Archive

Editorial: What’s Up, Love?

Posted 11:58am Sunday 4th October 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Welcome to the Love Issue! In this edition, you’ll find a double love feature, double love in culture, and a double Moaningful Confessions. Don’t say we don’t love you.  This issue was pretty spontaneous, but I think it’s well-timed. It’s the second to last Read more...

TLDR: Issue 25 2026

Posted 11:45am Sunday 4th October 2026 by Critic Staff

Flipper Fest! The charity event of the year is back! October 9th and 10th come and support the conservation of the Hoiho Yellow-Eyed Penguins. Stay updated through @opac_otago and @flipper.fest!!🐧 UniQ are hosting our AGM on the 9th of October, 7pm, at Clubs & Socs' Evison Lounge. Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Double Feature

Posted 11:44am Sunday 4th October 2026 by Smutette

A Practical Lesson in Colour Theory By Smutette Let me set the scene. It’s Halloween. The night begins with me, determined to be Smurfette, buck-ass naked as my flatmate paints my entire body blue. Not with body paint, but electric blue acrylic paint we’d used on our flat sign. In Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 25 2026

Posted 11:41am Sunday 4th October 2026 by The Orb

Aquarius Having trouble deciding which personality to go with today? The allegations of you being “pretentious” and “vapi” are not going to go away unless you lock in and find a bit of inner peace. So take a minute and try finding yourself before you forget who you actually Read more...

OUSA Exec: Kamesha Jones

Posted 11:40am Sunday 4th October 2026 by Kamesha Jones

You are probably being asked to vote left, right and centre – literally. Two weeks ago, you might have had a flurry of Instagram requests from potential OUSA election candidates (guilty). If you were remotely clocked into anything the candidates were saying – you would have noticed a Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The day I lost two things: my fave g-string and my…

Posted 3:51pm Saturday 26th September 2026 by Chappell Moan

Let me set the scene. It’s a Saturday night in my home town, and the clubs are calling my name. Naturally, I put on my sluttiest outfit and hit town with the confidence of a white man. ‘Come on Eileen’ was playing as I locked eyes with the pookiest man I had ever seen. Thankfully Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 24 2026

Posted 3:48pm Saturday 26th September 2026 by The Orb

Libra: Your love life has been on life support in 2026. It’s time to start thinking about dipping your toes back in the water, before your flatmates start feeling bad for you. Ask someone on a date – the stars promise that it’s time.  Hangxiety-inducing moment in town: Read more...

OUSA Exec: Vote.

Posted 3:46pm Saturday 26th September 2026 by OUSA Exec

Every year students have plenty to say about OUSA, and don’t get me wrong, that’s exactly how it should be. But if you’ve got strong opinions about who should be leading and advocating for you in 2027, the best way to make sure you’re heard is to vote!   The Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 24 2026

Posted 3:43pm Saturday 26th September 2026 by The Quizzler

Across 1 - Division 4 - Smooch 9 - Mannequin 10 - Joeys 11 - Anakin Skywalker 14 - Sid 15 - Chests 18 - Ensuite 20 - Chud 23 - Omit 24 - Odious 25 - Hoarse 26 - Due Down: 1 - Doomsday 2 - Veins 3 - Splendid 5 - Oreos 6 - Holster 7 - Sanjay 8 - Judas 12 - Alias 13 - Read more...

Editorial: The Crawl To The Finish Line

Posted 3:39pm Saturday 26th September 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Last Wednesday, I was on the phone with my best friend, Grace.  For avid Critic nerds, Grace was the main creator of the For The Girls game included in the centrefold of the Party Issue. Nowadays, I’m sad to say that we don’t find nearly enough time to talk with busy schedules Read more...

Critic Recipes For Bored Fuckers

Posted 5:53pm Thursday 24th September 2026 by Harry Almey

They said independence and flatting would be fun. What a load of hogwash. Before long, you've mastered the art of quick gruel for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Your parents are concerned: “you only eat what?” You explain that sometimes you simply need to shove something in your gob Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 23 2026

Posted 11:57am Sunday 20th September 2026 by The Orb

Capricorn Mid-sem is over, which means this is the one golden week where going to Central might not send you into a full panic attack. Capitalise on this tiny window of freedom before exams ruin your life again. Head to St Kilda at the witching hour and scream your woes into the waves. School Club Read more...

OUSA Exec: Tumuaki Takirua

Posted 11:52am Sunday 20th September 2026 by OUSA Exec

Mauri ora e te iwi! Whoop whoop, here’s your other Māori rep, to talk more about Te Wiki o Te Reo Māori! I’ll keep this pretty paku because the week’s already over – but the celebration of te reo Māori will carry on forever.  AsI write this piece, we Read more...

