pm Thursday 13th May 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
The annual Otago Capping Show is back for its 127th year, with shows running from May 13 to May 21. Critic sat down to chat with some of the cast and crew to talk about what went into creating this year's performance and everything in between. Actor Lucy, video director Alex and stage Read more...
University Conspiracy Theories: Fact or Fiction?
Posted 4:07pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Critic
1.Bill and Bill are holograms 2.There is a specialist Ghostbusters division of Campus Watch, which is why there have been no ghosts on campus since 2007 3.Archway looks fucked because it’s a UFO that crashed into campus, and the government covered it up by inventing brutalist Read more...
Local Produce: Jess Clarke and Just Friends Jewellery
Posted 4:05pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Jess Clarke is a history and performing arts student who produces all kinds of weird and wonderful earrings. Finding success at the Radio One Market days, she has managed to turn her summer holiday hobby into one of Otago’s newest trends. Jess’s work features all kinds of Read more...
Rotuman Language Week: Time To Learn About Rotuma
Posted 3:59pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Susana Jones
Noa’ia (hello), baddies! This week, from Sunday 9 May to Saturday 15 May, is Rotuman language week. Some of y’all might be thinking, “what the heck and where the heck is Rotuma?” Read on rockstars. Rotuma is a group of volcanic islands, made up of Rotuma Island and nearby Read more...
The Titanic Never Sunk
Posted 3:53pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Fox Meyer
I don't know about you, but I've never met anyone who was on the Titanic when it sunk. Strike one. Do they really expect us to believe that “the unsinkable ship”, effectively a spaceship, really sank on its maiden voyage? The whole thing smells fishy, and I’m about to Read more...
What Conspiracy Theory Are You?
Posted 3:51pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Elliot Weir
1 - What is your favourite Wii Sports sport? a. Bowling b. Read more...
WARNING: In 20 Years, There Will Be Crime
Posted 3:47pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Asia Martusia King
The 1960s were a beautiful time. They gave us tie-dye, ketamine, hippies, the Manson Family, and the beginning of an unusually violent global crime pandemic. I don’t mean to alarm you, but it could happen again. And it’s going to happen in Waikouaiti and Karitane. Let me Read more...
NZ CRYPTIDS: Which would be the best to live with?
Posted 3:42pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Asia Martusia King
Flatting is expensive, and finding a good flatmate can be tricky. With environmental destruction plowing through the nation, many elusive figures of the wilderness have decided to hang up the spooky hat and make tracks into town. Some want degrees, some just want the ladies, but all are moving to Read more...
Aotearoa’s Conspiracy Pages Are a Cesspit
Posted 3:38pm Sunday 9th May 2021 by Erin Gourley
I went into this expecting to find some wild and quirky conspiracy theories. I found some. But it took a lot of trawling through the same racist shit to get there. New Zealand’s conspiracy scene is warped, hateful, and absurdly ignorant. 1080 eyewitness. This group is fucking huge Read more...
The Mums of Dunedin Help Me Define Mumcore
Posted 8:51pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Asia Martusia King
You’re eight years old in the back seat of mum’s station wagon. She’s taking you to touch rugby practice and lovingly chain smoking in the front because it’s still legal in the early 2000s. “BUSTER, BUSTER, BUSTER,” you yell at your Nintendog. Buster can’t Read more...
Horoscope
Posted 7:55pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Critic
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 People might not always be there for you, but gear will be. Dunedin band to listen to: Straightjacket Fits Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 Time to put your head into your books instead of giving it. Dunedin band to listen to: Juno Read more...
Local Produce: André Theis, Putting the Stud in Studio
Posted 7:50pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Sean Gourley
André Theis is a local producer, working from a studio in his North Dunedin basement. He spends his days recording, mixing and mastering full-time with an ever expanding list of local artists. André started the studio as a Uni student, first making music out of his flat bedroom. Read more...
What MicroGenre Are You?
Posted 7:43pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
1 - What Radio station do you most identify with? a. I’m more of a podcast person b. ZM or The Read more...
