Archive

Student Culture Is Fucked

Posted 9:40pm Sunday 24th February 2013 by Zane Pocock

Castle Street has officially become lame following the completed transformation of the former Gardens Tavern (“Gardies”) into a $3.3 million University-owned and operated student study centre. The building, located at the north end of Castle Street, was a much- loved and notorious student night spot Read more...

Proctor Approves Of Arm-Breaking As Form Of Punishment

Posted 9:40pm Sunday 24th February 2013 by Bella Macdonald

Two University of Otago students had a disarming start to their O-Week after fall- ing off the roof of their flat, each breaking an arm. The incidents were subsequently leaked to the Otago Daily Times, humiliating the pair. The pair had been drinking a few beers when one of them fell off the Read more...

OUSA Cook-ing up a deal?

Posted 9:40pm Sunday 24th February 2013 by Claudia Herron

Uncertainty surrounds the future of beloved student pub The Captain Cook Tavern, with DB Breweries’ lease of the bar due to run out on 29 June. The current sub-lessees, the Cook Brothers, have indicated that they do not intend to renew while OUSA have denied any bid to pick up the lease. However, Read more...

A trip down memory lane with Josh Kronfeld

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Gus Gawn

I’m a try-hard writer, so I’ll start with a quote: “It's true what they say, you should never meet your heroes, you'll only be disappointed.” (Father Dougal McGuire). Father Dougal is an idiot. Meeting your heroes is great. When I fell in love with rugby Josh Kronfeld was the best player in Read more...

Students Elect Students To The Student Seats Of Said Students’ Uni’s Council

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Staff Reporter

It’s been a full week since we had a student-based election round these parts – far too long, in Critic’s opinion. So for your voting pleasure, we present the Student Elections to the University Council. The Council is the governing body of the Uni, so it’s pretty important that there are students Read more...

Goble Gobbles Pussy

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Josie Adams

The year is coming to an end, and so is the career of one of the country’s foremost stars in student journalism: Howie Staples. During his illustrious career at Critic, which spanned a single year, Howie had his own column, graced the cover, recovered from a narcotics addiction, fooled some into Read more...

Otago Becomes Cheekier, Darker

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Claudia Herron

The number of Maori students enrolled at the University of Otago has increased by 23% over the last five years, although research has shown that Maori from poorer socio-economic areas are still under-represented in all professional programs relating to health sciences. Otago Health Sciences Read more...

It’s a Hard Knock Life

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Margot Taylor

A proposed refurbishment of the 116 year old Dunedin Prison will provide the opportunity for people to see the inside of a cell without having to be arrested. The former prison was bought by the Dunedin Charitable Trust in June for a mere $20,000. The prison was last home to criminals in Read more...

“Your Degree Is Fucking Useless” - NZ Herald

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Zane Pocock

In a prime example of how The New Zealand Herald has gone tabloid, they claimed last week that an international report shows that “New Zealand university degrees are the most worthless in the developed world”. The OECD report showed that the life-long value of a New Zealand man’s tertiary Read more...

Muhammad Zariq Farhan bin Mohd Hanif Wins Gold Award

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Gus Gawn

OUSA has presented the annual Otago Blues and Golds awards to the top athletes and cultural stars of the University of Otago. This is the 105th year in which the Blues have been awarded to students who have achieved to a high level in their chosen sport. The Golds Awards, which are in their Read more...

Affirmative Action Policy Leads to Selection of Right-Wing Editor

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Dennis Larson

The political neutrality and general quality of Critic magazine are in jeopardy after radical right-wing activist and suspected larcenist Callum Fredric was selected as Critic Editor for 2013. Fredric’s political bias is ingrained in the very follicles of his hair, which he has partially dyed Read more...

Idea Stolen From France Hailed as “Audacious”

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Claudia Herron

The Public Trust Building hosted a lavish awards ceremony for the 2012 Audacious student business plan competition, in which Ryan Everton took out the top honour with his sustainable plastic cup. Everton received $8,000 to put toward his company Globelet, which aims to reduce waste in New Zealand. Read more...

