Archive

Booze Review: Heineken 0.0%

Posted 3:41pm Saturday 20th July 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

Drinking a non-alcoholic beer for the first time is a strange experience. It tastes like beer, smells like beer, makes you crave nicotine like beer, yet there’s something missing. It’s like drinking out of a week-old luke-warm keg that has long lost any sense of its carbonation. Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 15

Posted 3:22pm Saturday 20th July 2024 by Critic

Aquarius It's time to decide if you will continue to sell your soul to please others. Life can be a little bit scary at times, but so can you. Make sure to stand your ground and not let yourself wonder if you were silent or if you were silenced. If you were a TikTok trend: Who TF did I marry Read more...

Mi Goreng Graduate: Connor's Nachos

Posted 3:19pm Saturday 20th July 2024 by Connor Moffat

Ruby’s on vacay, so design intern Connor swooped in to save the day with his “banging” nacho recipe! Nachos are a classic go-to student meal, perfect for the colder weather for a quick and tasty feed. To make it vegetarian, simply swap the mince for more veggies such as carrots and Read more...

Why I’m Doing Dry July

Posted 3:04pm Saturday 20th July 2024 by Nina Brown

I’m doing Dry July. And it’s been kind of… nice. When I’d thought about doing Dry July and how it might be a nice break, it was a small shock to realise that I couldn’t remember the last time I’d gone so long without a drink. And that bothered Read more...

Debatable: Is Winter a Good Season?

Posted 3:00pm Saturday 20th July 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For The change in season rolls by unnoticed in the depths of first-sem exam hell, but with calmer times ahead we can stop and Read more...

Do It Your Fucking Self: Defrost Your Windscreen

Posted 2:54pm Saturday 20th July 2024 by Sam Smith-Soppet

These days, it's far too cold to walk to campus from Harbour Terrace. You don’t want to take the bus (because that involves waiting) so you decide to take your car which, let's be real, has no WOF and is probably due for a service – but that's a problem for Future You! Given Read more...

Introducing your Critic Bachelor: Joel Tebbs

Posted 8:27pm Saturday 13th July 2024 by Hanna Varrs

Age: 21 (turning 22 soon!) Occupation: DeliveryEasy Carbon Accountant Star sign: Leo (swoon) Degree: BSc in Energy Management, BCom in Finance  Celebrity Crush: “I lowkey don’t have one.” That’s a green flag, if we’ve ever heard one  His friends Read more...

Debatable: Should Students Demand a Box on Return?

Posted 8:16pm Saturday 13th July 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For So you got on the piss and lost your wallet. The only person at fault here is you. You should learn to take better care Read more...

Local Produce: Ani Saafa

Posted 7:05pm Saturday 13th July 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Ani Saafa is the brainchild of prominent Dunedin musicians Logan Edwards (he/him) and Stanley Barbazon (he/him). Supported by Jakira Brophy (she/her) and Erik Dekker (he/him) on bass and drums respectively, the indie-pop-grunge band has made a great impact on the scene with their new EP Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 14

Posted 6:44pm Saturday 13th July 2024 by Critic

Aquarius You need some flaws to stop seeming like an absolute bot. The new moon moving into Cancer holds a metaphorical mirror up to your face and says, “It’s your time to take a big long look at the person you are and stop being so damn perfect.”  New semester, new habit: Read more...

Editorial: Introducing the Critic Bachelor

Posted 6:42pm Saturday 13th July 2024 by Nina Brown

Welcome back, everyone! I hope you’ve all had a very well earned and restful semester break. It’s been a bit of a ghost town in Dunedin with most people taking advantage of the break to ditch the frosty flats and either hit the ski slopes or your parents’ pantries and power bills. Read more...

Booze Review: Steinlager Classic

Posted 6:01pm Saturday 13th July 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

It’s been argued that Steinlager is New Zealand's beer. It's what defines us as Kiwis compared to the god awful beers that Australia produces. Steinlager is like Speights' older cousin who lives in Auckland; a bit more classy, but punishing whenever they speak. After tasting, we Read more...

Mi Goreng Graduate: Fish Cake

Posted 5:57pm Saturday 13th July 2024 by Ruby Hudson

Serves: 4 Time: 1 hr Price: $ Difficulty: 3/5 I don't know about you, but I am always on the hunt for a cheap source of protein. Tinned fish is an affordable and tasty way to get a bit of variation and protein into your diet. This week's fish cake recipe uses tinned tuna in a way Read more...