Editorial: Enrol To Vote By The 25th of October

Posted 11:50am Sunday 20th September 2026 by Hanna Varrs

This issue has turned out to be pretty politics heavy, and I’m pleased about it. Politics should be at the forefront of everyone’s minds right now, and I wouldn’t be doing my due diligence if I didn’t scream at everyone to enrol to vote. As you’ll see on the cover, Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 23 2026

Posted 11:40am Sunday 20th September 2026 by The Quizzler

Across 1 - The Water Horse 7 - Exposed 8 - Scrotum 9 - Divorced 10 - Regent 13 - Daleks 14 - Spaceman 15 - Musings 17 - Inhabit 21 - Abode 22 - Germ 23 - Cumin 24 - Delhi Down 1 - Tweedledum 2 - Woohoo 3 - Trenches 4 - Hose 5 - Shoegaze 6 - Gumption 11 - Amphibious 12 - Read more...

Friends With Benefits

Posted 11:39am Sunday 20th September 2026 by Heeni Koero Te Rerenoa (Sky)

If there’s one thing a Ngāpuhi likes, it’s arguing a case. Unfortunately for everyone else, I’ve always got one.  When I left Whangārei, most people assured me I was about to meet a whole new world of “like-minded” people. Unfortunately, I interpreted Read more...

Booze Review: Absolut Vodka with Sprite Watermelon Zero Sugar 5% Cans

Posted 11:35am Sunday 20th September 2026 by Swig60

Welcome back beer lovers and toe suckers. It’s the final stretch of the uni year, so we only have a handful of drinking weekends, a semester of lectures, 2 showers, and 400 wanks (or whatever girls do instead) left to go. For this week's drink, we have something that smells like vodka, Read more...

Editorial: Issue 22 2026

Posted 12:31pm Sunday 13th September 2026 by Heeni Koero Te Rerenoa (Sky)

My mum was 18 when she had me. She liked the Bratz, and apparently knew I would too. So when it came time to name her first daughter, she had a plan. The only flaw in this master plan was that she was having a brown-eyed Māori girl in Whangārei, named after the whitest Bratz girl of the Read more...

Da Juicy Joint

Posted 11:20am Sunday 13th September 2026 by Critic

Island Gewl Ngā kai 1½ cups frozen pineapple ¼ cup vanilla high-protein yoghurt ½ cup coconut water 1 scoop protein powder ½ tsp chia seeds 4 ice cubes Juicy Couture Ngā kai ¾ cup unsweetened almond milk ¼ cup Read more...

Before You Leave Ōtepoti

Posted 11:18am Sunday 13th September 2026 by Te Āwhina Brundell

Congratulations, tauira mā. You survived another Ōtepoti winter. The days are getting longer, the flowers are popping up, and now and then the sun stays out long enough for us to remember that Dunedin can be quite beautiful. Unfortunately, we've also reached that point in the Read more...

Carpool Confession

Posted 11:16am Sunday 13th September 2026 by Te Āwhina Brundell

I have a confession to make: Sometimes, speaking te reo Māori scares me more around other Māori than it does around anyone else. We talk constantly about revitalisation. Kōrero Māori. Normalise te reo Māori. Use what you have, as much as you can. Kia kaha te reo Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 22 2026

Posted 11:13am Sunday 13th September 2026 by The Orb

Libra: Your brain might be yelling at you to start early prep for finals, but your wairua is screaming to pick up a pencil, knitting needles, or literally anything with slightly more whimsy than grinding out Quizlet flashcards. Give in to the art before the study burnout sets in.  Your Bratz Read more...

Something Sweet From Te Rito

Posted 11:11am Sunday 13th September 2026 by Jarna Flintoff

For some tauira, connecting with te ao Māori is like finding your way home. For others, it can feel like turning up at the wrong house, standing at the front door and wondering if someone is gonna ask you who your parents are before letting you in.  University can be the first chance to Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 22 2026

Posted 11:03am Sunday 13th September 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS  1 - Ready for the reins! [SADDLED]  5 - She comes with an outfit change! [DOLL] 6 - South American country with a spicy name! [CHILE] 8 -  Seeing red. [MARS] 9 -  There aren’t enough in a day! [HOURS] 11 - Charmed, captivated. [ENCHANTED] 14 - Read more...

Diva Dashboard

Posted 11:01am Sunday 13th September 2026 by Critic Staff

Guest Contributors Te Āwhina Brundell Ngāpuhi, Ngāti Kahu, Ngāti Hine, Te Hikutū, Te Whānau-ā-Apanui, Ngāti Porou, Kāi Tahu, Waitaha, Kāti Māmoe Last Seen: 1 year ago in Te Reo o Te Moana Nickname – Valley Gewl Zodiac Sign Read more...