Criminals kill each other, crime rate drops

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Bella Macdonald

New Zealand Police are giving themselves a big pat on the back after statistics released show that reported crime in New Zealand has reduced, despite a significant increase in the number of murders. NZ police revealed a 5.2% decrease in national reported crime in their release of the national Read more...

Maddy Phillipps highly commended at Student Press Awards

Posted 5:59pm Sunday 7th October 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Critic is once again bathing in the nectar of success after taking out Best Student Publication at the annual Aotearoa Student Press Association (APSA) awards in Wellington on September 28. Otago’s student mag raked in the top prizes of Best Student Publication, Best Editorial, Best Series Read more...

“I didn’t have any injuries except a brain injury”

Posted 5:01pm Sunday 30th September 2012 by Gus Gawn

What’s not to like about Nitro Circus? Action sports athletes who are equal parts talented and unhinged throwing and contorting themselves off enormous jumps on both conventional and improvised toys… it’s a great concept! The same sadistic curiosity that enticed people to attend events in the hope Read more...

New Apps for the Intolerant, Autistic, and Musically Illiterate

Posted 5:01pm Sunday 30th September 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Millions of dollars were thrown around in the dragon’s den of Castle 1 Lecture theatre during the APPSTAR Showdown on Wednesday September 26. The event was the final stage of a competition in which entrants came up with an idea for a smartphone app to be developed by Otago Innovation Ltd. The Read more...

Student Artists Actually Explain the Meaning of their Work

Posted 5:01pm Sunday 30th September 2012 by Callum Fredric

The 5th Annual OUSA Art Week put over $3000 into the hands of Dunedin’s student artists, with 56 out of the 200 pieces on display were sold. Students viewing the artwork were encouraged to vote for their favourite piece in the People’s Choice Awards. The winner was Chelsea Thomson’s work Read more...

Man Commits Suicide. Oops, Critic Broke the Law

Posted 5:01pm Sunday 30th September 2012 by Zane Pocock

New media reporting guidelines released last year by the Chief Coroner have been called into question by University of Otago Professor David Fergusson and Auckland's Dr. Annette Beautrais in an editorial published in the New Zealand Medical Journal. Prof. Fergusson and Dr. Beautrais say that Read more...

Mental Health Nurses Define Yelling as Assault

Posted 5:01pm Sunday 30th September 2012 by Margot Taylor

The increasing use of synthetic cannabis is being cited as a reason for the rising number of assaults on mental health workers. In the first seven months of the year there were 131 reported assaults on Otago Southern District Health Board mental health services staff, a rise of 37% on the same Read more...

City Councillor Edgar Putting the GC in DCC

Posted 5:01pm Sunday 30th September 2012 by Zane Pocock

OUSA President Logan Edgar has backed away from claims made on Radio One last Thursday that he is starting a campaign to be elected to the Dunedin City Council next October. He is, however, “really considering it”. In the meantime, Edgar is meeting this week with the Mayor and the Electoral Read more...

Colleges Officer Organises College Sports for Colleges

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Juana Diesing

Aquinas scored a late goal to snatch the overall trophy from Arana last Wednesday, marking the end of the inaugural inter-College Soccer Trophy. Eight Colleges contested the first-ever competition, with all matches played under lights on Wednesday evenings at Logan Park. Aquinas was an early Read more...

I’m Gunna Break Your Face

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Greg Hall

After the last incident regarding a certain Gus Gawn (Sports Editor and world renowned yonker) and the NZ Breakers, the powers that be at Critic decided to send their most popular reporter to the preseason game against the Wollongong Hawks. The Critic security team signed off on this straight away, Read more...

Fraudster Gambles On Freedom, Loses

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Claudia Herron

Name suppression has been lifted for the former University of Otago accounts manager who admitted to stealing almost $240,000 from the University over seven years. Graeme “Petty Cash” Pettitt has pleaded guilty to eight charges of accessing the university’s electronic accounting system between March Read more...

House Prices in Freefall, Sell! Sell! Sell!

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Margot Taylor

Figures released by the Real Estate Institute of New Zealand show that over the last year Dunedin house prices have seen the largest fall of all major cities in the country. In August 2011 the median house price in Dunedin was $260,000. As of August 2012, a significant $20,000 has been Read more...