Local Produce: Snapper

Posted 8:16pm Sunday 26th May 2024 by Jordan Irvine

For New Zealand Music Month and for the 40th anniversary of Radio One, Local Produce will cover four iconic Dunedin bands by way of interviewing a member of each selected band and asking them about their legacy.  Snapper aren’t as widely known in the “Dunedin Sound” Read more...

Booze Review: Export Gold

Posted 8:09pm Sunday 26th May 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

I once drunkenly asked a bartender if they had any Speight’s, to which they replied “We only have good beer.” Turns out all they had on tap was Export Gold. Critic begs to fucking differ. Now, Export Gold is many things but a good beer it definitely is not. While the drop Read more...

Debatable: Should the Uni turn campus grass into a dairy farm?

Posted 8:05pm Sunday 26th May 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For I cannot think of a convincing downside to introducing intensive agricultural grazing on Union Lawn. As we are all well Read more...

Takeaways: Week 13

Posted 7:37pm Sunday 26th May 2024 by Critic

SOMETHING TO WATCH ‘Fully conscious baby’ TikToks The Internet’s latest obsession is a baby who really wants to go to the Four Seasons Hotel in Orlando, and you either get it or you don’t. Everyone is in awe? fear? of its mysterious cognitive abilities, and there are Read more...

Horoscope: Week 13

Posted 7:21pm Sunday 26th May 2024 by Critic

Aquarius Get out of Dunedin. The city air is not agreeing with you as of late and stretching your legs in a place where everyone around you isn't a uni student can help alleviate the scary’s you feel all day, every day. Take a trip, even if it is just out to Milton.  Study Read more...

Editorial: Read the Magazine, Goddammit

Posted 7:17pm Sunday 26th May 2024 by Nina Brown

Screw it, it’s the Tabloid issue. If there’s any week I’m allowed to be petty, it’s this one (it’s also the last print night of the semester and I’m a shiraz deep). I’m fed up being harassed about the crossword – part of the magazine I didn’t Read more...

Local Produce: Look Blue, Go Purple

Posted 10:25pm Sunday 19th May 2024 by Jordan Irvine

For New Zealand Music Month and for the 40th anniversary of Radio One, Local Produce will cover four iconic Dunedin bands by way of interviewing a member of each selected band and asking them about their legacy.  Look Blue, Go Purple (or simply LBGP) is the iconic all-female 5 piece from Read more...

Booze Reviews: The Yardie

Posted 10:22pm Sunday 19th May 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

21st season has officially arrived, and with it comes the means for celebration. You can’t really do anything new when you turn 21 but you’re officially an adult now. For third-years, this means that you no longer have to compete to be the biggest wounder on Castle Street; you can now Read more...

Debatable: What’s the best Pint Night venue?

Posted 10:19pm Sunday 19th May 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. U-Bar It might be scummy and it might be crowded, but isn’t that really why we love U-Bar? Recently, there’ve Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 12

Posted 2:56pm Sunday 19th May 2024 by Critic

Aquarius Uranus is drawing you to social activism and meaningful connections this week. Check out what cool Facebook events are on and get involved – you never know who you'll meet. Actually go to the weird raves and slam poetry sessions you click ‘interested in’ to seem cool Read more...

Editorial: Vote ‘Yes’ to Sexy Garfield

Posted 2:55pm Sunday 19th May 2024 by Nina Brown

The OUSA referendum is coming up. Referendums are essentially one of the biggest ways students can influence the policies and stance of OUSA. Not that any of you noticed, but a couple weeks ago the OUSA exec were inviting students to submit questions that will be put to the student body on May 27th Read more...

He Whakapapa Māori, He Māori Koe

Posted 5:20pm Saturday 11th May 2024 by Gemella Reynolds-Hatem

Nau mai ki Ōtākou Whakaihu Waka!  Kia Ora e te whānau,   He uri tēnei nō ngāi Tahu, Ngāi Tahu poutini, waitaha, ngāti Mamoe, syria me lebanon anō hoki Ko au te tumuaki takirua o Te Rōpū Māori i tēnei Read more...