TLDR: Issue 21 2026

Posted 11:56am Sunday 6th September 2026 by Critic Staff

Anthsoc, SOUPPES, Classoc, and Hsoc are excited to bring you a collaborative Humanities Wine and Cheese night. On the 16th September, 6:00- 9:30PM, in the Humanities common room (Burns building). Tickets for members are $5, and non-members are $10. Everyone is welcome! BYO wine.  Calling all Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Lessons I Learnt From Breaking My Penis

Posted 11:51am Sunday 6th September 2026 by Casamoaner

It's away! It's a hit! Negative. It didn't go in. It just impacted on the surface.  I woke up the morning after a fun night with a severe case of morning wouldn't. Nothing. Like picking up a phone that's been disconnected. Like turning the key on a car with no battery. It Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 21 2026

Posted 11:49am Sunday 6th September 2026 by The Orb

Pisces Everyone knows that you want that Capricorn bad, despite your attempts to act aloof and professionally detached. Stop pretending you don’t care because out of fear caring might make you look stupid. You already look stupid. You may as well get what you want. Your Brunch Order: Read more...

OUSA Exec: Why You Should Come Along To The Student General Meeting

Posted 11:48am Sunday 6th September 2026 by Daniel Leamy

The Executive is proposing changes to the OUSA Constitution that would reshape how student representation works from 2027 onwards. The proposal includes new roles, changes to existing portfolios, and the addition of a dedicated Disabilities Representative. These are significant changes that would Read more...

Editorial: The Week Of My Dreams

Posted 11:47am Sunday 6th September 2026 by Hanna Varrs

On the 29th of June, I received an email from some people representing a photo company. Long story short, they were requesting $365 due to using a picture that amounted to copyright infringement. Uh oh! They sent a link to where we’d used this material, which was a random Facebook post from Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 20 2026

Posted 12:36pm Sunday 23rd August 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS 1 - Surrealism 6 - Cake 8 - Beluga 9 - Neon 10 - Bozos 11 - Siren 12 - Infamy 15 - Dread 16 - Grim 18 - Capo 20 - Flamingo 22 - Tales 24 - Abundant 25 - Hoax 26 - Stronghold 27 - Evil DOWN 1 - Sculpting 2 - Ribs 3 - Eelworms 4 - Lagoon 5 - Mona Lisa 6 - Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: A Nail-Biting Tale

Posted 12:35pm Sunday 23rd August 2026 by Chappell Moan

We all have that person that’s somehow accumulated an impressive amount of lore and become a celebrity within the friend group. Mine was this guy who I had no romantic feelings for, and who I invited to my birthday party – entirely as a joke. By some miracle, he showed up. Right on Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 20 2026

Posted 12:34pm Sunday 23rd August 2026 by The Orb

Leo The slopes are calling your name – the Ōtepoti snow day gave you hunger for the alps. You're ready to sell your sanity, fill a five-seater car with eight of your friends and make the long road trip to Queenstown. Beware: there will be at least three arguments on the way!! Your Read more...

OUSA Exec

Posted 12:24pm Sunday 23rd August 2026 by OUSA Exec

Kia ora,  The OUSA Exec are aware of reports from students alleging white supremacist activity in Dunedin. At this stage, it is not clear whether these groups have any involvement with Otago students. While there is currently no confirmed connection, we believe it is important to keep our Read more...

Editorial: Read This If You Intend To Run For OUSA Exec

Posted 12:22pm Sunday 23rd August 2026 by Hanna Varrs

The OUSA student executive elections are coming up, with campaigning beginning on the 14th of September. For those that are tuned in to the happenings of OUSA, they’ll have some understanding of the current Exec roles.  However, the Exec has passed a decision this week to put major Read more...

Signed, Sealed, (Still Left On) Delivered

Posted 11:28am Sunday 23rd August 2026 by Heeni Koero Te Rerenoa (Sky)

If there’s one thing a Ngāpuhi likes, it’s arguing a case. Unfortunately for everyone else, I’ve always got one.  We were promised that phones would make us more connected. Instant messaging arrived and, for once, the name did exactly what it said on the tin: messages Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 19 2026

Posted 10:35am Sunday 16th August 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS: 1 - Sivle Talk 5 - Spuds 10 - Tintin 11 - Astute 12 - Heartthrob 13 - Stub 14 - Eat my shorts 18 - American Gothic 21 - Oklahoma 22 - Vodka 23 - Robert Pattinson DOWN: 2 - Vienna 3 - Enlist 4 - Loiter 6 - Pout 7 - Super bowl 8 - Blabbering 9 - Itchy 14 - Elsa 15 Read more...