Physics Penalises Kickers’ Conversion Rates

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Dunedin’s Forsyth Barr stadium is transforming into the House of Pain for rugby goal-kickers, after a series of feeble goal-kicking attempts from world-class athletes have left players embarrassed and pointing fingers in all directions. During the test match between the Springboks and All Read more...

Councillor Apologises for Calling Herself Old, Blames Senility

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Claudia Herron

Age Concern Otago has condemned two Dunedin City Councillors for their self-deprecatingly calling themselves “old farts” and “old fellas”. The comments, which were made by Councillors Fliss Butcher and Richard Thomson during a full council meeting on Monday, were interpreted as offensive to the Read more...

Alligator Attacks Terrorise Dunedin

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Josie Adams

There is a strange and terrifying underbelly to Edinburgh’s progeny that we are only just discovering. This week, in news from Dunedin FL, we reveal the insider’s scoop on the alligator attacks that have been terrorising the city. Like its Celtic namesake, the alleys of the city have become a Read more...

Emerson's: Pride of the South since 1992

Posted 4:25pm Sunday 23rd September 2012 by Callum Fredric

Emerson’s has reaffirmed its status as Dunedin’s premier brewery after ten of its finest brews were honoured at the Sutton Group Brewers’ Guild of NZ Awards 2012. The Regional Best Bitter won the trophy and a gold medal in the British Ale Styles category, with silver medals going to Emerson’s Read more...

PLEDGEIT

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Staff Reporter

God, if there is a God, can be a bit or a dick. He blesses creative people with all the talent in the world, but no sales skills; no sense of self-promotion. And so they create, and suffer, and die sad lonely deaths in cold houses without ever being recognised in their lifetimes. As all creative Read more...

Student Politician Loves Spandex

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Gus Gawn

We have reached Issue 24 of Critic for the year. That means only three more to go, and it’s fair to say that the well of relevant local sports stories has run a little dry. With that in mind, I made the short trip across the hall from the Critic office to ask OUSA Exec board member Angus McDonald Read more...

Fantasy Sports: The Anti-sex

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Gus Gawn

Lurking just out of the sight of the casual sports fan is an ominous subculture: a pointless pursuit that robs sports fans of not only a high percentage of their waking hours, but also a good deal of their dignity, not to mention their allure to the opposite sex. I’m talking about fantasy sports: a Read more...

Otago Succeeds

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Margot Taylor

A series of tertiary league tables released by the Tertiary Education Commission place the University of Otago first in two out of four performance areas. The study was conducted to reveal how taxpayer-subsidised students in New Zealand are performing in tertiary study. The four performance Read more...

OUSA Is So Gay

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Zane Pocock

Candidate nominations are open for the election of OUSA’s 2013 Executive, from 9am this Monday 17 September until 4pm this Thursday 20 September. Voting is set to occur over the same time period in the week after nominations close. During the election period there will also be a referendum on Read more...

Student Jewry Sentences AUSA President to Insincere Apology

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Callum Fredric

Arena Williams, the President of the Auckland University Students’ Association (AUSA), has been forced to apologise after taking a 10-day trip to Israel, funded by the Australia/Israel & Jewish Affairs Council (AIJAC). According to its website, AIJAC “endeavours to highlight and counteract Read more...

Otago University's Two Dirty Little Screts

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Callum Fredric

Two University staff members cancelled their plans to speak at an OUSA Environment Week presentation on the University’s use of lignite coal, apparently after discussions with the University’s communications section. Energy Manager Hans Pietsch and Environmental Sustainability Co-ordinator Dr Read more...

Students Engaging in Hubba-Hubba with no Rubber

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Josie Adams

Results are in from a 2009 University of Otago Department of Preventative and Social Medicine survey which questioned nearly 3000 17 – 26 year old university students across New Zealand about their sexual practices. With no update in national sexual health and behaviour data for over 20 Read more...

Trespassed for being NORML

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Bella Macdonald

The grass is no longer greener on the University of Otago’s side after the Uni issued several Trespass orders against members of National Organisation for the Reform of Marijuana Laws (NORML) – without explaining why. On Wednesday September 12, Police issued trespass orders to a handful of Read more...