Local Produce: Bored Games

Posted 5:15pm Saturday 11th May 2024 by Jordan Irvine

For New Zealand Music Month and for the 40th anniversary of Radio One, Local Produce will cover four iconic Dunedin bands by way of interviewing a member of each selected band and asking them about their legacy. While some only see it as a jumping off point for Shayne Carter’s career, many Read more...

Debatable: Should animal testing be banned?

Posted 5:13pm Saturday 11th May 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For  Animal testing dates back to BC times, and has led to numerous medical and biological advancements, many of them Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The Chamber of Secrets

Posted 4:38pm Saturday 11th May 2024 by Critic

Going to the doctor about sex-related stuff can be scary, and quite embarrassing sometimes. But do not fret, I have a story to share in solidarity to encourage you all to go get your genitals checked if they are exhibiting strange symptoms. I was experiencing bleeding with penetration for a few Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 11

Posted 4:35pm Saturday 11th May 2024 by Critic

Aquarius Aquarius, this week you will reconnect with someone you haven't thought about for a long time. This person will be the Tom to your Jerry, even if just for a night. Remember to just go with the flow and you won't be led astray. Scent of the week: Dior Sauvage mixed with 3-day-old Read more...

Editorial: Popping My Capping Cherry

Posted 4:24pm Saturday 11th May 2024 by Nina Brown

Let’s get this out of the way: I’ve never been to the Capping Show. After talking to cappers for this issue, though, that’s something I really regret.  The Capping Show has been around for 130 years. It’s soldiered on through world wars, pandemics, and 33 seasons of Read more...

Booze Review: White Claw

Posted 3:25pm Saturday 11th May 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

The world’s most patriotic drink is now in Ōtepoti Dunedin, meaning the common breatha will be turning their hats backwards, putting on the loudest tech house, and getting absolutely frat-boy wasted.  For booze reviews, this is like your first child being born, marrying the love Read more...

Local Produce: The Clean

Posted 8:21pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by Jordan Irvine

For New Zealand Music Month and for the 40th anniversary of Radio 1, Local Produce will cover four iconic Dunedin bands by way of interviewing a member of each selected band and asking them about their legacy.  In a 1981 interview, David Kilgour, co-founder of The Clean, was asked if there Read more...

Debatable: Should you date someone with opposing political views?

Posted 8:13pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For When you’re in a relationship with someone, you don’t want to be the same person. Being the same person looks Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 10

Posted 7:49pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by Critic

Aquarius This week you’ll feel a sense of calm washing over you, like lapping waves. It may be you, or it could be the bag of ket you stumbled upon. Keep your head in the gutter and you never know what you might find.  Patronus: Hector's Dolphin Pisces Pisces, just because Read more...

Introducing Your Political Rep

Posted 7:47pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by Liam White

Kia ora, everyone! I’m Liam and I’m your OUSA Political Rep for 2024. For those of you who were here last year, I was the guy with the shit campaign posters in the bathrooms (don’t forget to follow @ousaexec and @liam_ousa _pols on Instagram for updates). I get asked a lot what I Read more...

Editorial: The new logo DOESN’T look like bananas

Posted 7:40pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by Nina Brown

The Uni launched its new brand last week. Predictably, with the news came a parade of trolls snarling and gnashing their teeth at the “woke” and “tokenistic” new tohu (symbol) and ikoa Māori (name). The usual protocol would be to sit back and let them tire themselves out Read more...

ChatGOTH: The Flatmate

Posted 6:57pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by ChatGOTH

Hey ChatGoth,  Long time listener, first time caller here. I have a bit of a problem with a flatmate who brings things home from adventures, whilst some of these things are rather amusing, others are more outright strange. One of these things is logs, just cut up bits of tree. He hasn't Read more...

Booze Review: Bavaria 8.6 Original Holland Beer

Posted 6:55pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

Bavaria 8.6 Original Holland Beer didn’t come to fuck around. Straight off the plane from the Netherlands, this wolf-clad bevvy is your new one-minute ticket to getting fucked.  Referred to simply as ‘8.6’, this devil-in-a-can is bound to get you silly with its outrageous Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Halloween Rendezvous

Posted 6:43pm Sunday 5th May 2024 by Critic

It was Halloween. I got all dressed and ready into my costume, and boy did I feel sexy. Pairing that with many drinks later at a Halloween party, I thought I was hot shit. You know when you are feeling yourself so much that you just want someone else's hands all over you? Just me? Okay fine. Read more...