TLDR: Issue 19 2026

Posted 10:34am Sunday 16th August 2026 by Critic Staff

The Otago Literary Society is running their monthly Book Club on the 20th of August, 6-7:30pm in Room 3, Clubs & Socs. This month they are collaborating with the History Students Society with the theme "History". Attendees can bring any literary text, Read more...

Letters: Issue 19 2026

Posted 10:19am Sunday 16th August 2026 by Critic

Response to JK Rowling Concerns Thank you for raising your concerns about our choice of theme for this year’s Law Revue, Harry Potter. We completely agree with your criticism of JK Rowling, she's a dick! The content of the show is critical of her views, and she is appropriately Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 19 2026

Posted 10:15am Sunday 16th August 2026 by The Orb

Cancer The break’s coming up, and all you can think about is how time is slipping right through your fingers. Stock up on your favourite chocolate to stress eat now, because even though your brain is fried, we both know you’re still going to try to shove more lectures into Read more...

OUSA Exec: Choose Your Power Plan Wisely

Posted 10:06am Sunday 16th August 2026 by Zoe Eckhoff

Are you signed with Contact Energy? Got that free power from 9-12am? Well, here’s your Residential Rep’s hot take – consider an alternative.  There’s lots of debate on which power plan is the best, or which will save you the most money. The reality is: the best plan Read more...

Editorial: Less Room For Me, More Room For Politics

Posted 9:59am Sunday 16th August 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Holy fuck – what a week! Firstly, I am absolutely thrilled with the amount of letters Critic has been receiving lately. I literally couldn’t fit them all in the mag, even with me cutting this editorial in half. Talk about student engagement.  Secondly, this issue has turned out Read more...

The Politics of Being Nice

Posted 9:51am Sunday 16th August 2026 by Heeni Koero Te Rerenoa (Sky)

If there’s one thing a Ngāpuhi likes, it’s arguing a case. Unfortunately for everyone else, I’ve always got one. That’s probably why I’ve never quite understood Kiwis’ obsession with being nice. Between inherited British politeness, our talent for Read more...

Booze Review/Recipe: Boozy Hot Chocolate

Posted 9:48am Sunday 16th August 2026 by Swig60

Sup snowers and blowers! It was snowing a couple weeks ago, and not the kind of snow you find in the Hyde Street portaloos. Safe to say, we got rinsed on the day we were supposed to write this, but what better to write about than day drinking!? You can’t say snow to a no-day. We Read more...

Shell Armour Oil Review

Posted 4:34pm Saturday 8th August 2026 by Sir Fucks-A-Lot

Now, as a Knight of the Pound Table, I must say that I have tried my fair share of armour lube. I tend toward a low sheen, noise reducing, odourless oil. The Shell Amour Oil is just that, with the added bonuses of being perfectly neutral and rust-evasive. The multi-head applicator tip is great Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 18 2026

Posted 4:07pm Saturday 8th August 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS: 1 - Excalibur 5 - Heart 9 - Rivendell 10 - Yeti 11 - Lord Farquaad 13 - Pea 14 - Shellphone 18 - Tea 20 - Genovia 21 - Unicorn 23 - Beanstalk 24 - Suspicious Stew DOWN: 1 - Emerald City 2 - Cerberus 3 - Love 4 - Banner 6 - Ariel 7 - Taniwha 8 - Flora 12 - Read more...

Letters: Issue 18 2026

Posted 3:58pm Saturday 8th August 2026 by Critic

Tēnā koutou Te Ārohi While traipsing the tiled halls of the Robertson I saw posters for this year's Law Revue, and was disappointed to see the theme: a parody of Harry Potter (Harry Notter: The Boy Who Passed). I just want to remind everyone of some matters about JK Read more...

University: A Story Of Your Own Making

Posted 3:52pm Saturday 8th August 2026 by Fergus Parks

Hear ye! Hear ye! It's your Post Grad Rep back for another Exec column! More often than not, the greatest stories and fairytales we know are born from the realities of the world we live in. You reading this might not feel like you're part of some grand adventure, slaying a dragon or Read more...