College Has Inferiority Complex

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Zane Pocock

Dr. John Kernohan, chairman of the Presbyterian Commission, which is currently governing Knox College, says that the fort-esque student hall may have to pull up the drawbridge for the last time if they are unable to raise the $10.8 million of funding needed to undertake earthquake strengthening, Read more...

Environmental Bandits Pollute Otago Campus

Posted 4:57pm Sunday 16th September 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Generation Zero have tested the theory that all publicity is good publicity, after defacing University buildings with promotional propaganda on the evening of Sunday September 9. Generation Zero members from the University of Otago have been punished by the Proctor after their publicity stunt Read more...

Uni Games

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Gus Gawn

Photo Caption: This is Mikey. She did real good at Uni Snow Games. That’s why there is a photo of her. Not cause she’s blonde. Promise. For the first time in eight years Otago University did not win the Michael Forrestall Memorial Shield for the best team at the Uni Snow Games. Numbers were Read more...

Joyce to The World

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Zane Pocock

The University of Otago is under pressure from Tertiary Education Minister Steven Joyce to increase international student numbers. With international student enrolments at Otago falling by 18.8% between 2007 and 2011, Mr. Joyce called for the University to look “very closely” at its efforts Read more...

A Week to Green Out with your Buds

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Zane Pocock

OUSA will be keeping the Greenies happy with the inaugural Environment Week starting on Monday September 10, being held “in an effort to raise student awareness of critical environmental issues, and inspire them to take action.” Scitell, a new series of lectures being launched by the Read more...

Slutwalk II: The Sluts Strike Back

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Josie Adams

On Saturday September 1 Dunedin’s second annual Slutwalk hit the streets. Beginning outside the Dental School, the marchers progressed along George Street to the Octagon, where they were addressed by speakers on the topics of slut-shaming and victim-blaming. The “Slutwalk” movement began last Read more...

Shady Sheik speaks at Islam Awareness Week

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Callum Fredric

Last week, the decadent city of Dunedin was treated to the spiritual guidance of hard-line Islamic Sheik Shady Alsuleiman. The sheik was invited by the Muslim University Students’ Association (MUSA) to deliver guest lectures for Islam Awareness Week on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday in the Castle and Read more...

Beloved Bars Bullied by Bureaucracy

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Claudia Herron

The future of many local bars remains uncertain as substantial fee increases under the new alcohol law reforms threaten their livelihood. New legislation will see bar owners fronting the full cost of licensing applications, which are currently 50% subsidised by ratepayers. Critic spoke with Read more...

Rabbi’ng Shoulders with Alternative Faiths

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Margot Taylor

The ninth annual open Peace Lecture was held last week in the St David Lecture Theatre. Israeli Rabbi Adi Cohen, who is part of the Wellington Progressive Jewish Congregation, delivered the lecture, entitled “Words, Concepts, Deeds. Peace as a way of living”. The lecture was organised by the Read more...

Asset Sales Delayed by Water and Wind Claims

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Staff Reporter

In a move that is bound to have special resonance for students, the government has decided to delay the controversial partial sale of Mighty River Power (MRP). Following a Waitangi Tribunal report that was delivered to the government on August 23, but is yet to be made public, the sale is now Read more...

QUAN dethrones COMO as Most Failed Subject

Posted 4:03pm Sunday 9th September 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Full table of pass rates by subject available here: >>University of Otago Pass Rates by Subject 2009-2011 Picking papers has become even easier at the University of Otago after figures stating the average pass rate for each subject were released under the Official Information Act (OIA). Read more...

Look for your name in this club rugby finals wrap

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Gus Gawn

An extravaganza of club code at University Oval wrapped up the local competitions two weekends ago. Southern took on Dunedin in both the Prem 2 and Prem Colts finals, held on a sun-soaked but slippery uni oval pitch. It was a remarkable achievement that the Dunedin club’s teams qualified for the Read more...

Signs of life in Otago rugby

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Gus Gawn

The Otago Rugby Union has been chewed up and shat out this off season. For a while it looked like they might not even be able to afford a team, let alone win any games. But with the ITM Cup already underway and an exciting win against Northland, things are looking up. Critic asked injured student Read more...