Local Produce: Vagina Dry

Posted 10:32pm Friday 26th April 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Vagina Dry are the new leaders of Ōtepoti Riot Grrrl music. Fronted by El (she/they) on vocals and guitar, she spits forth a political and intersectional feminist message in their lyrics. Backed by Caleb (he/him) on drums and Reef (he/him) on bass, in a short amount of time they have become one Read more...

Debatable: Should students prioritise saving?

Posted 10:12pm Friday 26th April 2024 by Annabel Rhodes

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For: Annabel Rhodes When students think of frugality, we often think of two minute noodles and timing our flatmates in the Read more...

Booze Reviews: Coruba Raspberry, Grapefruit & Soda

Posted 10:02pm Friday 26th April 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

Coruba is meant to be tall, dark and handsome; a drink to remind you of the tropics, or of anywhere you can reliably hang your washing outside to dry. Coruba Raspberry, Grapefruit & Soda is anything but that. The drink is, in fact, short, white and strange. It’s like that one mate that Read more...

Takeaways: Week 9

Posted 9:57pm Friday 26th April 2024 by Critic

SOMETHING TO WATCH Scarfies film Arguably the film that took the cult from Dunedin student culture and put it next to classic, Scarfies encompasses the student experience: a shithouse flat, copious alcohol consumption, drugs, kidnappings (maybe not this one but shit happens yk), and rounds it Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The Rubber Raxxer

Posted 9:19pm Friday 26th April 2024 by Critic

I had been talking to Latin (easiest decoded code name ever) for maybe a month before my return to the glorious city of Auckland, but nothing had come of it – at least not yet. Upon landing, I promptly received a text from a high school friend inviting me to go with her to town. Lo and behold, Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 9

Posted 9:17pm Friday 26th April 2024 by Critic

Aquarius The tension in your life is building and you feel like you're going to explode. Try going for a run around the harbour, sinking 12 cones, or having a good wank. Take a load off, I’m begging you.  Brand Deal: Smirnoff Pisces Stop pretending you know everything and start Read more...

ChatGOTH: Goth Nights

Posted 9:15pm Friday 26th April 2024 by ChatGOTH

Oh ChatGoth, How can it be that Dunners has Black Friday (Goth queen of NZ) in residence AND Australasia's best synth pop band Robots in Love and still we have no goth nights to dance til dawn in our stompy boots! Whatever shall we do?  穴   Hi 穴, I Read more...

Editorial: 2-in-1 Shampoo and Conditioner Isn’t An Ick

Posted 9:13pm Friday 26th April 2024 by Nina Brown

This could end up being a shit yarn, but you’re lucky – all five of you who read the editorial – that there’s one at all given it was written through post-Hyde fog. Anyway, here’s why 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner isn’t an ick. Last year, for Anna’s Read more...

Booze Reviews: White Russian

Posted 8:37am Tuesday 23rd April 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

There’s something to be said about milk-based cocktails. They’re sweet, creamy, and have you teetering on the edge of shitting your pants. Having recently watched The Big Lebowski, naturally White Russians were the only way to approach this inconsistent but virtuous thrill of Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Bathroom Olympics

Posted 8:08pm Sunday 21st April 2024 by Critic

This is how I won a $3 plastic trophy for winning a sex competition. Last year a mate and I wanted to attend an event: party buses, bar crawl and silly dress up – ideal. It was a five hour drive away, but we figured that if we found men at the event to shack up with the accommodation was free Read more...

Debatable: Should climate change be an individual responsibility?

Posted 7:56pm Sunday 21st April 2024 by Julia Randerson

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For Let’s face it: the UN’s climate conferences are infamously ineffective, corporations tend to dislike any Read more...

Local Produce: Ann Arkii

Posted 5:25pm Sunday 21st April 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Ann Arkii is the Monarch of the Ōtepoti drag scene. Having performed drag for over a year, Ann is often credited with revitalising the drag scene in Dunedin through the Ōtepoti Drag Directory, which helps feature and encourage emerging drag artists. Critic Te Ārohi sat down with Ann Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 8

Posted 5:05pm Sunday 21st April 2024 by Critic

Aquarius Aquarius, you have been busy, and it’s showing. The dark circles and chapped lips aren't cute. Sometimes taking a night off the booze is a good idea so you won't look 20 going on 35. Your turn on: Netflix adaptation of Wattpad porn Pisces A bad week is in the cards for Read more...