Editorial: Once Upon A Time…

Posted 3:48pm Saturday 8th August 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Once upon a time, there was a student magazine called Critic Te Ārohi. And it was the best publication in the entire world.  I am super proud of this issue, but it feels wrong to be writing this editorial. That’s because this issue belongs to Stella Caulton, the designer for this Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 18 2026

Posted 3:32pm Saturday 8th August 2026 by The Orb

Aries Fire burns bright in your heart, yet the one you seek may be blinded by flames. You leap toward peaks high in the heavens, but mind thy step – don’t mistake treacherous lands for a safe haven.  Your fairytale: Thumbelina Taurus Your pocket has been swindled of copper, Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 17 2026

Posted 11:48am Sunday 2nd August 2026 by The Quizzler

ANSWERS: ACROSS: 1 - Johnny Knoxville 10 - Party rocking 12 - Vomit 13 - Imminent 14 - Usurp 17 - Falsehoods 19 - Phantom 21 - Poker Face 23 - Plankton 27 - Sideburns 28 - Boloney 31 - Aromas 34 - Abseiling 36 - Movie 37 - Party hat 38 - Florida DOWN: 2 - Orgasm 3 - Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 17 2026

Posted 11:42am Sunday 2nd August 2026 by The Orb

Aries You’ve been running on less than empty lately. Sleeping on your laptop in lectures just isn't the same as hitting your pillow at home, even if the lecture theatre is warmer and your lecturer’s voice is basically free ASMR. Go home and get some rest. Your party game: Arm Read more...

OUSA Exec: Kamesha Jones

Posted 11:29am Sunday 2nd August 2026 by OUSA Exec

For a long time, OUSA has been relatively apolitical in practice, on campus and in our strategic direction. However, over the last year, we have seen this idea begin to overturn. Seeds of political discourse internally, as well as better engagement with student politics, have grown into a more solid Read more...

Editorial: What’s Up, Party People?

Posted 11:28am Sunday 2nd August 2026 by Hanna Varrs

I went to high school in rural-ish Canterbury – Lincoln, to be exact. We didn’t really have a whole lot of parties, and the ones that were thrown were either crammed into cookie-cutter suburban houses, held in someone’s shed or, if things were really fancy, hosted by a local Read more...

The Price of Free

Posted 11:23am Sunday 2nd August 2026 by Heeni Koero Te Rerenoa (Sky)

If there’s one thing a Ngāpuhi likes, it’s arguing a case. Unfortunately for everyone else, I’ve always got one.  Artificial intelligence is having a phenomenal year. Apparently, it can write your assignment, draft a CV, answer difficult emails, and plan your holiday Read more...

Booze Review: Little Fat Lamb Shot Bucket

Posted 11:21am Sunday 2nd August 2026 by Britney Brew-ski

For Critic Te Ārohi’s inaugural Party Issue, Swig60 has outsourced their liver to a guest reviewer. Whether this was a strategic editorial decision or simply because the boys finally realised they had to pace themselves is unclear. Either way, someone had to answer the important question: Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The Biter

Posted 9:38am Sunday 26th July 2026 by Lady Gag-me

Ok guys, let's throw it back… all the way to first year. I’m now in my fifth year, so this was long enough ago that I should probably have some perspective, but not long enough that I don’t lie awake wondering if I accidentally invented an entire situationship with a man who Read more...

Letters: Issue 16 2026

Posted 9:34am Sunday 26th July 2026 by Critic

Dear Madam Critic I am writing in disgust at the recent price increases at uni cafés. From the start of this semester, a thing Chicken and Cranberry Panini or a Breakfast Wrap is $12!! This is nuts! Campus cafe food was never supposed to be Michelin Star quality, but it was supposed to at Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 16 2026

Posted 9:32am Sunday 26th July 2026 by The Orb

Aries It’s time to cultivate more than just black mould in your bedroom. Grab those stolen plant clippings and turn your flat into a greenhouse. The best part? You can blast your heater to a ‘tropical’ level and blame the power bill on your green thumb.  Your cleaning Read more...

OUSA Exec: Student Strike For Education

Posted 9:30am Sunday 26th July 2026 by Flynn Nisbett

We aren’t entitled to anything. If we want to go to uni that badly, we should pay for it ourselves because times have changed with AI and we just need more tradies. That’s what I would say if I hated good things. Three years of fees free, promised by Labour, was designed to address Read more...

Editorial: Texts That I Got This Week

Posted 9:28am Sunday 26th July 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Last week, I committed to using a flip phone for 7 days. I will start with the cons. Firstly, I hadn’t realised how much I was relying on social media for a sense of connectivity, or parasocialisation. I found myself wondering when the days had gotten so long, and so lonely. Secondly, there Read more...

The Algorithm Made Me Do It

Posted 9:25am Sunday 26th July 2026 by Heeni Koero Te Rerenoa (Sky)

If there’s one thing a Ngāpuhi likes, it’s arguing a case. Unfortunately for everyone else, I’ve always got one.  There was a time when personality was something you developed. Somewhere along the way, we outsourced our personalities to the algorithm. Nobody simply Read more...