Skiiers and Snowboarders Ski and Snowboard in Snow

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Bella Macdonald

With winter in full flight, around 100 students from New Zealand universities gathered to shred up Wanaka for the 2012 University Snow Games, held from August 26 — 31. The winter games have been held annually since 1945, making this the 67th year of competition. With the 2013 World Read more...

Let them smoke pot!

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Zane Pocock

Data from the “Dunedin Study” has shown that under-18s who regularly smoke marijuana are at risk of permanently reducing their IQ. The same dip doesn’t occur in those who become frequent users after 18, supporting previous research which has suggested that marijuana is particularly harmful for the Read more...

Homo-Haters Horrified by Humanitarian Hubris

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Callum Fredric

August was not a good month for Family First. The lobby group’s mensis horribilis began with the Family First-affilitated “Protect Marriage” website, which opposes gay marriage, being blocked as a “hate site” by the Dunedin City Council’s automated web filter. Family First spokesman Read more...

Alcohol gets its reform on, but not really.

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Staff Reporter

After months of debate, research, and whatever else it is that Members of Parliament do, they finally dealt with New Zealand’s binge drinking culture by making absolutely no changes at all. In the first effort to create change by changing nothing at all Justice Minister Judith Collins Read more...

Farmers hate the young

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Josie Adams

On 18 August student anti-climate change group Generation Zero was brutally suppressed by The Man in response to their latest publicity stunt, a “bus” of recycled cardboard containing some of the organisation’s members, which travelled around Dunedin calling for the Government to invest in smart Read more...

Speight’s Brewery to Increase Production of Mediocre Beer

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Claudia Herron

A major re-development of Speight’s Rattray Street Brewery will enable the brewing of over 24 million litres of beer per year for thirsty scarfies. Lion Breweries has been granted resource consent for the next stage of the $29 million re-development following completion of the first stage back in Read more...

Parliament gets FABULOUS!

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Zane Pocock

Labour MP Louisa Wall’s Marriage Amendment Bill, which aims to legalise gay marriage, passed its first reading in a landslide 80-40 conscience vote on the night of August 29. The vote drew a packed public gallery at Parliament, and with many tuned into Parliament TV social media outlets went Read more...

Boy Racers Engage in Antisocial Behaviour

Posted 5:17pm Sunday 2nd September 2012 by Margot Taylor

On Friday August 24 a large contingent of boy racers took to the roads surrounding Dunedin. There were a reported 1000 “hooligans” in 400 cars participating in Dunedin’s “Big Cruise”. While many claimed that the event would be an opportunity for young car enthusiasts to show that they are merely Read more...

Five sports writers worth reading

Posted 4:33pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Gus Gawn

The thing about sports writing is that there’s a shitload of it out there, and most of it is complete garbage. I call it “down the pub syndrome”. In the past, semi-literate sports hogs would reserve their moronic ramblings for down the pub. Not anymore. There are enough “user content” sports sites Read more...

What if Nadzeya Ostapchuk is innocent?

Posted 4:33pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Gus Gawn

We knew it all along, didn't we? That hideous she-beast from the wilds of Belarus could never beat “our Val” without cheating. They're all cheats over there, aren't they? Bloody communists. She looks like a man! She’s a filthy cheat! Ban her for life! And so on. It seems like everything just Read more...

University explores subconscious undercurrents of religion

Posted 4:26pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Charlotte Greenfield

A recent study at Otago’s Department of Psychology suggests that the fear of death subconsciously makes us more religious. Among atheists, thoughts of death correlate with an increased receptivity to religious belief at an unconscious level and growing scepticism at a conscious level. For Read more...

SOULS

Posted 4:26pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Zane Pocock

SOULS – the Society of Otago University Law Students – is holding its Annual General Meeting this Monday August 20, followed by elections for the ten volunteer members of the 2013 Student Executive. The AGM will run from 11am to 5pm in the 8th Floor Common Room of the Richardson Building, and will Read more...

Mid-semester Crime Roundup

Posted 4:26pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Callum Fredric

A serial burglar from Christchurch had a pretty sweet routine going – drive down to Dunedin for a couple of days, saunter into student flats through an unlocked door or window, steal laptops and other goodies, then head back up the highway to safety. But his luck ran out on Saturday August 11 when a Read more...