Introducing Your Clubs & Socs Rep

Posted 5:02pm Sunday 21st April 2024 by Emma Jackson

Hello lovely people! My name is Emma Jackson and I am your Clubs and Socs Rep for 2024 <3 A few things about me is that I was born in Saudi Arabia, living there for 10 years before moving back to Aotearoa and setting up camp in Christchurch. I play competitive tennis, love tramping and Read more...

Editorial: Touch Some Grass

Posted 4:55pm Sunday 21st April 2024 by Nina Brown

We’re all saying it: winter is coming, and with it the winter blues. Soon enough it’ll have all of us in its clutches once more as we wallow in the sunless pit of North Dunedin. There are all kinds of things that are recommended to help you cope. My advice? Just touch some Read more...

Local Produce: HŌHĀ

Posted 2:09pm Sunday 14th April 2024 by Jordan Irvine

HŌHĀ is an Ōtepoti noise duo composed of drummer Madison Kelly (they/them) and guitarist Liam Clune (he/him). The band formed in early 2021, with the two friends coming together for jam sessions before eventually becoming a band playing gigs, most recently at Camp A Low Read more...

Debatable: Should we decriminalise all drugs?

Posted 1:56pm Sunday 14th April 2024 by Julia Randerson

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For  It’s high time to hash out some legislation that treats drug use as a health issue, not a criminal one. The Read more...

Booze Reviews: Long White Hazy Lemonade

Posted 1:49pm Sunday 14th April 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

RTD’s have now fallen victim to the shameless marketing trend that’s conned every corduroy-wearing millennial in Wellington into drinking the most experimental hazy IPA. Trying to prove your superiority of taste and class doesn’t cover up the fact you get shamelessly pissed every Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Ex-Best Friend’s Ex-Boyfriend Fucker

Posted 1:21pm Sunday 14th April 2024 by Critic

Thank god this happened back in my home country, I would be shanked if this got back to them. At my school in year 12, my friend (let’s call her Amelia) got a boyfriend (let’s call him Jed) who had a completely identical (slightly fitter) twin brother. I, being perpetually single Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 7

Posted 1:19pm Sunday 14th April 2024 by Critic

Aquarius You’re at a crossroads this week. Either accept that you have tummy issues and swap to oat milk or shit yourself in the most embarrassing place possible: three metres away from the bouncer outside U-Bar.  Strain of weed to try: Sour Diesel Pisces You take a creative Read more...

Editorial: Stay Safe, Kids

Posted 1:08pm Sunday 14th April 2024 by Nina Brown

Welcome to the Drugs Issue. You may have picked that up already based on the bong-heavy design of both the cover and centrefold. We timed it to come out the week of Hyde Street Party and 4/20 – which conveniently happens to be the same day this year. I see you, OUSA. “Drugs” is Read more...

Local Produce: Purple Dog

Posted 10:09pm Friday 5th April 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Starting off the year with a slew of Pint Night performances at U-Bar, Purple Dog have now established themselves as a prominent Ōtepoti band. As they gear up to release a second single, Critic Te Ārohi caught up with the band to ask about their origin story, new music, and upcoming Read more...

Debatable: Should Hyde residents have to pay for tickets to the Hyde Street Party?

Posted 10:07pm Friday 5th April 2024 by Liam Gould

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For: Liam Gould  Okay, so it might be a bit stink that on top of overpaying for what is likely a cold and damp flat on Read more...

Booze Review: Mulled Wine

Posted 9:57pm Friday 5th April 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

Daylight savings is creeping forward, bringing with it shit weather and a splash of seasonal depression. In this autumnal slump, we want a drink that reminds us of simpler times, like Christmas – not New Zealand Christmas, but the one you see in low-budget rom-coms. I want to get fucked up Read more...

ChatGOTH: Heracles

Posted 9:50pm Friday 5th April 2024 by ChatGOTH

Hi ChatGOTH, I need help slaying the Hydra. My ex will not stop trying to talk to me. As per usual post-break up courtesy, I asked for space but little did I know how challenging this labour would be. Long story short, it got to the point where I had to block her (so my phone would stop Read more...

