Best Degrees to Ally With During the Apocalypse: Part Two

Posted 10:50am Wednesday 1st April 2020

Alright, we’re back for more. Apparently I forgot a few degrees the first time around, so here’s the first expansion pack for Apocalypse Simulator 2020: Dunedin Edition. Same rules as last time. More options for your 5 flatmates. Eat up.   Offence:   Zoology: These Read more...

Best Degrees to Ally With During the Apocalypse

Posted 3:19pm Monday 30th March 2020

You’re filling out your dream flat, but can only choose five flatmates. You don’t know how long this will last. It could be just four weeks. Or maybe society will break down, and these five people will be all you have in the post-covid hellscape. Choose Read more...

How to Survive a Potential Post-Corona Dunedin Hellscape

Posted 1:17pm Friday 27th March 2020

Welcome to the future.  In this new life, we’ll be faced with many challenges: there may be toilet paper shortages, there may be job loss, and it will be very awkward to cough around anyone you know.    In these trying times, it is important for us to band together, be Read more...

American Exodus

Posted 8:41pm Thursday 19th March 2020

March 14th: Eight confirmed cases of Kiwi Covid. Jacinda Ardern announces that all overseas arrivals in New Zealand must self-isolate for 14 days. Hundreds of American students in New Zealand watch as their country descends into a toilet-paper wasteland. In Aotearoa, these students are mostly Read more...

Look Mom, No Hands!

Posted 6:37pm Thursday 5th March 2020

The following are three true accounts of wet dreams. For the record, wet dreams are totally normal, and rarely this messy. These are the greatest cum-capers, the crème de la crème, the (e)Mission Impossible of nocturnal emissions. Enjoy at the lads’ expense. #1 Woke up from Read more...

Ranking 6 European Cities Based on their Laxatives

Posted 7:05pm Thursday 27th February 2020

For this very important and very specific list, I’ve consulted an expert. Poopie*, an American exchange student, has been struggling with chronic constipation for four years now. You wouldn’t know it by looking at her, but she’s carrying around a baby’s weight of shit, and Read more...

Who is NZUSA and Should You Give a Fuck?

Posted 1:16am Friday 21st February 2020

NZUSA is the New Zealand Union of Students’ Associations, and they have copped their fair share of shit over the years for being inaccessible, secretive, and - worst of all - sucking hard.  This year, however, President Isabella Lenihan-Ikin and co-Vice Presidents Matthew Schep and Sam Read more...

How to Judge a Goon by its Cover

Posted 6:06pm Sunday 11th August 2019

The Question In 2017 I bought a bottle of wine with a dog on the label, and I’ve spent the last two years trying to figure out why I did that. It started with a simple question: “How does an animal on a wine label effect the price?” I thought “expensive wines usually Read more...

Bespoke Quotes from Soaked Oats

Posted 11:19pm Thursday 4th July 2019

When Oscar was a kid, he bumped ‘90s hip-hop. He ran on the sidewalks of St. Albans in Christchurch. Now, he’s in a band with three of his mates. You might’ve heard of them - Soaked Oats. Soaked Oats are the brains behind songs like “Avocado Aficionado” and Read more...

Ranking the Rocks in the Geology Museum on their Chakra Alignment

Posted 7:14pm Thursday 2nd May 2019

Geology. The study of the terrestrial, of rocks and minerals, the earthy matter of the planet we all know and love. Yet what if this terrestrial study was in fact more extra… terrestrial? The rocks - minerals, actually - housed in the geology building are stored behind ancient glass panes Read more...

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Fox Meyer

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