Nuclear Radiation Gives Survivors Oratory Superpowers

Posted 4:26pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Josie Adams

On Friday the 10th, Dunedin was honoured to play host to two survivors of the infamous Hiroshima bombing. Shigeko Niimoto Sasamori, 80, and Michimasa Hirata, 77, were children – thirteen and nine, respectively – when the U.S. dropped the atomic bomb “Little Boy” onto the Japanese city Hiroshima on Read more...

Dunedin Has “A Bit of a Peeping Problem”

Posted 4:26pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Dunedin police have advised the University to amend its internet porn ban after six reported sightings of sexually frustrated Peeping Toms masturbating outside bedroom windows at a number of Dunedin flats. Since the year began, six offences of “peeping or peering” have been reported to the Read more...

Orange Election Guy Demands Change, Human Flesh

Posted 4:26pm Sunday 19th August 2012 by Callum Fredric

The Electoral Commission has released a draft proposal paper on changes to the MMP electoral system. The paper contains several recommendations that, if implemented, could dramatically alter the battleground for the 2014 election and beyond. The two most significant recommendations are that Read more...

Sharks almost win, Eels slightly better

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Gus Gawn

Hayden Parker will never have to pay for another beer at the Taieri Rugby Club after he kicked the Eels to a show-stopping victory in the Premier club rugby final last Saturday. Parker’s 47-metre penalty with time up on the Forsyth Barr Stadium clock capped off a 24-22 comeback victory, sealing his Read more...

Rugby Analysis

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Mavis Shamwell

I’ll start with the names: “Eels” and “Sharks”. We all know that in the animal kingdom this would be an unfair fight, but in the Club Rugby finals it seemed like a pretty even match. This made it difficult for me to decide who to support (my usual rule is to go for the underdog). That said, the Read more...

Religion in Sport? No Way.

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Gus Gawn

Religion is everywhere in sport. If you watch any sport at all, it’s impossible to avoid seeing someone thank the big man upstairs for letting them make all the people they have beaten feel like shit. Luckily in New Zealand we like to keep it to a minimum, and thankfully when a prominent Read more...

Somewhere in Dunedin An Executive Waits

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Staff Reporter

OUSA has set the voting dates of September 24 to 27 for the election of next year’s OUSA student executive. Nominations will be open from September 17 to 20, with the results to be announced on the evening of the 27th. Each of the ten positions on the executive is up for grabs, and with Read more...

Community Law Centres Face Judgment

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Zane Pocock

New Zealand’s Community Law Centres are engulfed in a shroud of mystery after the Ministry of Justice indicated that it will move to cut down to 10 and 15 Community Law contracts across the country, instead of the current regime of 25 individually funded centres. Supervising Solicitor Caryl Read more...

Rich Domino’s Sign-Wavers Get Richer

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Margot Taylor

Students have earned $780,735 more through the Student Job Search scheme in the last 12 months than in the previous 12-month period. Figures released earlier this week show that students earned $3,785,938 through SJS for the 12 months to August, which is 26% higher than the $3,005,203 earned Read more...

Mongrel Mob Abuse Public’s Trust

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Bella Macdonald

The Mongrel Mob are due for a stern slap on the wrist after being accused of having their fingers in too many pies. Police allege that Mongrel Mob members obtained money from a government funded anti-violence program, run through the Whanau Ora scheme, and used it to buy cannabis. Over a Read more...

“Treatygate”

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Callum Fredric

Critic has obtained documents from controversial race campaigner Louis Crimp, setting out a plan for a $2million campaign aiming to make New Zealand a “colourblind” (racially neutral) state. The campaign will be split into two distinct “brands”, known as “Treatygate” and “Colourblind State”. Read more...

Tertiary education to the Future!

Posted 5:14pm Sunday 12th August 2012 by Claudia Herron

A board of panellists comprised of tertiary education staff, students, and politicians gathered at the Otago Museum on Wednesday 8 August for the Tertiary Education Union’s latest public forum “Speak up for Education”. The forum had a distinctly left-wing slant, being chaired by Radio 1 Read more...