Takeaways: Week 6

Posted 9:49pm Friday 5th April 2024 by Critic

SOMETHING TO WATCH ‘Almost Pumping’ short film If you haven’t watched it yet, you’re missing out. Isaac Chadwick’s short film ‘Almost Pumping’ is a 16-minute fever dream of surf, as Chaddy and his mates tackle the waves of Indonesia, describing Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Catman

Posted 8:53pm Friday 5th April 2024 by Critic

We’re coming up on the anniversary of this story so I feel as though I have enough closure to share it. This was my first attempt at a Tinder hook up after a breakup, and I knew the guy from home so I thought it would be chill. No surprises, I was wrong.  Everything is set up, Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 6

Posted 8:28pm Friday 5th April 2024 by Critic

Aquarius When life gives you lemons, make a vodka LLB (lemon, lime and bitters), sit back and watch the world burn. There is nothing you can do to save those plebs. Your morning mantra: I am healthy, I am wealthy Pisces You are very aware of your surroundings this week. While your intuition is Read more...

Editorial: Turn On Your Heat Pump

Posted 8:25pm Friday 5th April 2024 by Nina Brown

It’s time we all grew up and turned our heat pumps on. I will die on this hill. To all the power Scrooges out there, I get it. The early stages of flatting are a hard fiscal slap in the face. You hear the phrase “cozzie livs” (boomer translation: “cost of living”) Read more...

Booze Review: Sour Apple Cruisers

Posted 4:35pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

Critic was a bit late this St Patty’s to jump on the bandwagon and acquire the breatha’s Irish drink of choice: Lime Cruisers. We even mished to the unfamiliar territory of South Dunedin, but to no avail. We were left with the consolation prize, the ugly step-sister of this green and Read more...

Mi Goreng Graduate: Chocolate Mousse

Posted 4:33pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Ruby Hudson

Serves: 6 Time: 20 mins + 2 hrs cooling Bring on those sexual desires and impress that special someone with this smooth and luxurious choccy mousse. Since dark chocolate is packed full of aphrodisiac, this recipe is sure to get you in the mood. While I admit the whole aphrodisiac thing could be Read more...

Local Produce: Give Up

Posted 4:06pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Give Up is the newest Ōtepoti shit-head post-punk band. They came to prominence last year after making the Bring the Noise finals, which was only their second gig. Now, after opening for Beet-wix and snagging a pint night slot, they’re rolling with the motion of the ocean and are keen to Read more...

Debatable: Should you watch porn?

Posted 4:04pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Abby Bowmar

TW: SA, mentions of abuse For You have an internet connection, an incognito tab, and 10 minutes (8? 5? 2?) on your hands. Put aside the guilt your Catholic primary school instilled in you, and remember to disconnect from your flat’s Bluetooth speaker.  Modern society Read more...

Do it Your Fucking Self: How to Breatha-fy Your Room

Posted 3:56pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Sam Smith-Soppet

As a former “dumb fresher fuck”, you’ve just moved into the big wide world. By that, we mean out of a hall, into a beat-as-fuck six-bedroom flat somewhere on Leith, Castle, Dundas or one of the other streets that almost guarantees you are never seeing your bond again. Your room Read more...

Takeaways: Week 5

Posted 3:41pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Critic

Something to watch 5 Broken Cameras  5 Broken Cameras is a documentary film from the perspective of Emad, a Palestinian man who captured first-hand the protests in Bil’in – a West Bank village that struggled against Israeli settlements encroaching on their land from 2005. The Read more...

Editorial: Hook-Up Culture is the New Cool Girl

Posted 3:38pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Nina Brown

Dunedin hook-up culture has gaslighted us all into prioritising male pleasure over female pleasure, and just accepting this as the norm. Women’s sexual enjoyment is swept aside, and being okay with this is added to the criteria of Cool Girl. You’re a Cool Girl if you have mediocre one Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 5

Posted 3:04pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by Critic

Aquarius Your rizz is at an all-time high. Now’s the time to start talking to your lecturers and tutors nicely. Build that relationship so that when you inevitably forget to hand in assignments, there isn't too much blowback. Sexy-time song: ‘Close’ by Nick Jonas ft. Tove Read more...

