Pisces
Invest in fruit during this week's grocery shop. Your memory and mind is stronger than ever and you will definitely not forget about the fruit and let it rot in the back of your fridge for three weeks. Now is also a good time to pick up a new hobby – maybe crosswords.
Instrument to master: Flute
Libra
Expect unexpected compliments, social invites or a long-lost friend flicking you a text. With your charm peaking this week, the universe is practically begging you to let loose and have fun. But don't let indecision sabotage your momentum.
Instrument to master: Bass Guitar
Aries
You're going to find out some pretty disturbing things about one of your close friends this week. Be sure to hear their side of the story but remember to take it with a grain of salt. Their actions are not a reflection of you but definitely reevaluate what you are looking for in friends.
Instrument to master: Decks
Sagittarius
Something big is coming to an end and you must savour these last moments. Even though it seems like a slog now, in the future you will miss the mundaneness of the tasks. But don't let yourself wallow in the thought of it nearly being over, keep living life to the fullest.
Instrument to master: Synth
Aquarius
Your flatmates have been feeling pretty confrontational, and even if you don't want to, you need to be confrontational back to them, otherwise you will be stuck living in a dictatorship where you're miserable and have to bitch to your friends about your flatties.
Instrument to master: Ocarina
Scorpio
This week someone will piss you off. I mean really fucking fuck you off. You will have two options, either handle the situation with grace and decorum or you will absolutely rip them the fuck out and make them cry. Choose carefully.
Instrument to master: Stylophone
Cancer
Embrace the messiness of life, because not everything can be colour coded and alphabetised all the time. If you let yourself thrive in chaos you'll grow more resilient and also build a pretty good personality.
Instrument to master: Kalimba
Leo
Socialising is the name of the game this week. I'm talking pub quizzes, brunches, and boozy Sundays. Be sure to invite your friends at least 48 hours in advance, as well as putting enough money aside for your activities. You don't want to be the one who has to drink water instead of a Guinness at The Bog.
Instrument to master: Harmonica
Capricorn
Go for a big walk and you will unlock the wonders of the world. So make a new playlist, pack some sandwiches and put on a matching pair of socks. You must also be willing to see and understand things that scare you out of those socks.
Instrument to master: Hang Drum
Taurus
After a rough few weeks, life is back on the up. Everyone has to go through those pits to be able to truly appreciate the beauty of the shitty world around us. Make sure to live in the moment because you never know when it'll be a shitter again.
Instrument to master: Violin
Virgo
Time to dust off the winter sheets. Your flat is cold, damp, and smelly, and this weather has not been helping your case. Shivering yourself to sleep is not a great way to feel well rested the next day so maybe talk to your flatties about turning the heat pump on before 9pm.
Instrument to master: Yidaki
Gemini
Stability is your middle name, and it's getting boring. Spice things up a bit. Sell all your furniture on Facebook marketplace and thrift a heap of new stuff. Switch your whole degree based on one article you read while high. Change is hard but good, especially when your current routine includes smoking weed every night.
Instrument to master: Kazoo