Better Cones and Gardens: Exchange Students

Posted 11:50am Sunday 19th July 2026 by Jonathan McCabe

Rejoice! The next shipment of exchange students has arrived in Ōtepoti. Filling the UniFlat beds of those who conquered the city before them, this group has got a lot to live up to. Being heavily involved with Otago University’s outdoor clubs, I find myself widely intertwined with the Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Tyre Slasher

Posted 11:45am Sunday 19th July 2026 by Lady Pain Grey

I was in my second-year of university, and had just broken up with my longterm boyfriend. Heartbroken and numb to pretty much everything, I was keen to figure out what university hookup culture was all about, given I’d been dating my man since year 13. The unlucky guy who caught my Read more...

OUSA Exec: Daniel Leamy & Kamesha Jones

Posted 11:40am Sunday 19th July 2026 by Daniel Leamy

The second semester is well and truly underway, and OUSA has got some big things coming up! With Re:Ori behind us, we are looking toward candidate debates and voter enrollment for the general election, hundreds of club AGMs, and our very own OUSA elections in September. Plus, many more free brekkies Read more...

Editorial: I Will Go 7 Days With a Flip Phone

Posted 11:36am Sunday 19th July 2026 by Hanna Varrs

I feel weird. I think it’s probably some combination of seeing my brother for the first time in a long time and being in my last ever second semester, but I feel that every day is going too fast now. At the time of writing, I have just become eligible to graduate with my law degree. Nearly Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 15 2026

Posted 9:38am Saturday 18th July 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS 1 WELCOME 6 LILAC 8 EROS 9 MERYL STREEP 11 BUS 12 HER 13 TREASON 15 MILO 17 TWIGGY 18 KAPUT 20 BENEVOLENT 23 KITE 26 DAINTIEST 28 PANCAKE 29 ROCKY 31 HYDRO  32 OLIVE DOWN 1 WEETBIX 2 LOOKSHARP 3 MARE 4 VIOLET 5 LOVE 7 CARNATION 9 MARMITE 10 PANSY 14 Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 15 2026

Posted 9:31am Saturday 18th July 2026 by The Orb

Capricorn Stop overbooking yourself before you have a public meltdown in Central Library. Nobody expects you to be a CEO, and burning out before midterms will tank your GPA. Pace yourself, breathe, and accept you don't need to make millions. Yet.  Your Greek God: Hermes Ares The Read more...

Booze Review: Hard Rated Orange

Posted 9:08am Saturday 18th July 2026 by Swig60

Welcome back pissers and shitters, and a happy international Re:Ori! We hope everyone had a good break, except for all you Aucklanders who went to Bali. Fuck you guys, we are not reviewing your shitty Bintangs. Instead, here’s Hard Rated Orange. Tasting Notes  Yep! It’s Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 14 2026

Posted 4:07pm Saturday 11th July 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS: 1 - Subscribers 6 - Relic 7 - Unspoiled 9 - Ewok 10 - Empire State 13 - Gingerbread man 17 - Excess 18 - Snap 19 - Smoking 20 - Outed 21 - Kobe 22 - Shuttles 23 - Gotham DOWN: 1 - Sorcery 2 - Skink 3 - Bonsai 4 - Spokesman 5 - Brexit 8 - Aimless 11 - Arming 12 - Read more...

Proctology 33

Posted 4:04pm Saturday 11th July 2026 by Hanna Varrs

When we tried to schedule our next meeting over the break, Critic Te Ārohi was imagining that the Proctor would decline it in favour of sipping piña coladas for a sacred few weeks. It was not the case. Instead, he was all too keen to get our ear, and give us some Proctorly Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The one that got away… For three years

Posted 4:00pm Saturday 11th July 2026 by Lady Gag-me

Everyone remembers their Big University Romance. I can sum up mine up with a few pretty sad stats. 3 years. Thousands of texts. And one lousy kiss – at the airport, of all places. We met in halls, where it feels like everyone is simultaneously trying to reinvent themselves and also find Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 14 2026

Posted 3:57pm Saturday 11th July 2026 by The Orb

Cancer This week it’s time to let your hair down and embrace some cultish behaviour. Don’t sacrifice the family pet goat, but skipping around a beach bonfire while cross-faded with friends might do the trick. Your Otago canon event: Never being satisfied by your degree Read more...

Joint Statement On The Legislation (Definition Of A Man and Woman Bill) Amendment Bill

Posted 3:28pm Saturday 11th July 2026 by OUSA Exec

The OUSA Executive and UniQ oppose the Gender (Definitions of Man and Woman)  amendment bill, and call for it to be withdrawn over the dehumanisation wielded against transgender, non-binary, takatāpui and intersex people.   Everyone deserves to live a life of dignity where we Read more...

