Archive
How to Pretend you know E-Sports
Posted 9:42pm Thursday 17th September 2020 by Anon

As American Baseball All-Star Sean Doolittle said, “sports are like the reward of a functioning society”. We recognise the trials of athletes as an achievement for life being normal. Unfortunately, life is not normal right now. Now that traditional sports are no longer as massive as they Read more...
Learning Te Reo Māori as a Māori Student
Posted 10:48pm Thursday 10th September 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

Te reo Māori is an official language of Aotearoa, but has only been recognised as such since 1987. For Māori, their language has always been the ‘official’ one. For Māori in the early 1900s, most notably before the World Wars, te reo was their first language. However Read more...
Post-Colonial Faith
Posted 10:36pm Thursday 10th September 2020 by Naomii Seah

“Māori theology is spiritual, but it’s also political.” Māori religion and theology has a long and complex history in Aotearoa New Zealand. Importantly, conversion of Māori to Christianity during the 1830s benefitted increasing Crown interest in land speculation: Read more...
Minorities in Medicine: Why Otago University’s proposed cap on medicine will break, not make, the future of our health workforce
Posted 10:34pm Thursday 10th September 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

About two months ago, Critic published a story titled ‘A Seat at Our Table’ which shared the experiences of Māori students here at Otago University and the stigma surrounding alternative entry pathways. While the article and interviewees were met with plenty of support, there was no Read more...
The Faces Behind the Feed: The Stories Behind Dunedin’s Most Iconic Cafes
Posted 10:13pm Thursday 3rd September 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

Dunedin loves its legendary cafes. They are meeting places, study spaces, a place for a catch up with friends, a gig, or a date. Our social lives, as well as our energy meters, revolve around these spaces. But there’s a high chance that we don’t know the stories behind these places, or Read more...
The Politics of Shared Flat Cooking
Posted 10:12pm Thursday 3rd September 2020 by Caroline Moratti

Shared flat cooking can sound like the best idea in the world. You get to save time, money and kitchen space, all whilst bonding with your flatties over a kitchen table and a square meal. What could be more charming? The reality though, can be far from the Brady Bunch lovefest you might be Read more...
What’s for Dinner?
Posted 9:57pm Thursday 3rd September 2020 by Fox Meyer

“Cooking is about controlling fire and water.” With two elements safely under his belt, our professional chef-for-a-day is halfway to becoming the Avatar. Critic extorted him for a free meal. I asked Tony Heptinstall (Senior Lecturer at the Polytech’s Food Design Institute) to Read more...
How to Make Your First Date Less Boring
Posted 9:18pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Naomii Seah

Dating in Dunedin is hard. It’s even harder when the three options available for a date location are: a generic George St cafe, a bar, or their house at 3am. Without some real imagination, Dunedin is relentlessly boring - where else are you going to go? St Clair? The museum? While all decent Read more...
Best Places to Have Deep and Meaningfuls
Posted 9:16pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

If you’re looking to change up your environment for unloading your emotional baggage on some friends and listening to their existential crises, then hitting up a lookout is an obvious solution. Whether it’s a dusty Sunday or a tearful Thursday, there’s nothing like a car therapy Read more...
Class of 2020: Graduates in the Midst of Covid-19
Posted 9:14pm Thursday 27th August 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

Graduating is both scary and exciting. On one hand, it’s a major milestone signifying great achievements, hard work and the start of a new chapter. On the other, it’s a time filled with uncertainty and nervousness as we enter our first fancy grad jobs or gap years. But for the class of Read more...
The Cannabis Referendum: Why Young People Are Pro Legalisation
Posted 8:27pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Jackson Burgess

The cannabis referendum - which is taking place next month, simultaneously with the general election - is about more than just whether or not you want to blaze up with your mates. On 19 September, every voter will choose ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to the Cannabis Legalisation and Read more...
The Downfall of Drum and Bass: The Dunedin Musicians Who are Reinvigorating the Dunedin Sound
Posted 8:16pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

There are many sounds which come to mind when one thinks of Dunedin. The sound of students screaming at flat parties, the wrath of an evil seagull on the hunt for his perfect French fry, the shattering of glass bottles, the static of a lecturer’s microphone, and perhaps most infamously, the Read more...
How to Pretend You Know Basketball
Posted 8:14pm Thursday 13th August 2020 by Anon

If an all-powerful alien entity approached Earth, and in a moment of mercy they allow us a chance to earn our intergalactic freedom via a game of our choice, that choice would undoubtedly be basketball. They’ve even made a fucking film about it, Space Jam, starring real aliens and the single Read more...
Why Go Dry?
Posted 12:31pm Sunday 9th August 2020 by Naomii Seah