ChatGOTH: Fast and Curious

Posted 2:50pm Saturday 23rd March 2024 by ChatGOTH

Hey ChatGOTH, There’s an epidemic of straight people walking slow. As a goth, how do you deal with that?  Sincerely, Fast and Curious.  Hi Fast and Curious,  Confession: I’m a queer slow walker. Yes, we exist. It depends on the breed of goth, but most are Read more...

ChatGOTH: Baby Gay

Posted 10:33am Monday 18th March 2024 by ChatGOTH

Hey ChatGOTH! I need advice. I’ve graduated from just being a bit bicurious to deciding that I’m definitely interested in dating other girls. Exciting, but also very scary! How do I go about doing that here? There are gay girls in Dunedin, right? Is it okay that I’m not Read more...

Debatable: Should the Vice Chancellor’s Salary be Removed?

Posted 6:17pm Sunday 17th March 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For With the fucked-up state of academic institutions across the world in a neoliberal system where the Uni is run like a Read more...

Moaningful Confession: Kiss'n Boob

Posted 5:40pm Sunday 17th March 2024 by Critic

I’m sure a lot of Dunedin’s Sapphics can relate. The situation here is fucking dire. The streets of Dunners appear to be void of any queer woman, as do the confessions here. So, I thought I’d contribute a story of my own for your lady-on-lady reading pleasure. Let me set the Read more...

Booze Review: 818 Tequila Blanco

Posted 5:33pm Sunday 17th March 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

What's better: Keeping Up With The Kardashians on a cold Friday or 818 Tequila on a Tuesday night and keeping up with a developing alcohol addiction?  Kendall Jenner's 818 Tequila has landed in Aotearoa, and we couldn't be happier – finally, I can reach my dream physique of Read more...

Local Produce: Rosie Roaché

Posted 5:16pm Sunday 17th March 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Rosie Roaché is a talented visual artist with a show coming to Dunedin Fringe. After the success of last year's candid photography exhibition ‘Flâneur’, Rosie is back with an innovative personal project involving Pasifika culture. ‘Brown Skin Girls’ is a Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 4

Posted 5:10pm Sunday 17th March 2024 by Critic

Aquarius Aquababes, you are levelling up and recognising your worth. Financially you're doing amazing, finally curbing that wee spending habit. Stay focused and remember: just because it's on sale, that doesn't mean you're losing money if you don't buy it. Sweet treat of the Read more...

Editorial: We Need to Talk About Gaza

Posted 5:08pm Sunday 17th March 2024 by Nina Brown

We’re going to talk about Gaza. It would be a mistake to think that this is a decision Critic has taken lightly.  Editorship at Critic is constantly changing. Most editors only stay for one year, with former editor Fox breaking the mould by staying for two. And with each editor, the Read more...

Do it your fucking self: How to fix a scratchy woollen jumper or flannel

Posted 5:04pm Sunday 17th March 2024 by Critic

Yeah, it’s still too warm for flannels but that just means that they’re dirt cheap at op shops. Wool (as in fibre grown from sheep or similar, not just any kind of yarn) is a natural material that keeps you warm and dries quickly when it’s wet. It can also be scratchier than a Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Luigi's Mansion

Posted 12:07pm Monday 11th March 2024 by Critic

It was a dark and stormy night; the wind was howling like the swirling storm inside (my uterus). Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I tried. It was semester break, and my friends and I decided to mish to Queenstown for a few days. After a long and windy trip across the mushroom kingdom, we Read more...

Booze Review: Hennessy Very Special Cognac

Posted 1:41pm Sunday 10th March 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

Hennessy is like that one soundcloud rapper from high school who exclusively wears Vlone and thinks they’re one song away from making it big. It looks like a top shelf liquor and has the price tag to match, but leaves everyone looking at you questioning who the fuck you think you Read more...

Local Produce: Tama Alexander

Posted 1:30pm Sunday 10th March 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Tama Alexander is a prominent voice in the comedy scene who uses his student experiences to entertain both locally and nationally, combining cutting sardonic humour with musical theatricality. The 2023 Dunedin Fringe Festival saw Tama’s debut solo show ‘Fresher’, which detailed his Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 3

Posted 1:27pm Sunday 10th March 2024 by Critic

Aquarius You have a good head on your shoulders, so why are you leading them on? It’s not like you to be so flaky with romance and friendships. Figure out what you want and commit – it won’t be easy, but it’s better than the guilt, Aquarius.  Habit to pause: Hitting Read more...