Editorial: Everything You Missed Over The Break

Posted 3:24pm Saturday 11th July 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Welcome back. I missed you! In the spirit of our census results coming out, I asked you guys (via the @criticmag story) what you had all been missing about Ōtepoti while you were away for the break.  April misses hearing the clocktower chime. Ryan misses Leith Liquor. A couple of Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 13 2026

Posted 12:25pm Saturday 23rd May 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS: 1- Daniel Radcliffe 6 - Influencers 8 - KPH 10 - Karyon 11  - Enraged 13 - Topical 14 - Methodology 19 - Gossips 22 - Satchel 23 - Boundless 24 - Scold DOWN: 1 - Daniel Leamy 2 - Exhuming 3 - Desecration 4 - IRS 5 - Enthralled 7 - Naked 9  - Innit 12 - Read more...

Proctology - 31

Posted 12:24pm Saturday 23rd May 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Critic Te Ārohi hasn’t met with Proctor Dave Scott in a while now, but he certainly hasn’t forgotten about us. With the recent snap in the weather, we were more than happy to go and pay him a visit to get out of the kind of cold that chills you to the bone.  Upon arrival, we Read more...

Emo Boy: A Night To Forget

Posted 12:05pm Saturday 23rd May 2026 by Chappell Moan

One fateful night in 2025, I had the worst sex of my life.  I was just beginning my third year of uni (my first one single), and had finally decided I was ready to get back out there. I’d been snapping this guy from Tinder for a few weeks, and was out in town when he messaged me asking Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 13 2026

Posted 12:02pm Saturday 23rd May 2026 by The Orb

Capricorn You've been running on feet that are one step away from giving out from beneath you, and everyone’s concerned with the amount of caffeine you have been downing lately. Paired with your “I’ll sleep after my exams” attitude, you should be careful and sleep off Read more...

Editorial: DRAMA ALERT: Tabloid is back, baby!

Posted 12:00pm Saturday 23rd May 2026 by Molly Smith-Soppet

Welcome to the Tabloid Issue! This one is always the best. Tabloid lets us be silly, dramatic, nosy, and unserious in the way that student journalism is made for. My first exposure to the wonderful world of print magazines was through my Nana’s Women’s Weekly, Women's Day, and Read more...

Booze Review: Purple Goannas

Posted 11:37am Saturday 23rd May 2026 by Swig60

This week, we take you back in time to a prehistoric land. When reptiles ruled, Pint Night pints cost $5, and the first-year was fees free. You know something's been around forever when you get a nod of approval from some bloke's dad while carrying two boxes home. That’s Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 12 2026

Posted 11:55am Sunday 17th May 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS: 1 - Mortal Kombat 7 - Brass 10 - Moss 11 - Assembly Lines 12 - Fender 13 - Vision 14 - Overrun 15 - Advantage 20 - Sony 22 - Ulysses 23 - Overkill 24 - Luigi 28 - Basin 29 - Notated 31 - Aviator 32 - Container 33 - Bingo 34 - Candidate DOWN: 1 - Mummification 2 - Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 12 2026

Posted 11:46am Sunday 17th May 2026 by The Orb

Capricorn With exams around the corner, your anxiety has been running high. Although patronising to hear, try to take a minute and actually breathe. Pinky promise that it’ll be easy to remember the things you're trying to shove into your mushy brain if you’re a bit calmer. Your Read more...

Editorial: Dear Otago

Posted 11:09am Sunday 17th May 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Otago, as I write this, I sit in an airport. I’m miles away from you, and I can’t help but notice that the colours seem duller and the sky less open without you near. Laughter seems less genuine, and all I can think about is coming home to you. No matter how damp the soil, or how wet the Read more...

From the Pātaka - Issue 11

Posted 11:25am Sunday 10th May 2026 by Brady Simeon

You can tell what time of year it is by what people are carrying. Shoes in one hand, laptop in the other, everything else tucked in where it fits, moving from one place to the next without really stopping. Within TRM, the volleyball tournament has just passed, Te Huinga Tauira musters are underway, Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Mummy's Boy

Posted 10:12am Sunday 10th May 2026 by Lady Pain Grey

It all started on a warm summer’s night in Australia. It was Hottest 100 day – a national treasure over the ditch. It was the last big effort before uni started up again, and celebration was well and truly in session. To the pub we went! With a solid foundation of day drinking laid, my Read more...

Letters: Issue 11 2026

Posted 10:09am Sunday 10th May 2026 by Critic

Dear Critic, I’m sorry but seriously what the fuck is wrong with people in central library this year?? Why are the suicide pods absolutely filthy like  how hard is it to clean up after yourself? And all the fucking freshers talking so loudly about hubs and physics it’s a library Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 11 2026

Posted 10:07am Sunday 10th May 2026 by The Orb

Gemini As a potent full moon takes its effect on you this week, you're going to feel drawn to address the hidden cravings you've been pushing to the back of your mind. Acknowledge these desires before the energy causes disruption in your life. Flatmate stereotype: The free spirit – Read more...