“Drinking had taken a depressing toll on my mental health,” said Sushanth. It’s a familiar story. Drinking has become so normalised in Aotearoa that sinking a few beersies with the mates is often the default mode of socialising. Although there can be nothing wrong with Read more...
The Cheapest Drinks in the Octy: A Drunk Investigation
Posted 10:05pm Thursday 6th August 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

Everyone knows the key to going into town is pre-loading. Without doing this, we would not only freeze to death, but be sober enough to realise that town is shit and we should be in bed. It’s also the cheapest option, and can be the best part of a night out. But regardless of how much you Read more...
Dunedin’s Pub Quizzes, Ranked
Posted 10:03pm Thursday 6th August 2020 by Fox Meyer

Considering a cheeky quiz night? Here’s what to expect from your local pubs. Dunedin has enough pub quizzes to have something for everyone. From hardcore quizzes to pissups with a side of trivia, there’s plenty to be found. The scores I’ve given are just a personal rating, so Read more...
How to Pretend you know Rugby
Posted 8:37pm Thursday 30th July 2020 by Anon

When I was a wee lad, we would jump in the car, head out to Grandad’s and watch rugby on his big telly. It was legendary. Yelling, jumping, Bluebird chips; from a young age I was hooked on the culture of this bizarre sport. As I got to uni, and started attending the Zoo (rest in paradise, Read more...
Ready, Set, Go: Red Cards in Dunedin
Posted 1:24pm Sunday 26th July 2020 by Caroline Moratti

A red card is a sacred institution, a legacy bestowed to us from our ancestors. Much like oral sex, it’s a delight, but only if you know what you’re doing. There are rules you must follow - both as giver and receiver - to ensure that everyone has a good time. No one likes too much teeth, Read more...
Last Man Standing
Posted 1:18pm Sunday 26th July 2020 by Fox Meyer

8 months, 2,800 kilometers and $25,000 in donations later, Otago alum Jono Hartland (of Scarfie Weather fame) is almost done with the Te Araroa trail. This man is walking the length of the entire country. Why? “At this point it’s about exposure - getting as many people to donate what Read more...
A Seat at Our Table
Posted 1:14pm Sunday 26th July 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

Throughout my years at university, I have been relentlessly interrogated, ridiculed and challenged on one thing: my Māori heritage. Something which, despite it being no one else’s business, has been a consistent topic of conversation. A conversation which always leads to invasive Read more...
Wild Boi Pete Naik: Wildlife Photographer
Posted 7:59pm Thursday 16th July 2020 by Fox Meyer

Pete Naik has only sent a dick pic to customers once, and you can see it on page 3. The road leading up to that moment started in Dunedin, and following an unconventional path, it also ended in Dunedin. The same day that he snapped the picture of that pink penis, NZ began to close its borders to Read more...
Ihumātao: A Year On
Posted 7:56pm Thursday 16th July 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

"Toitu te whenua, ake ake ake" we chanted. It’s July 26, 2019, and 300 people gathered in front of the Otago Museum reserve. We marched down the main street, collecting newcomers as we did. We circled around the Octagon. The Octagon is where marches usually end but, this time, we Read more...
Which Water Around Campus Is Tastiest?
Posted 7:53pm Thursday 16th July 2020 by Critic

During a dusty darty one afternoon, I drank from the Leith river. It left me bedridden for a week with a fever and a cold sweat. Every flush of the toilet was literally flushing down what miniscule amounts of energy and happiness I had left. Student health diagnosed me with ‘ruining your Read more...
How to Celebrate Matariki and Simultaneously Fix Your Whole Life
Posted 1:22pm Sunday 12th July 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

Matariki, or Puanga for some iwi, is the integral time in the Māori Lunar calendar when a cluster of nine stars become visible in our sky during Winter, signifying the New Year. This year, Matariki is observed from 13 – 20 July. Matariki was an important time for Māori ancestors Read more...
Horsin’ Around: Ketamine on Campus
Posted 1:19pm Sunday 12th July 2020 by Asia Martusia King

In March, I got a Google invite from the University of Otago. 2pm – 4pm. KETAMINE. Ketamine is an anaesthetic, known for its usage on horses as a tranquilliser. It also gets you fucked up and therefore is illegal for recreational use. Ketamine can be found on campus, but only if you Read more...
Girls Who Game
Posted 1:13pm Sunday 12th July 2020 by Naomii Seah

