Dog food packaging is designed to target your pet through you. Buddy doesn’t care about buzz words like ‘succulent’ and ‘delicate’, he just wants a good feed. Ignoring how cancerous the ingredients probably are, Critic investigated the difference in appearance, aroma, mouthfeel and taste differences between the most budget and the most deluxe looking dog foods available in your local supermarkets. Across our culinary journey, Critic learned that finely ground up bones seem to be a key ingredient in almost every dog food and that (spoiler!!) higher advertising quality does not necessarily equate with higher eating quality. However, every dog is different and finding the affordable food options that makes your dog say “Mmm, outstanding, thank you” may be a journey, embarked on together, for a lifetime (or at least their short lifetime).
Value Casserole with 5 Meats
Appearance: Blocky, mucousy. 4/10.
Aroma: Sweet pudding. 6/10.
Mouthfeel: Sandy. 2/10.
Taste: Could not identify any of the 5 meats. 3/10.
Aura: Like a scratch behind the ear. 10/10.
Score Total: 5/10 (C-)
Gourmet Lamb and Venison Banquet
Appearance: Little chunk blocks. 4/10.
Aroma: Smells like cat food. 5/10.
Mouthfeel: Rubbery: 4/10.
Taste: Initial flavour made me say “Eugh!”, followed by a distinct bitter moment. 1/10.
Aura: A satisfying hour of howling at sirens. 10/10.
Score Total: 4.8/10 (Fail D)
Value Chicken Dog Roll
Appearance: Monotonous. 4/10.
Aroma: Nostalgic. 6/10.
Mouthfeel: Gritty. 2/10.
Taste: Bland. 3/10.
Aura: Quivering chihuahua. 10/10.
Score Total: 5/10 (C-)
Butch White Label Chicken Dog Roll (Kelp and Omega 3 Enriched)
Appearance: The belgium in the lunch box of the child with the transparent skin. 5/10.
Aroma: Boiled. 4/10.
Mouthfeel: Smooth. 5/10.
Taste: Peppery. 6/10.
Aura: Like curling up in front of a warm fire and falling asleep. 10/10.
Score Total: 6/10 (C+)
Pams Dog Kibbles Meaty Beef Flavour
Appearance: Delightfully round. 7/10.
Aroma: Chicken Crimpy Shapes. 9/10.
Mouthfeel: Like a cracker made of bones. 4/10.
Taste: The aroma gave me false hope. 3/10.
Aura: Gave me the zoomies. 10/10.
Score Total: 6.6/10 (B-)
MyDog Dog Kibbles with Gourmet Beef and Succulent Meat Pieces
Appearance: Vibrant and colourful. 8/10.
Aroma: Classic. 5/10.
Mouthfeel: The ‘succulent meat pieces’ looked like the rest of the biscuits but were unexpectedly soft and pillowy, and not in a good way. The rest of the biscuits were crunchy as Nature intended. 3/10.
Taste: The ‘succulent meat pieces’ were rank. The rest of the biscuits were relievingly bland. 2/10.
Aura: Car ride home from the beach, too tired to stick head out the window. 10/10.
Score Total: 5.6/10 (C)
Essentials Dog Food with Chicken
Appearance: A savoury mousse. 2/10.
Aroma: Not unpleasant. 6/10.
Mouthfeel: Softened bones in a light, airy bed. 4/10.
Taste: Sudden urge to vomit, but not quite sure why. 1/10.
Aura: That feel when you get away with eating the cat’s vomit. 10/10.
Score Total: 4.6/10 (Fail D)
Gourmet Chicken in a Delicate Gravy
Appearance: Light chunks. 4/10.
Aroma: Strong, but again, not unpleasant. 6/10.
Mouthfeel: Like the texture of all the other dog foods blended together and recompacted. 4/10.
Taste: Could be worse. 4/10.
Aura: A dog sitting on top of another dog, and both are happy. 10/10.
Score Total: 5.6/10 (C)
Pams, you’ve done it again. Clear winner.