Every Eurovision Entry, Ranked
Posted 7:36pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Fox Meyer
39 countries submitted a music video. Critic has never paid attention to Eurovision, but now that Australia is involved for some fucking reason, we had to. We ranked all the videos ahead of the 22 May finale across three categories: Head-boppiness, performance on-screen, and general vibe. Then we Read more...
Mosh Etiquette 101
Posted 6:47pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Rutene Rickard
While moshes can seem like animalistic anarchy, there is a crucial code of conduct that keeps all participants safe in their gnarly sonic and sweaty adventures. Moshing, which started up during the ‘80s with the rise of punk and hardcore, is now a widespread concert activity. The original Read more...
The History of the Dunedin Sound: A nostalgic look back on the birth of the Dunedin music scene
Posted 6:42pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
The Dunedin Sound is one of New Zealand’s best known music scenes. The cold, dreary and quirky city that we call home has produced some of New Zealand's most notable songwriters and musicians. Much of their work still influences Dunedin musicians today, and is responsible for our unique Read more...
The Rise of Dunedin’s Drum and Bass
Posted 6:36pm Sunday 2nd May 2021 by Runze Liu
Drum and Bass music is a major part of Dunedin life. It is the soundtrack to the Otago experience. But what will its future be? Critic sat down with some of Dunedin’s very own DJs to uncover the evolution of DnB. Bando is a bedroom DJ, a hobbyist who practises at home but doesn’t Read more...
How to Avoid Killing Your Herbs: When, Where, How, and What to Grow
Posted 9:06pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Elliot Weir
If you expected another article about growing weed, you will be sorely disappointed. This is all about literal herbs. When? Herbs don’t benefit from space heaters and alcohol blankets, so planting at the right time is the key to making sure your herbs survive the winter. Right now is Read more...
What Dunedin Street Litter Are You?
Posted 6:34pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Fox Meyer
A single sock. Ciggie butts. The natural landscape of Dunedin is rich with treasures. They say “you are what you eat,” but also “you are what you throw away.” Bins overflowing with torn black rubbish bags. Noodles, spilled like entrails from a corpse. Bits of rubber and Read more...
Pussy Galore: A Conversation with Cat Rescue Dunedin
Posted 6:00pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Erin Gourley
You might think you love pussy, but Cat Rescue Dunedin love pussy more than you. Critic sat down with Amber Coste, President of CatS (Cat Rescue Dunedin Student Association) and committee member of Cat Rescue Dunedin Charitable Trust, to talk about cats and how students can get involved with the new Read more...
University Courses If They Were Animal Crossing Villagers
Posted 5:45pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Oscar Paul
Nintendo’s Animal Crossing the perfect escape tool from the cruel reality of Covid, Uni stress, depression, the housing market and the loss of Harlene. It’s also a genuinely fun game to play. Each game hosts cute wee villagers, which are anthropomorphic animals. For you commerce students Read more...
A Critical Analysis: Why I Hate Barbie in My Scene Barbie Jammin’ In Jamaica (2004)
Posted 5:32pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Asia Martusia King
Barbie’s a feminist icon. She’s an astrophysicist. A business executive. A police officer. George Washington, somehow. A paratrooper (“United States Marine Corps Sergeant Barbie”, 1991). She’s also a toxic backstabbing manipulator with a victim Read more...
The Guide to being the Ultimate Fresher: the tips and tricks for getting through uni
Posted 3:52pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
This guide here goes out to all my freshers who have just begun their journey at the University of Otago. I get it, you’re probably feeling nervous, excited, and slightly panicked about the prospect of spending the next few years of your life in this freezing cold, chlamydia infested hole at Read more...
Local Produce: Night Lunch
Posted 3:45pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Sean Gourley
Night Lunch are a Dunedin duo of Liams made famous by the smash hit music video for their song House Full of Shit. The band features the uniquely minimalist combo of Liam Hoffman on drums and Liam Clune on a home-made instrument called a diddly bow. Hoffman has finished Uni but Clune has come back Read more...
