Booze Review: Jose Cuervo Tequila will murder your whole family

Posted 5:46pm Thursday 17th May 2018 by Swilliam Shakesbeer

Jose Cuervo tequila will murder your family, frame you for visa fraud, shiv you and leave you to die in a Mexican prison.  Have you ever been run over by a freight truck, stomped out by a Super Rugby team in studs, shat your liver out your arsehole, or cried yourself to sleep in a cold Read more...

Critic Blind Date | Meghan and Harry

Posted 5:44pm Thursday 17th May 2018 by Critic

The hopeful lovers on the Critic Blind Date are provided with a meal and a bar tab, thanks to the Dog With Two Tails. If you’re looking for love and want to give the Blind Date a go, email critic@critic.co.nz     Meghan Well blow me sideways and strap in for the Read more...

Advice On How To Be A Fifth Year And Increase Your Social Media Following

Posted 5:43pm Thursday 17th May 2018 by Zoe Taptiklis-Haymes and Kelly Davenport

By the time you get to fifth year/5 years +, you find yourself living alone in St Clair or a random hill/valley somewhere else in Dunedin. Your Facebook page is rusty and as a cohort, you’re averaging 20 likes per Instagram post. While there is nothing wrong with living in the real world, Read more...

Dunedin Youth Orchestra Hit The Stage with 'Rhapsody in Blue'

Posted 3:25pm Tuesday 15th May 2018 by Ihlara McIndoe

The Dunedin Youth Orchestra’s “In Blue” concert coming up on Friday 18 May at 8.15pm at Hanover Hall offers a “really chill and super fun opportunity for students to get amongst some classic orchestra works” says Isaac Shatford, DYO’s featured soloist this Read more...

ODT Watch | The Week We Felt (Briefly) Sad for the ODT

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 13th May 2018 by Charlie O’Mannin

To start this week the ODT are seeking help for a problem sculpture that keeps popping up in their garden,   They tried cutting it in half, but then they jut had two worm sculptures to deal with.      Next, some words from Councillor Lee ‘Climate Change is Read more...

Uncertainty for Te Rangi Hiroa after Dunedin Hospital Announcement

Posted 11:01pm Friday 11th May 2018 by Esme Hall

The future of Te Rangi Hiroa College is unclear after the Government announced its building is part of the new site for the Dunedin Hospital. Dunedin’s new hospital will be built on the Cadbury site and on the next block to the north, which currently contains a Wilson’s carpark and Te Read more...

The Capping Show Cult

Posted 11:01pm Friday 11th May 2018 by Jacob Houston

“You’ve just woken up, and you realise the world is in slow motion,” says the director. All right, I’ll play George Bush just doing his regular thing. That’s pretty funny. But I guess that’s been done before; maybe I should just make a character. Yeah, Read more...

Midwife Crisis

Posted 10:59pm Friday 11th May 2018 by Callum Doyle

Babies are the shitty, screaming, harbingers of shit that are one of the ‘perks’ of settling down and becoming an actual adult. Luckily most of us are not in Gore, so it’s not something we have to consider for at least a few more years. And even better, there’s a whole Read more...

The Mystery of The Disappearing Fuckboi or: The Narrow Escape In The Hyde Street Sex Attic

Posted 10:55pm Friday 11th May 2018 by Critic

OK boys and girls, ladies and gents, strap yourself in because boy do I have a story for you. I am a first-year health science student who has recently been freed from a messy relationship, and I’ve been looking to get back on the horse - so naturally I turned to Tinder. Armed with a witty Read more...

CROSSFAT

Posted 10:49pm Friday 11th May 2018 by Chelle Fitzgerald

I’m the first to admit it; I’ve gone incredibly soft and sedentary since high school. What used to be a capable and fit dancer’s body has slowly deteriorated into good hugs and heavy partying, usually accompanied by carb-laden food and quality banter, which is not actually a thing Read more...