Archive

Rory And His Forest Garden

Posted 5:55pm Thursday 11th July 2019 by Oscar Francis

On the North End of George Street, in an orange brick house bedecked with vines and separated from the street by a row of feijoa bushes, lives Rory and his forest garden. The George Street Orchard has been ex-Otago student Rory’s pet project for the past ten years. He invites me to try a Read more...

Kaka Vs. Kea: Dunedin Botanic Gardens Edition

Posted 5:53pm Thursday 11th July 2019 by Oscar Francis

There are three, and only three, reasons that a student might visit this fair city’s botanic gardens. Firstly, drinking in a tree in an attempt to mimic an introduced marsupial. Secondly, trashing the fountains in the Mediterranean Garden by partying on the eve of a national tragedy. The third Read more...

When Opportunity Knocks

Posted 5:50pm Thursday 11th July 2019 by Sophia Carter Peters

A small town gal in the big city exercises her gosh-darn given right to hunt for bargains on the mean streets of Dunedin, while giving the lowdown on what’s good, what’s bad and what’s ugly.   Orphan’s Aid Op Shop Quiet and small-ish, on the far side of the Read more...

Busting Dunedin’s Myths

Posted 11:30pm Thursday 4th July 2019 by Sophia Carter Peters

Dunedin. It seems that there is always some kind of local lore or big claim being made about this humble little city, usually by wheezing older men at the pub, or by drunk postgrads who believe that four years of living here has made them sheriffs of this here town. Sick of blindly believing the Read more...

Life After Health Sci

Posted 11:24pm Thursday 4th July 2019 by Esme Hall

It was August 2017 and Nick was getting med-worthy grades in Health Sciences First Year (HSFY). But he was not loving life. “I got quite anxious and didn’t feel confident in myself and my abilities. I started thinking I wouldn’t be a good doctor,” he said. Stress turned to Read more...

A Satanic Setup

Posted 6:27pm Thursday 23rd May 2019 by Owen Clarke

“The night is dark, and full of terrors,” whispers Leroy. “Fuck off, Leroy,” you respond. “I’m tired of hearing about that Game of Thrones bullshit.” Your group of friends crosses the field, dark clouds massing above, blocking out the stars and Read more...

A Herbal Hellscape

Posted 6:17pm Thursday 23rd May 2019 by Owen Clarke

It’s common knowledge that humans don’t know everything. We might have figured out how to make handheld phones with cameras so that we can take pictures of our junk and send them to people on the other side of the world, but there’s a lot we still don’t know. This is Read more...

Cultivate Me

Posted 6:12pm Thursday 23rd May 2019 by Phillip Plant

Like many people, I have struggled to discover my place in the world. One day some friends were discussing the Manson murders, which provoked an epiphany. I would indeed find my place … in a cult. I immediately set about attempting to join a cult which is defined following Read more...

Taking It To The Grave

Posted 6:08pm Thursday 23rd May 2019 by Sophia Carter Peters

Southern Cemetery: Dunedin’s first major cemetery opened in 1858, and you can see the wear in the headstones. Perched atop a hill overlooking the large flat basin that makes up most of the town centre, the dearly departed have a lovely sweeping view of the city they died in. With five main Read more...

How I Became the Most Powerful Male Wiccan in North Dunedin

Posted 6:06pm Thursday 23rd May 2019 by Charlie O’Mannin

In the depths of time before the world came into being (2001), in a dark and distant land (the American Midwest), a book was made. This book was called “Wicca Spellcraft for Men” and I bought a copy of it from a library sale for a single smackeroo. After all, I was a man, and I was Read more...

I Went To A Men’s Rights Summit And They Tried To Recruit Me

Posted 11:39pm Thursday 16th May 2019 by Oscar Francis

Why would anyone go to a men’s summit, in an age of online self help videos and feminism, let alone bother to host one? Critic decided it would be fun to try and find out what happens at these meetings, but as it turns out there was very little fun to be had. What follows is the gruelling true Read more...

I Sat in the Library and Reviewed Some Textbooks for Fun on a Friday Night

Posted 10:50pm Thursday 16th May 2019 by Owen Clarke

There’s not a whole lot of positive shit I can say about academic textbooks. They’re heavy, boring, and smell like an old folks home. That said, I did enjoy wanking to page 44 of our Biology textbook back in Year 7 and Year 8, and maybe a few times in Year 9. Aside from that, and the Read more...

To Catch a Predator: Leaving Stuff Unattended in Various Libraries

Posted 9:11pm Thursday 9th May 2019 by James Joblin

Friends, the festivities of exam season are almost upon us and at this time we should give thanks for how blessed we are with our University. Believe it or not, some people will never get to live the classic Otago experience of watching a couch aflame with a mate’s shoe in one hand, a can Read more...

Too Much of a Good Thing: Why Students Get Breast Reductions

Posted 9:05pm Thursday 9th May 2019 by Erin Gourley

“I found my old bra the other day and I could put it over my face. Each boob was bigger than my head,” Dominique told me. She had a breast reduction when she was 17. "It was the best thing I ever did." Big boobs are seen as an attractive feature, like having long legs or Read more...

Big Hits: Critic Tackles Super Rugby

Posted 9:00pm Thursday 9th May 2019 by Oscar Francis

Fucking bagpipes. We walk past an ominous circle of tartan, practising on the tarmac like something out of Children of Men. “Jump in,” Amber the contracted PR person for the fast food restaurant says. Okay. We hop on the back of a modified golf buggy shaped like a chicken bucket. It Read more...

The Great Critic Hall Food Review

Posted 7:52pm Thursday 2nd May 2019 by Critic

Over the past few weeks Critic has been sneaking into halls to review their food. We are fully aware that you can just buy meals at most of the halls, but our lives were getting dull and we needed some adrenaline to make us feel alive again. Also the Critic budget has been exhausted of late by Read more...

Meeting the Trainers of Dunedin: the Pokémon Go Capital of New Zealand

Posted 7:15pm Thursday 2nd May 2019 by Sinead Gill

Creatures? Fights? Long walks along Studentville? No, we’re not talking about Castle on a Saturday. We’re talking Pokémon Go, baby. I used to think my flatmate was sneaking out at midnight for shameful ciggies. It took weeks before they confessed that they were, in fact, doing Read more...

Ranking the Rocks in the Geology Museum on their Chakra Alignment

Posted 7:14pm Thursday 2nd May 2019 by Fox Meyer

Geology. The study of the terrestrial, of rocks and minerals, the earthy matter of the planet we all know and love. Yet what if this terrestrial study was in fact more extra… terrestrial? The rocks - minerals, actually - housed in the geology building are stored behind ancient glass panes Read more...

Critic Goes to Hyde

Posted 9:34pm Thursday 25th April 2019 by Owen Clarke

April 13. The infamous Hyde Street Party started off for me with a bit of a whimper. Our photographer, Aiman, and I were shown around, stone sober, by someone from OUSA, along with a bunch of other old-fart media guys from around town. It was 9:15am and nothing had kicked off yet - nobody was really Read more...

Critic’s Guide to the Best Food Trucks Around Uni

Posted 9:29pm Thursday 25th April 2019 by Erin Gourley

A restaurant with wheels. Food without a consistent location. Cuisine sans frontiers.  A trailer filled with a range of hot cooking implements that must create some kind of health and safety hazard. As much as I love food trucks, they’re a bit weird. Ordering from a food truck is like Read more...