Renters United: Fighting for a Fair Deal for Renters
Posted 3:26pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Elliot Weir
Abusive landlords, privacy breaches, and runaway rent prices are the bread to the butter that is Renters United. The only thing worse than landlords are the structural conditions that created them. Look, I get it, not everyone wants to own their own house at whatever point they’re at in Read more...
Local Produce: Scott Tisdall Is Making Potatoes Instafamous
Posted 1:20am Monday 19th April 2021 by Sean Gourley
Scott Tisdall is an Otago student who moonlights growing moonlight potatoes on his family farm. Using Instagram as a platform, he is gradually expanding his operation to bring locally grown potatoes to the tables of starving students. Last season, he gave 33% of his profits to the cancer society. We Read more...
The Breatha Diet: a vape a day keeps the doctor away
Posted 12:59am Monday 19th April 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
There is quite possibly no creature as great, and as wild, as the Otago breatha. They can often be seen vaping, drinking, and sending pesky “you up x” texts at ungodly hours. How do breathas maintain such a lifestyle? What on earth could they possibly be fuelling their bodies Read more...
OPINION: Make Dunedin More Walkable
Posted 12:51am Monday 19th April 2021 by Elliot Weir
Dunedin was largely planned out by settlers that were probably way too deep on Scotch and Irn-Bru. In that state, they thought that a street with a 35% incline would be a funny meme. They literally tried to superimpose Edinburgh onto the Otago landscape, stubbornly ignoring all of the hills that Read more...
A Review of Lee Vandervis’s Book
Posted 12:38am Monday 19th April 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
DCC Councillor Lee Vandervis has recently released a “book” (his words). The full title is The Hitch-hikers Guide to the Mayoralty Part 1: Invaluable for understanding the DCC and reading between the lines of local print-media monopoly. The title is only a fraction of this truly bizarre Read more...
Community Law: Where Otago law students do something useful for once
Posted 12:27am Monday 19th April 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Sometimes as students we find ourselves in sticky, stressful situations. Whether it's tenancy troubles, uncertainty about contracts, or a dispute with an employer, we can sometimes feel out of our depth and unsure about where to go. Luckily, Community Law Otago can assist with all of Read more...
Some Astrology Bullshit About Chlöe Swarbrick
Posted 12:18am Monday 19th April 2021 by Asia Martusia King
Jacinda Arden wouldn’t give me her birth time. But I figured that if any other politician had a CoStar it would be Chlöe Swarbrick, because she’s queer and vegan. I was wrong. Thankfully she’s a gem, and texted her mum for me. Chlöe schlorped into this world on 26th Read more...
Power Ranking the Dunedin News Splinter Groups
Posted 11:57pm Sunday 18th April 2021 by Erin Gourley
Dunedin News, the original news group for Dunedinites, is infamous for its (il)liberal “you will be kicked out if the admin does not like you” policy. There is a strict list of offences that will get you kicked out, all of which are broadly interpreted by Daryl Taylor, the page’s Read more...
Local Produce: Paddy Patterns
Posted 12:40am Sunday 11th April 2021 by Susana Jones
Paddy Patterns are just a pair of gals who make the loveliest handmade clothes (mostly tops) from funky, retro, preloved materials. Emily and Allie, both students at Otago, are the big brains behind Paddy Patterns. “We’ve been friends since year seven. We started making some very Read more...
The Critic Mid-Sem Haiku Competition
Posted 12:30am Sunday 11th April 2021 by Critic
Nothing screams Easter like a haiku competition. We asked you to send in haikus and you did, in moderate numbers, so thanks. While only the top 20 could be published and only the top 5 get tote bags, we were in equal parts inspired and depressed by all of them. If you wrote one of the poems in the Read more...
Let Us Live: Ōtepoti and the world need to address gender-based violence
Posted 12:21am Sunday 11th April 2021 by Eileen Corcoran
TW: sexual assault, harassment, femicide. Sarah Everard followed all the rules women are taught from birth. She spoke to her boyfriend as she walked through a park home at 9pm on a Wednesday, she wore comfortable and warm clothes, and shoes made for running. Still, it didn’t save her. She Read more...