Women have hobbies. That seems like an obvious statement, but in some ways, it’s radical. Since the dawn of time, women have been persecuted for enjoying the same things that men enjoy—whether it’s comic books, certain TV shows, or gaming. For some unknown reason, the thought of Read more...
Ranking Our Childhood TV Presenters Based on How Much I Want to Fight Them
Posted 1:47am Friday 3rd July 2020 by Henessey Griffiths

Children’s television in the early 2000’s was such a vibe. Whether it be waking up every Sunday to try call the What Now Telly-Op’s to get some free gunge, or trying to get your spot on Sticky Stars Duets; high quality shows like What Now, Sticky TV, Studio 2 and the Erin Simpson Read more...
Student Organisers on Black Lives Matter
Posted 1:24am Friday 3rd July 2020 by Naomii Seah

“People are here because they want to see change,” said TJ, one of the organizers of the Dunedin Black LivesMatter march on June 14. It was the beginning of level two. Hundreds of Dunedites flooded the streets, wearing masks and brandishing pickets. The crowd moved down George Street Read more...
Venues are Struggling, and We Should Care More About It
Posted 11:23pm Thursday 21st May 2020 by Henessey Griffiths

Going to gigs is about more than live music. It includes a smorgasbord of various things that come together to form the gig experience: the other punters, the vibe, the IPAs available. The voyage that musicians have been on, from stage to livestream, has been reasonably well documented. But what Read more...
Radio One Deep Dive: Unapologetically Loud, Live and Local
Posted 10:30pm Thursday 21st May 2020 by Sinead Gill

Sean Norling is the station manager at Radio One. If you’ve never met him in person, chances are you wouldn’t recognise him in passing. His vibe is lowkey. He doesn’t like his photo being taken. When Critic met him in his office, it was like he felt pained to be interviewed: Read more...
Māori Experiences In Aotearoa’s Music Industry
Posted 7:26pm Thursday 21st May 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

Māori mainstream music had a breakthrough in 1984 with ‘Poi E’ by Patea Māori Club, reviving te reo Māori songs within a country that popularised little beforehand. Notably, Prince Tui Teka was another early Māori artist who performed songs in te reo Māori Read more...
How to Develop a Nicotine Addiction
Posted 1:06am Friday 15th May 2020 by Naomii Seah

When I was 18, I smoked my first cigarette. I was roaring drunk, on the balcony of an Auckland club, and I remember feeling so cool—rebellious, even. The morning after, however, I began to feel super guilty. My dad had smoked cigarettes his whole life, and he lost a kidney for it. I remember Read more...
Long Live the King
Posted 11:58pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Fox Meyer

According to over 150 Critic readers, these are the definitive King’s Cup rules for Otago students: 2: You, with 93.6%. Nominate a drink. 3: Me, with 93.6%. You must drink. 4: Whores, with 61.8%. People identifying as female must drink. 5: House Rules, with Read more...
Period Suppression: The Hidden Benefit of Contraception
Posted 4:19pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Naomii Seah

The first time I got my period, I was nine. I didn’t know what a period was, and I didn’t know why people were making such a huge deal out of it. It didn’t hurt much, it was just alarming. I was sure that it wasn’t normal to bleed out of your vagina, and I was sure adults Read more...
DIY Tampons: A Warning, Not A Guide
Posted 4:08pm Thursday 14th May 2020 by Henessey Griffiths

There is no worse feeling than when you get a surprise period. On the one hand, it’s cool because it means you’re not pregnant. On the other hand, you have to deal with blood leaking out of your uterus for a week or longer, and all the other hormonal side effects alongside it. Everyone Read more...
Students’ Paradise: Quirky, Character-Building Villa, Full of Fun Surprises
Posted 4:53pm Monday 11th May 2020 by Caroline Moratti

Betty is a Psychology major in her second year, living in a four bedroom villa in gorgeous North Dunedin. The 21-year-old welcomed Critic into her bespoke, contemporary home to showcase the best of Dunedin flatting. The first thing you notice upon entering is the striking placement of the Read more...
DIY Flat Furniture
Posted 1:24pm Monday 11th May 2020 by Sinead Gill

Pallets and their younger brother, the beer crate, are God-tier DIY materials. You cannot fight me on this. This is a universal truth. Between pallets and beer crates you can make literally any kind of furniture known to man. For years, my bed base was four pallets slapped beside each other, no Read more...
The Great Critic Suburb Review
Posted 4:52pm Sunday 10th May 2020 by Caroline Moratti