Shit's Getting Kronic

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Zane Pocock

Peter Dunne is at it again. After receiving a less than satisfactory do from his Kronic-tripping hairstylist, he has apparently put the final nail in the coffin of “dangerous” synthetic drugs, with a new policy designed to deal with syntheic drugs like Kronic. This policy will explicitly ban the Read more...

Greg goes to The New Zealand Sports Hall of Fame

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Greg Hall

Something new on your sporting pages this week. For a change of pace, Critic sent the bravest and most hirsute reporter we could find on the most dangerous assignment we could dream up. Faux-Geordie reporter Greg Hall was instructed to stake out the New Zealand Sports Hall of Fame, examine some Read more...

Girls Get Down And Derby

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Gus Gawn

Roller derby is the marmite of sports: you either love it or you don't. There are no half-measures when it comes to roller derby. Those who love it are obsessed with it. It takes over their lives and the lives of their families. People who don't really couldn't give a shit. I’m not ashamed to Read more...

Air NZ Removes GPS

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Air New Zealand has finally realised that Dunedin has some tourism opportunities, and has announced fare reductions of 11 – 41% for regional routes, which will save travellers on the Auckland to Dunedin route $14 per trip. The fare reductions, which will apply to flights after September 1 Read more...

Calves “Slaughtered Like Cattle”

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Callum Fredric

A merciless attack on four calves on a farm north of Dunedin has left the farm’s owners and their stock gutted. The attack occurred on June 19 between 10:30am and 5pm at a farm in Seacliff, roughly 30km north of Dunedin. Critic spoke to Constable Jon-Paul Tremain, who said that three calves Read more...

ACC tells injured students to “Man up” and “Walk it off”

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Margot Taylor

Academic support for students on ACC is set to change significantly. Spokespeople for the government-run accident compensation scheme have stated that the $6 million budgeted annually for children and young people who require assistance to participate in education could be better targeted to Read more...

Canterbury Uni Staff “Quaking with Fear”

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Callum Fredric

The University of Canterbury is set to cut staff numbers by 150 over the next three years in an attempt to prevent its debt, which is currently at $50 million, from spiralling out of control. Canterbury is in dire financial straits as the true financial toll of the earthquake becomes Read more...

Joyce and Hayne Get Together on Postgrads

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Staff Reporter

Critic has finally made sense of the changes to postgraduate access to the student allowance scheme, which will prevent all postgraduate students from receiving the allowance. Following a meeting between University of Otago Vice-Chancellor Professor Harlene Hayne and Tertiary Education Minister Read more...

Mayor Tells Oil and Gas Industry to Frack Off

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Josie Adams

On July 24, the DCC voted 7-6 to join the call for a moratorium on fracking, making it the fifth local authority to do so. Following the decision, the ODT reported a “fracture” in the relationship between Mayor Dave Cull and his Council and Dunedin-based National MP Michael Woodhouse, which on Read more...

Maverick Professor Threatens to Assemble Eco-Army

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Claudia Herron

Government-owned farming corporation Landcorp and the Department of Conservation are at loggerheads over the potential threat of wilding (it’s a real word, look it up) Douglas-fir trees spreading onto conservation land. Landcorp planted 189ha of Douglas-fir trees on Waipori Station near Read more...

New Drugs Regime Dunne

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 5th August 2012 by Zane Pocock

Associate Health Minister Peter Dunne is crafting a new legal high law which will be introduced to Parliament later this year and is expected to be in force by the middle of next year. Once passed, the new law will immediately criminalise all psychoactive substances, including synthetic cannabinoids Read more...

What is a Sport (Part 2)

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Gus Gawn

So here goes. First, I would like to say that this is a completely thankless task. This debate will never be decided, and no amount of emotive vitriol or ascerbic wit will bring us any closer. They only thing we can hope for is to be dragged entertainingly off-topic by some interesting thoughts and Read more...

What is a Sport (Part 1)

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Callum Fredric

Rowing is not a sport. Neither is cycling. In fact, most of the events at the 2012 Olympics are not sports. And most of the ones that are sports don’t belong at the Olympics. Sometimes the dictionary definition of a word just doesn’t cut it. According to the ivory-tower intellectuals who Read more...