Generation Hero: How Gen Zero are taking on climate change
Posted 5:35pm Sunday 28th March 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Climate change is a scary subject. As concern has grown, so has the number of environmental organisations and people willing to take on the challenge of our generation. One of these organisations is Generation Zero, a non-partisan group which focuses on a solutions-based approach to climate Read more...
Stoner’s AI Creation Sounds Like Adorable Children’s TV Show
Posted 5:31pm Sunday 28th March 2021 by Denzel Chung
Maybe it was an internet rabbit hole, where at 3am on Tuesday morning you stumbled on a video of an M&M serenading you with a Japanese ballad. Maybe it was Kim Jong-Un singing “Witch Doctor”. Or maybe, if you are actively involved in Dunedin News (i.e. over 50), you saw mayor Aaron Read more...
The Slinks: Kings of Flat Parties
Posted 5:24pm Sunday 28th March 2021 by Sean Gourley
The Slinks are an up and coming band on the Dunedin scene. Starting out in 2019, they’ve worked their way up from playing at the humble Crown Hotel to playing gigs as far out of town as Queenstown. They have two EPs out on Spotify: The Slinks and Come On Now. We checked in with them to see Read more...
New Vegan Food Box Just Dropped
Posted 5:18pm Sunday 28th March 2021 by Fox Meyer
Let me tell you that this box fucking slaps. Taste Nature is an organic food store (and much more) located by the casino. It’s a bit out of the way for your average student, but that’s okay, because the people who may be interested in an organic, plant-based meal box are the same Read more...
The Cycle of Agua: How to recycle your cooking water and save the planet
Posted 5:07pm Sunday 28th March 2021 by Susana Jones
Water. Everyone’s favourite health food. We know and love it, and most of us should probably be drinking more of it. Sure, 70% of the Earth is covered in water, and with global warming being today’s hottest topic, sometimes it seems like we are being engulfed by water. But that drip-drip Read more...
The Pain of Endometriosis
Posted 5:00pm Sunday 28th March 2021 by Alice Taylor
Endometriosis can be summed up in one word: pain. Endometriosis is a chronic condition that affects one in ten women. It occurs when tissue similar to the lining of the uterus grows outside the uterus. You can only be officially diagnosed through a laparoscopic surgery under general anesthetic. Read more...
Your Indie Movie Beach Parties Are Killing Baby Penguins
Posted 4:56pm Sunday 28th March 2021 by Asia Martusia King
At a cave in Long Beach, a group of students are having a party. They sip on ciders around a campfire, laughing gleefully while the sunset dips over the horizon. Tongue Tied by Grouplove is inexplicably playing. A white man with dreadlocks is strumming the one song he knows on ukulele. I dunno, no Read more...
The Pros and Cons of Different Methods of Consuming Drugs
Posted 3:05pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Runze Liu
Warning: Drugs can cause harm. This guide does not substitute medical advice. If you think you or someone is in danger from drugs, call 111. Whether you’re just lighting up a joint with your flatmate or you’re about to rail some lines of coke in an R-rated comedy trilogy about a Read more...
Trial by Zentech: A Story of Blood, Piss and Prostate
Posted 3:02pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Fox Meyer
This is a true story. It has been edited for clarity, but all of the content you’re about to read came straight from the mouth of an anonymous student using the pseudonym “Dusty”. The drug I tested in 2018 was a prostate anti-inflammatory. Possible side effects included Read more...
Which Antidepressant Are You?
Posted 2:54pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
1. What is your preferred method of escapism? a. Online shopping (1) b. Poetry Read more...
Local Produce: Judah Kelly
Posted 1:35pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Fox Meyer
Dunedin-raised Judah Kelley believes that building your own power and voice is important, and that music is a way to share that message with anyone who wants to listen. “It’s a better message to send than just another sad song,” she said. She continues to be a local crowd-pleaser, Read more...