Editorial: But Why is the Fun Gone?

Posted 1:15pm Sunday 10th March 2024 by Nina Brown

Students can’t seem to catch a fucking break. There’s something in the water, and it’s certainly not rum. Nothing alcohol-related, adjacent, or even slightly hinting at the A-word. That’s a bad word now.  I’d like to start with the disclaimer that we’re Read more...

Debatable: Should lecture recordings be made available from St Paddy’s Day?

Posted 1:10pm Sunday 10th March 2024 by Otago University Debating Society

Debatable is a column written by the Otago University Debating Society. The Debating Society welcomes new members and meets at the Business School every Tuesday at 6pm. For Every lecturer knows that St Patrick’s Day is a de-facto Dunedin day of rest. To go against this and refuse to Read more...

ChatGOTH: InsomNina

Posted 12:45pm Sunday 10th March 2024 by ChatGOTH

ChatGPT could never. Send all your woes and worries about foes to chatgoth@critic.co.nz for totally real and legit advice. Hi ChatGOTH, I was going to send in something about my sex life but it's been so long since I've felt human touch that there's honestly no point. The more Read more...

Do it your fucking self: How to Unfuck your Vacuum

Posted 4:52pm Tuesday 5th March 2024 by Sam Smith-Soppet

Picture this: you’ve been riding the bender-coaster that is Flo and O-Week, you roll out of your bed on the wrong side of midday, and in a rare sober moment for you (or any student), you realise that your flat is a tip. A bombsite, even. Sure, you rush around and do your laundry, but the Read more...

Takeaways: Week 2 2024

Posted 4:33pm Tuesday 5th March 2024 by Critic

SOMETHING TO WATCH ‘While My Guitar Gently Weeps’ - Prince, Tom Petty, Steve Winwood, Jeff Lynne, more Taking place at the 2004 Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame, two members of the Wilb’s help sing the ‘Quiet Beatle’ banger “While My Guitar Gently Read more...

ChatGOTH: Birkenstunk

Posted 4:26pm Tuesday 5th March 2024 by ChatGOTH

ChatGPT could never. Send all your woes and worries about foes to chatgoth@critic.co.nz for totally real and legit advice. Hey girl!!!! Just thought I would reach out with one of the issues I've currently been going through. Generally speaking, I'm a pretty happy guy with great Read more...

Local Produce: VELVET the label.

Posted 5:11pm Saturday 2nd March 2024 by Jordan Irvine

Max Came is the frontman of indie rock band Hot Sauce Club, and has recently created VELVET the label., alongside Will Georgeson of Pool House and Max Hackshaw of Frank on Tap. VELVET exists to promote artists around New Zealand and the world, currently made up of the three bands but looking to Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 2 2024

Posted 4:21pm Saturday 2nd March 2024 by Critic

Aquarius Aquarius, 2024 is the year to be you. Wear that kinda ugly op-shop top or those shoes that hurt to walk in. You make it look good!  Dunedin hot spot to visit: First Church Pisces Sometimes it feels like everyone hates you, and maybe they do. You’re still hot though, Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: A Helping Hand

Posted 4:10pm Saturday 2nd March 2024 by Critic

I, like many people, am a massive fan of men moaning during sex but unfortunately it has been a while since I have heard this live and in person.  A few months ago, I was scrolling through TikTok and an audio of Pedro Pascal moaning came up on my fyp (thank you algorithm). I hadn’t Read more...

Debatable: Should you go on a date before sleeping with someone?

Posted 4:04pm Saturday 2nd March 2024 by Critic

For: The Pope After Covid, people tend to have an aversion to actually socialising, but they all still want a shag. Crazy concept talking to people, I know, but our parents managed to do it (for the most part) so why can’t you all? Hell, if you actually talk to the breatha or beezy you are Read more...

Booze Reviews: Purple Goanna

Posted 3:09pm Saturday 2nd March 2024 by Chunny Bill Swilliams

Yup, love ‘em or hate ‘em, they still make this stuff. Purple Gs are getting funnelled, chugged, vortexed, snorkelled, and otherwise demolished at high speeds – much like the endangered Goannas of its namesake. For some reason, every other person just assumed that the OG – Read more...