Medieval Trenchcoat Knight Terrorises Waikato

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Zane Pocock

Students at the University of Waikato were falsely alarmed on Wednesday July 25 when a man wearing a trenchcoat was reported to be carrying a weapon on campus. At 10:29am, an email was sent to all staff and students following the sighting of a “tall, Caucasian male, in his twenties... with Read more...

OUSA Revolving Door Keeps On Turning

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Bella Macdonald

Maria Pozza has been elected as OUSA’s Postgraduate Representative after a fierce campaign against bitter rival No Confidence. In the final count, Pozza won with 70 votes, compared with four votes for No Confidence. Poor showing, old buddy. Pozza believed that her PhD would make her a Read more...

Lavender Armageddon Begins

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Callum Fredric

God is reportedly “gutted” after a bill aiming to legalise gay marriage was pulled from the Members’ ballot on Thursday. The Marriage (Definition of Marriage) Amendment Bill was submitted into the ballot by Labour MP Louisa Wall. The first reading of the bill is expected to be held in around six Read more...

Margaret Mahy - She Dead

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Callum Fredric

Margaret Mahy, the author who gave New Zealand the gift of such brilliant children’s books as The Lion in the Meadow and The Man Whose Mother Was a Pirate, died at the age of 76 in a Christchurch hospice last Monday night after losing her battle with cancer. Mahy arguably found her point of Read more...

Rumours not enough to kill captain cook

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Josie Adams

With the University’s new Alcohol Implementation Group (AIG) aiming to rid the streets of shameful Scarfie inebriation, it was only a matter of time before rumours began to abound regarding their nefarious plotting. Professor Jennie Connor, chairwoman of the AIG, has publicly stated that the board Read more...

Panel Debates Age Restrictions for Fermented Grain

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Claudia Herron

The controversial topic of a split legal drinking age came before a caffeine-fuelled Otago University Debating Society and a panel of guest judges in the Great Alcohol Debate last Wednesday. The negating team, who were arguing that the drinking age should remain 18, secured the win as well as Read more...

South Dunedin Blamed for all Problems

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Zane Pocock

Alternatives to the proposed liquor ban are being sought following a meeting between OUSA, Dunedin City Council representatives, and the Youth Action Committee on Tuesday July 24. The Council’s Liquor Ban Implementation Group delayed its decision on the liquor ban last month to consider Read more...

Student Health Sickened By Influenza Outbreak

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Margot Taylor

An increasing number of people have been affected by the spread of the influenza strain known as H3N2. While the name of the virus sounds similar to that of Star Wars’ R2D2, those afflicted will feel as though they’ve crash-landed on the Ice Planet Hoth. Christchurch has been hit hardest by the Read more...

University Staff Member Receives C+ in FRAUD101

Posted 2:15pm Sunday 29th July 2012 by Callum Fredric

A University of Otago staff member was escorted from the University campus by security guards last week, as police began investigating an alleged major fraud that was uncovered by an internal University audit in June. National Radio has reported that between $200,000 and $300,000 was Read more...

Sexuality in sports

Posted 10:46am Sunday 22nd July 2012 by Gus Gawn

I have to admit that I was a little nervous writing this article. Not because of what people will think, but because I am certain that I am bound to offend someone in some way. I am mindful that there might be a bit of a “poking your uneducated nose into something that doesn't really concern you” Read more...

Caden Shields

Posted 10:46am Sunday 22nd July 2012 by Gus Gawn

Caden Shields might not be at the Olympic level just yet but it seems he's on the fast track. The Dunedin-raised physiotherapy student has recently returned from a scholarship at Purdue University in Indiana, where he competed for the “Boilermakers” in long-distance running events and found his Read more...

AUSA Attempts to Abort Student Group

Posted 10:46am Sunday 22nd July 2012 by Zane Pocock

A motion that “the Pro-Life Club be disaffiliated for propagating harmful misinformation” has been voted against 227-125 by members of the Auckland University Student Association (AUSA) at a Special General Meeting on Wednesday July 18. Following an anonymous complaint made to AUSA, the Read more...