Archive

Vitalogy | Issue 10

Posted 3:51pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Prof's Wood & Ruddock

Sore Throat - A single treatment with kerosene oil will usually be sufficient to cure the worst case of sore throat. Toothache - Saturate cotton with kerosene and insert it in the tooth. It will generally afford speedy recovery. Speedy cure for colds - The kerosene oil remedy will cure most Read more...

Cookin' Up Love | Issue 10

Posted 3:32pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Lovebirds

Each week, we lure two singletons to The Captain Cook Hotel, give them food and drink, then wait for their reports to arrive in our inbox. If this sounds like you, email critic@critic.co.nz. But be warned--if you dine on the free food and dash without sending us a writeup, a Critic writer will Read more...

The Hell Hole | Issue 10

Posted 3:30pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Chelle Fitzgerald

It was a warm day in December. A temperate breeze was beginning to pick up, but even the possibility of a turn in the weather could not dilute the Christmas-time joy in Dunedin. Craning their necks impatiently, the villagers scanned the horizon for a sign of the festivities promised. The children Read more...

Ethel & Hyde | Issue 10

Posted 3:27pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Student Support

Dear Ethel & Hyde My flatmate's boyfriend keeps eating my food. I know it is him but when I confronted him he denied it. What should I do? Hangry Ethel and Hyde is brought to you by the Student Support Centre. They advise you to take Ethel’s advice. Send your questions Read more...

Mystery Object Hunt

Posted 3:19pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Critic

p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; line-height: 12.0px; font: 14.0px Helvetica} span.s1 {font-kerning: none} span.s2 {font: 14.0px 'Fira Sans'; font-kerning: none} We have a brand new column for you with prizes to be won! Read the clues, look at the picture, then get yourself over to Read more...

David Clark | Issue 10

Posted 3:11pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by David Clark

Freedom of speech is incredibly important. Recently, several students have come to speak with me on this topic. Of course, when talking to a community representative like myself whose job it is to speak out on issues, they find themselves preaching to the choir. I was impressed with the Read more...

Poetry Corner | Issue 10

Posted 3:06pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Jess TC

Saturday and I am done, No more, sweet children, No more fun.   I dry my sheets, and make my bed —the Diesels have lost their power— Kettle’s boiled, Netflix instead, And then I’ll read for an hour. Ready for an early rise, My heavy head drops Read more...

Vapourium Presents Science Tank | Issue 10

Posted 3:01pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Wee Doubt

Jonas Salk was an American medical researcher and virologist. He discovered and developed one of the first successful polio vaccines, released in 1955. Salk then announced he would not patent the vaccine. When asked about it, Salk said, "Could you patent the sun?" He believed that public Read more...

ODT Watch | Issue 10

Posted 2:57pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Charlie O’Mannin

To start this week the ODT has a story about a time travelling child who was also inexplicably drafted into the armed services. Either that or the ODT just made a characteristically insensitive ‘veteran’ pun.   It says a lot about sheep breeding as a talent that the Read more...

You Should Drink Bavaria This Weekend

Posted 2:46pm Sunday 7th May 2017 by Swilliam Shakesbeer

I had splurged on a couple of unnecessary expenses this week, like an optometrist appointment and some vegetables, so I was feeling pretty skint when it came to the old moolah department. So it truly lifted my heart when I saw that New World was looking out for me with a $19.99 12-pack club card Read more...

Editorial | Issue 10

Posted 10:36am Sunday 7th May 2017 by Lucy Hunter

This week Critic has a bit of a music theme going on. We bring you hot scoops from Feastock, a Kiwi’s take on Coachella featuring a delicious cheese sandwich, a rock dog floating on a tiny raft in the Dunedin harbour, and a review of opera singer Jonathan Fa'afetai Lemalu at the Town Hall. Read more...

Vitalogy | Issue 9

Posted 1:54pm Sunday 30th April 2017 by Prof's Wood & Ruddock

The character of persons is sometimes indicated by the colour of the hair.  The bilious temperament, black hair and dark skin are generally found associated. These indicate strength of character and sensuality.  Fine hair and dark skin show purity, goodness and strong Read more...

Hi From Granddad

Posted 1:42pm Sunday 30th April 2017 by Mat Clarkson

Words by Mat Clarkso, art by Saskia Rushton-Green Hello! It is your Granddad here! Just dropping you a line to let you know how we are getting on at home! First, a little family news. Grandma has gone to visit her sister in Taupo, as you know I cannot stand that woman ever since she pointed out Read more...

Cookin' Up Love | Issue 9

Posted 1:34pm Sunday 30th April 2017 by Lovebirds

Each week, we lure two singletons to The Captain Cook Hotel, give them food and drink, then wait for their reports to arrive in our inbox. If this sounds like you, email critic@critic.co.nz. But be warned--if you dine on the free food and dash without sending us a writeup, a Critic writer will Read more...

Who Doesn't Love a Shandy?

Posted 1:27pm Sunday 30th April 2017 by Swilliam Shakesbeer

Imagine you’re on your third day of a bender, the hardest of the lot, the simple thought of starting to drink again is stifling while you lie in bed hoping death comes shortly. The strongest willed of the group are starting to get back on the horse as the sun beats through your curtains Read more...

Vapourium Presents Science Tank | Issue 9

Posted 1:20pm Sunday 30th April 2017 by Ben Cravens

Ask anyone and they’ll be happy to tell your their opinion on healthcare or immigration. This makes sense because most of the time arguments can be made for both sides of any policy issue. However, lately there has been an alarming trend of established truths being heckled by the Read more...

The Hell Hole | Issue 9

Posted 1:14pm Sunday 30th April 2017 by Jessica Thompson Carr

Hannah and I had stayed there once on a school trip. You know, the night at the museum thing they do where you go into a tent and learn about astronomy and then they tuck you up in your sleeping bag and tell you spooky stories about the one mummy they have downstairs. So we decided to reminisce and Read more...

Ethel & Hyde | Issue 9

Posted 1:06pm Sunday 30th April 2017 by Student Support

Ethel & Hyde: A call for questions from our good and evil agony aunts. If you want to sort out your problems and/or make them worse, you should write to ethelandhyde@ousa.org.nz Ethel says: All you wee buttons out there having some problems should write in to me for some practical Read more...

David Clark | Issue 9

Posted 11:27am Sunday 30th April 2017 by David Clark

I hear from those who have been about the university for some time that anxiety and stress related illnesses are becoming more prevalent. The reasons for this are complex, though the growing expectations placed on young people likely play a part.  Just about everyone I speak with knows Read more...

ODT Watch | Issue 9

Posted 11:11am Sunday 30th April 2017 by Charlie O’Mannin

To start this week, the ODT have decided, once again, to hedge their bets. Poor agnostics   Next, the ODT presents their latest champion of justice  Wool has spent the last decade learning martial arts in a remote mountain cave   A throwback to the golden age Read more...