Fantastic Drugs and Where to Find Them
Posted 1:27pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Elliot Weir
The Dark Web The Deep Web, whilst sounding like a 2005 sci-fi hacker fantasy realm, actually just refers to anything on the internet that won’t directly show up when you search on a search engine like Google. This includes anything from your email homepage, to your Netflix homepage, Read more...
How to Grow Weed in Your Flat
Posted 12:55pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Harold the Giraffe
Kia ora kids! Harold the Giraffe here. Aunty Jacindy might have banned the ol’ wacky baccy despite disproportionately racist levels of cannabis-related incarceration in Aotearoa, but don’t despair. DIY is in our DNA! Anyone can grow the devil’s lettuce in their flat with a bit of Read more...
Kava: From Root to Ritual
Posted 12:38pm Sunday 21st March 2021 by Susana Jones
Kava, yaqona, ‘ava, ‘awa, malok, grog. My earliest memory of this sacred substance was when I was about 10 years old, sitting cross-legged on the floor covered in woven mats in my childhood home. Family surrounded me while my uncle squeezed the brown out of the powdered root and into the Read more...
Best Places to Skate in Dunedin
Posted 2:42pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Jay Bailey
In the glory of an empty, level-four-lockdown Dunedin, I finally faced my fears and learned how to ride a skateboard. Learning to skate at nineteen years of age may not impress some, but after years of desire, envy, fear, and trepidation, I was thrilled to cruise around the old Coupland’s car Read more...
Fuck, I Can’t Cook!
Posted 2:23pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Alice Taylor
This recipe for Pad Thai hits my craving for noodles when I simply don’t have the means to spend on my dearest, Thai Hanoi. I shamelessly use Wattie’s Pad Thai sauce because I am poor and lazy and the sauce is delicious. Serves 3 250g rice noodles 2 eggs 1 onion 4 spring Read more...
Why the Pisces Moon Might Be Fucking With You
Posted 1:49pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
These past few weeks we have been experiencing a Pisces moon. For those unfamiliar with astrology, Pisces (Feb 19 – March 20) is a sign commonly associated with empathy, impressionability, white wine, creativity, and emotional fragility. Basically, they’re weak ass bitches. We knew Read more...
Which Uni Building Are You?
Posted 1:29pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Elliot Weir
1. How old are you? a. A literal baby (1) b. A teenager (2) c. Early 20s Read more...
Jutland Studio/Spaceland: A New Dunedin Creative Renaissance
Posted 1:13pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
The scene: Waterfront warehouse district, surrounded by big trucks, empty buildings, and corrugated iron everywhere. Enter a new resurgence of the local gig scene. A quiet, yellow corner building with high ceiling and some bizarre architecture is the setting for a rejuvenation of the Dunedin music Read more...
Local Produce: Zena Burgess, owner of Zen Blu Jewellery
Posted 12:24pm Sunday 14th March 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
Zen Blu necklaces look like what would happen if you told a mermaid to pull apart some 70s jewellery and make it into something magical. The brightly coloured plastic beads sit alongside pearls, seashells and (presumably) enchanted symbols. On the Instagram page, the necklaces are edited onto a Read more...
Top 10 Ways to Trick Your Flatmates into Doing Shared Flat Meals
Posted 1:34am Sunday 14th March 2021 by Callan George
Just do it. Start cooking. Make a giant fuck off meal and serve it to the whole clan. Odds are, they’ll accept a free feed. Repeat this until your flatties feel as if they have to return the ‘favour’ and then boom, you’ve guilt tripped them a system of mutual Read more...
OPINION: Priority Should Be Given to Māori Students When it Comes to Teaching Te Reo
Posted 1:23am Sunday 14th March 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
The use of te reo Māori has been revived over the past five years. Both non-Māori and Māori are now open to learning the language. However, with this spike in popularity comes the need for the appropriate resources and infrastructure to ensure that anybody who wishes to learn te reo Read more...