OUSA Exec: Fergus Parks

Posted 10:04am Sunday 10th May 2026 by Fergus Parks

How do you do, fellow youths? OUSA’s post-graduate representative (resident UNC) here, using up ink on a column you don't read. And you know what? Good on ya! Exercise that free will, read me or don't. You think I care? Well… maybe a little. Still, I’ll try to earn a Read more...

Editorial: It’s All In Your Head

Posted 10:01am Sunday 10th May 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Hi everyone, Welcome to Issue 11. We literally have two issues left for the semester, which I think is genuinely insane. How time flies!  I’m pleased to say that this issue seems to have a bit of a theme, though it was completely unplanned. Our chunkiest piece is Jesse and Read more...

Booze Review: Fiji Dry

Posted 8:04pm Friday 8th May 2026 by Swig60

It’s monsoon season, so it’s time to get wet. Actually, never mind – this isn’t Moaningful Confessions, that's on the next page. This week, Swig60 set sail (not to that island) and somehow ended up stranded with a box of Fiji Dry and very few plans beyond “see what Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 10 2026

Posted 3:01pm Sunday 3rd May 2026 by The Orb

Pisces The world sometimes feels like it’s working against you. You apply for 100 jobs, and only get one interview – you’re scared it’s your destiny to be unemployed. A panic masters might be in your future. Surely the job market will have recovered by then. Go to study Read more...

Crossword Answers - Issue 10 2026

Posted 2:50pm Sunday 3rd May 2026 by The Quizzler

ACROSS: 1 - Karl Urban 4 - Ned Kelly 9 - Labyrinths 10 - Bitcoin 11 - Rockhopper 13 - Skim 14 - Elongation 17 - Arizona 19 - Doggo 21 - Margot Robbie 22 - USSR 24 - Obviously 25 - Ignition 27 - Versailles 28 - Mad Max 29 - Search Warrant 30 - Debt Down: 1 - Killer whale 2 - Read more...

Editorial: Stop Being Mean To The BSA

Posted 2:39pm Sunday 3rd May 2026 by Hanna Varrs

If it isn’t obvious, media is something near and dear to my heart. It’s my life blood – I enjoy the chaos of it and the role it plays in keeping others accountable. That’s why I was interested to hear that the Broadcasting Standards Authority (BSA) and its associated Read more...

From the Pātaka

Posted 1:33pm Sunday 26th April 2026 by Brady Simeon

The semester has properly settled into its pace now. Calendars are filling, deadlines are approaching, and the whare is rarely quiet. Before things tighten up even more, we are back in the pātaka, clearing the shelves and checking what has been happening and what is coming up. Right now, Read more...

Proctology – 30

Posted 1:31pm Sunday 26th April 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Critic Te Ārohi was a little uncertain about whether the Proctor would be keen to meet once again, given our artistic interpretation of him. However, despite him thinking that the Proctology column would have “no readership interest” and be “dropped like a hot pie”, we Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Truck Stop Tinder

Posted 1:13pm Sunday 26th April 2026 by Lady Pain Grey

At the end of the academic year, one must take stock. Papers passed: 7. Extra-curriculars: doing them. Friends made: heaps. Huzz: 0. A big, fat, embarrassing zero. After the last few students trickled out of Dunners for the summer, I sat through my first few sexless weeks doing the maths. If I Read more...

Horoscopes: Issue 9 2026

Posted 1:09pm Sunday 26th April 2026 by The Orb

Aries You're gonna go to a pub quiz this week, and feel like an absolute genius when you get the most random question right. Watch out though, cause at the rate you're drinking, you're going to wake up with the fattest hangover in history on a Wednesday or something.  Your Monster Read more...

OUSA Exec: Kamesha Jones

Posted 1:07pm Sunday 26th April 2026 by Kamesha Jones

I spend far too much time on Instagram reels. It’s true – though I wish it wasn’t. And while I’ve now cut myself off from the addictive political whirlpool run by an ‘unbiased algorithm’, it is truly hard to escape from politics online. Even true before-bedtime Read more...

Editorial: 32 Pages and Hustle Culture

Posted 1:05pm Sunday 26th April 2026 by Hanna Varrs

Christmas has come early for you lot, because I’m pleased to announce on behalf of the Critic Te Ārohi team that the mag will shift to printing 32-pages per week, effective semester 2. The decision has been made alongside OUSA. Shifting to 32 pages gives us a net gain of 12 pages per Read more...