Archive

A Definitive Ranking of the Uni Clocktower Bongs

Posted 3:38pm Tuesday 7th April 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

Everytime I sit in my room, the clocktower’s flat chimes remind me that my time in this world is fleeting. Every bong that rattles through my window slowly drives me insane.  Because I have nothing else to do, and to help you all feel a little bit closer to campus, I have categorised Read more...

A Tale of Two Servers: UniCol and Locals

Posted 8:48pm Thursday 2nd April 2020 by Wyatt Ryder

Good and evil. Light and dark. Yin and yang. Mine and craft.  There are few things in life more wondrous than the joy of sharing a beautiful blocky world with your friends. All the epic gamers who haven’t got the new Animal Crossing are spending their lockdown on Minecraft. This Read more...

Essential Dealing: How Unlicensed Pharmacists Ensure a Clean Supply

Posted 8:23pm Wednesday 1st April 2020 by Sinead Gill

If there is ever a time for weed to be legal, it is during a pandemic. Personally, my anxiety has been at an all time high, though I am slowly learning to be kinder to myself for not being as productive as usual. Sometimes, the only way I can sleep is with a cheeky bit of the dev’s Read more...

Art Hoe Training

Posted 3:25pm Sunday 29th March 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters

Famous museums all around the world are offering virtual tours of their exhibits to help pass the endless void of time during this quarantine period. That’s right, VR isn’t just for porn. Now’s your chance to one up that flatmate that went to Europe once and never shuts up about Read more...

The Ultimate Guide to Starting a Flat Orgy

Posted 8:31pm Friday 27th March 2020 by Naomii Seah

Step one Start off nice and slow. You don’t want to spook anyone. Complain very loudly about the fact that you’re not having sex while in isolation during flat dinner, or whenever you’re all congregated together. Step two A few days later, suggest that you all watch porn Read more...

How to Party 2 Meters Apart

Posted 4:44pm Tuesday 24th March 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

It’s that sick season and we shouldn’t be out here playing games with any virus, period. But. Dunedin has a party reputation that needs to be upheld for the sake of media articles all over New Zealand, so that our grandparents can post them on our Facebook page saying "Kyle Read more...

How to Take Feet Pics

Posted 8:42pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Critic

For those of you whose casual employment is drying up and who are thinking about ways to make money from home by selling pictures of your feet, Critic has you covered.   The feet: Literally any feet will do. The more natural, the better - leave those beautiful little toe hairs alone. Read more...

Students “In Limbo” Waiting for Covid-19 to Hit Campus

Posted 7:33pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Sinead Gill

Otago students are “scared”, “concerned”, and “feel as if [their] whole lives are about to come toa stand-stil” over the recent Covid-19 outbreak. Last Tuesday, students came together to celebrate St Patrick’s day in what many considered the final send Read more...

What to Do in Self-Isolation

Posted 6:35pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Henessey Griffiths

Everyone is freaking out about Coronavirus at the moment, buying mass amounts of toilet paper and hand sanitizer, just in case. The fear of the unknown has taken us over. What if it hits Dunedin? What if you get it? What if everything gets shut down and you don’t have enough supplies to last Read more...

Seagulls: An Exposé

Posted 6:33pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters

Seagulls, the resident shit cunts of almost every city in New Zealand. Despite interacting with them on a daily basis, there remains much unknown to the general public about them. How long can they fly? What are their intentions? Do they have a supportive father figure? One of the biggest Read more...

Kebab House

Posted 6:32pm Thursday 19th March 2020 by Kaiya Cherrington

Operating a family business can be tough. Long days, commitment to work, and family time 24/7. Yet somehow, a few full-time students and their father run a kebab shop specialising in Afghan food in a place that is very different from Afghanistan: North Dunedin. I decided to sit down and talk to Read more...

Students to Watch: Hamish and Angus

Posted 6:51pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Oscar Paul

Hamish Todd and Angus Tylee are proof that, sometimes, a mate’s hairbrained scheme isn’t as cooked as you might first think. From a bedroom in Arana (lol) in 2017, the duo deduced that if no one else would bring drum and bass to Dunedin, then, fuck it, why couldn’t they just do it? Read more...

Up and Cuming: Burger Plant

Posted 6:49pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Annabelle Vaughan

In recent months, anyone who has driven down Great King Street has probably noticed the absence of Golden Sun Takeaways. The once iconic, always faithful fish and chip institution has instead been replaced by a mysterious new building named ‘Burger Plant’. Upon noticing this dramatic Read more...

Bees on the Brain

Posted 6:48pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Sophia Carter Peters

Have you ever felt a telepathic connection with honey bees? Well, you may be closer than you think. Otago’s Zoology Department has recently published a paper describing the similarities between certain bee brain waves and those of primates (including humans). Paul Szyszka, Lecturer and Read more...

(Don’t) Ask Otago

Posted 6:46pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Caroline Moratti

DISAPPOINTING SERVICE !!!!! 3 stars Their website claims that “AskOtago offers help and support for all those who study, work or contact the University of Otago” which is clearly NOT TRUE !!! !!!!!!!!! I went to AskOtago in PERSON to ask about a mole I had that appeared to be Read more...

Big, Brown and Bi: @nudes_and_pincushions

Posted 6:18pm Thursday 12th March 2020 by Abigail Faletoese

For over a year now, Dunedin-based third year Medicine and History student, Jaya*, has been using her creativity to fill a void in our otherwise white washed Instagram feeds. Her Instagram page is full of the “artistic ramblings of an angry brown girl”, and is an eclectic mix of Read more...

Look Mom, No Hands!

Posted 6:37pm Thursday 5th March 2020 by Fox Meyer

The following are three true accounts of wet dreams. For the record, wet dreams are totally normal, and rarely this messy. These are the greatest cum-capers, the crème de la crème, the (e)Mission Impossible of nocturnal emissions. Enjoy at the lads’ expense. #1 Woke up from Read more...

An Ode to the Cocktower

Posted 6:32pm Thursday 5th March 2020 by Naomii Seah

Oh cock tower! oh cock tower! Your presence makes me horny, To see you chiming every day Makes my morning glory.   Your dinging and a donging, Fills me with such longing With every peal, you make me squeal "I'm late to my class meeting!"   But Read more...

Dating Ace

Posted 6:22pm Thursday 5th March 2020 by Oscar Francis

Asexuality is a sexuality; the A in LGBTQIA+. No, it doesn’t mean you reproduce with yourself, unlike what your year 9 biology might have you thinking. It means you don’t experience sexual attraction like most people do. It means you if you see a hot stud across the road, you might say Read more...

Dunedin News’ Coronavirus Discourse

Posted 6:22pm Thursday 5th March 2020 by Oscar Paul

Need to know more about the latest trends and pandemics? Visit Dunedin News, the single largest online forum for our fine city in the South. Dunedin News is a Facebook group founded in 2014, with the sole purpose of housing the most up-to-date collection of info from the wider Dunedin area. But Read more...