Are Mullets Sexy? The Castle Street Perspective
Posted 1:18am Sunday 14th March 2021 by Asia Martusia King
Mullets have a long history. The world’s first mullet was depicted on a metal deity figurine unearthed in an English car park, dating back to 1st-century AD (After Drip). Roman warriors with mullets were engineered for battle, their hair styled out of their eyes and difficult to grab. Murder Read more...
Job Searching, Now With a Side of Mental Health Support
Posted 12:27am Sunday 7th March 2021 by Susana Jones
If you’ve ever been a student searching for a job, you’ve definitely heard of Student Job Search (SJS). If you’re funded by a Daddy and have never been on that job search grind, SJS is a charity, underwritten by MSD and the student unions, that hooks students up with job Read more...
Where Did the Word “Breather” Come From?
Posted 11:33pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Oscar Paul
For years, Otago students were dubbed ‘scarfies’. The word was popularised by the eponymous 1999 film and came loaded with half-a-century of resentment from older generations. As ubiquitous as the ‘scarfie’ moniker once was, it has increasingly been replaced by a newer, more Read more...
What’s Wrong With Freshers?
Posted 10:56pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Fox Meyer
We intercepted first-years on their way out of the Toga Party to ask a simple question: What is the biggest problem in your life right now? Three new friends all admitted that “coming from a solid group of friends back home, and starting anew” was really tough, but patted Read more...
Local Produce: Sometime Winner
Posted 10:35pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Annabelle Vaughan
As the saying goes, you win some, you lose some. This mantra rings especially true for one of Dunedin’s newest up and coming acts, Sometime Winner. The five-piece line up consists of lead singer Louis (who dubs himself Kid Freeman on the Mic), guitarist Silas, violinist Rose, bassist Read more...
From the Parthenon to the Octagon
Posted 10:21pm Saturday 6th March 2021 by Elliot Weir
The first question Critic asked Sam, as we sat down for an interview in the sun, was how The Bacchae is pronounced. The answer, apparently, is ‘back-eye.’ The play is an ancient Athenian tragedy written by Euripedes, reimagined for a modern audience by a local team led by Read more...
What Coping Mechanism Are You?
Posted 11:23pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
How long have you been in Dunedin? a. Less than 2 years Read more...
OG Lime vs. Lime Gen4 vs. Neuron
Posted 11:06pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Alex Leckie-Zaharic
Gone are the simple days when Lime scooters ruled the streets. Scootering in Dunedin is no longer a one-horse race, with Neuron entering the fray in early January and forcing the humble Lime to upgrade, Incredibles-style, to compete. Critic’s self-proclaimed scooter expert took it upon himself Read more...
OPINION: Third Years Need to Stop Fucking Freshers
Posted 10:53pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Sophia Carter Peters
CW: Sexual assault. The fact that you already know what I’m talking about tells me all I need to know. We all have that one skeevy friend who jokes about buying a fresher too many drinks at Catacombs or picking one up on Castle. Their comments are usually followed by a couple of sheepish Read more...
How to Pretend You Know Cricket
Posted 10:37pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Elliot Weir
From deliveries to dismissals, dibbly-dobblers to golden ducks, cricket is an elaborate and perplexing way to waste your time. There are a lot of made-up words involved, like ‘inning’ and ‘wicket’ and ‘dilscoop.’ Aside from white men over the age of 50 and people Read more...
Who would win if the Rakaia Salmon and the Gore Giant Trout fought to the death?
Posted 9:56pm Tuesday 2nd March 2021 by Erin Gourley
In the centre of Gore stands a giant trout. On the outskirts of Rakaia stands a giant salmon. The fish are perched in the same pose — frozen in mid-air with cavernous maws agape. Separated by 452km of State Highway one, these twin titans of the South Island road trip are too far away to see Read more...
Moscato, Rosé, Moscato Rosé: Do They Taste the Same?
Posted 4:16pm Sunday 4th October 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington
Dessert wine, you gotta love her. Perfect for a cheeky necking before a night out, or something sweet you can sip while watching the hit movie ‘Bridesmaids’. Compared to other wines, dessert wine is particularly palatable and easy to drink. But rumour has it, they kind of taste the same Read more...
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