The journey from hall to flat is like from womb to breast; it involves sweat, tears, and a lot of involvement from your mother. But where to even start looking? Let’s say you hop onto TradeMe Property, ready to search - but what suburb do you pop into that little box? Consider looking beyond Read more...
Flat Hunting Tips
Posted 4:06pm Sunday 10th May 2020 by Caroline Moratti

Every year Critic tells freshers not to sign up for a flat in first semester. Every year, they fail to heed our advice. So, we thought, what the hell, let’s just roll with it. Although the global pandemic might have delayed flat hunts a bit, rest assured the season will soon be upon us in Read more...
Lime: A Year of Outlash, Antics, and Scooting
Posted 10:54am Wednesday 15th April 2020 by Wyatt Ryder

It’s been over one year since Lime hit the streets of Dunedin. Students rejoiced when the pavement was filled with the bright green toys on 10 January 2019. Students wondered: do you ride in the cycle lane? On the street? On the pavement? Nobody knew, and nobody cared. Anarchy reigned Read more...
First Year Woes: Freshers in the face of Covid-19
Posted 12:35pm Thursday 9th April 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

It’s no secret that 2020 is shaping up to be a bit of a shit show for everyone thanks to our special friend ‘Rona. But in amongst the panic and chaos that has swept our university community, I feel there is one demographic which has been hit particularly hard by this event. The freshers. Read more...
Love in Lockdown
Posted 10:26am Wednesday 8th April 2020 by Naomii Seah

If you’re single as fuck, like me, the Covid-19 lockdown is a government mandated four week dry spell. Two weeks in, and I’m wanking with my left hand so I can pretend it’s someone else. I’ve named my sex toys (Buzz and Woody) and I’m taking increasingly long, hot Read more...
Sweet Dreams are Made of Cheese
Posted 3:55pm Monday 6th April 2020 by Phillip Plant

The pirate ship’s remains lay scattered on the beach. The pirate King, still breathing, is dripping with salt water, sweat, tears, and blood all over your lap, on which his head is laid. His exposed torse shines in the moonlight. “It’s just us now,” he says to you; his voice Read more...
Interior Design to Optimise Your Bedroom
Posted 3:15pm Wednesday 1st April 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

Currently, very few students have the luxury of sprawling their stuff into various living rooms or home offices. Many only have their bedrooms to work with. The following is a guide to optimise the space you have, and turn it into the versatile space that all students deserve. 1. Keep your study Read more...
Best Degrees to Ally With During the Apocalypse: Part Two
Posted 10:50am Wednesday 1st April 2020 by Fox Meyer

Alright, we’re back for more. Apparently I forgot a few degrees the first time around, so here’s the first expansion pack for Apocalypse Simulator 2020: Dunedin Edition. Same rules as last time. More options for your 5 flatmates. Eat up. Offence: Zoology: These Read more...
Best Degrees to Ally With During the Apocalypse
Posted 3:19pm Monday 30th March 2020 by Fox Meyer

You’re filling out your dream flat, but can only choose five flatmates. You don’t know how long this will last. It could be just four weeks. Or maybe society will break down, and these five people will be all you have in the post-covid hellscape. Choose Read more...
Anxiety 101
Posted 11:53am Thursday 26th March 2020 by Caroline Moratti

It’s hard not to feel anxious right now. There’s a lot of uncertainty about what’s going to come, not to mention stress about your family and the economy and well, it kind of just feels like the whole world is on fire right now. About a week ago I started having trouble sleeping. I Read more...
American Exodus
Posted 8:41pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Fox Meyer

March 14th: Eight confirmed cases of Kiwi Covid. Jacinda Ardern announces that all overseas arrivals in New Zealand must self-isolate for 14 days. Hundreds of American students in New Zealand watch as their country descends into a toilet-paper wasteland. In Aotearoa, these students are mostly Read more...
Hospo Hell
Posted 6:42pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

Getting a part-time hospitality job is like being a first year in a hall. Not all do it, but for most people it is an inevitable and expected part of the University experience. From the outside, casual waitressing, bartending, cleaning, and serving, all seem like perfect, simple side-hustles to our Read more...
Give Nothing to Racism: A Year On.
Posted 6:40pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Naomii Seah

On 15 March 2019, a white supremacist terrorist walked into a mosque during Friday prayer and gunned down 51 innocent people, injuring 49 more. It was the kind of news that sent a whole nation into shock. Most people remember exactly where they were when they heard the news, and will remember for Read more...