Archive

Moaningful Confessions: Cherry cherry boom boom

Posted 3:01pm Sunday 19th March 2023 by Critic

I remember it as if it was yesterday.   New Year’s Eve was in the air, and my hunger for an intimate partner for the night was in full swing. I was talking to this girl at the time, and we thought New Year’s would be the primo opportunity to finally do it.   As she Read more...

Chargrills: Corn Frittazzzzz

Posted 2:47pm Sunday 19th March 2023 by Charly Burnett @chargrillss

The last three recipes have had heaps of ingredients, so here's one with just five must-add ingredients. It's corn.   In saying that, maize well load ‘em up with sour cream and/or sweet chilli if you've got any. Corn’t go wrong with a few greens on the side. Read more...

Editorial: The Silence of the Sulphur-Crested Cockatoos

Posted 2:42pm Sunday 19th March 2023 by Fox Meyer

I cannot stress how much interviewing Sid (page 20) felt like interviewing Hannibal Lector.   We started off in the aviary’s kitchen, getting a safety debrief. We were told that this individual was highly intelligent, that he has a history with visitors, and not to let him get too Read more...

Booze Review: Part Time Rangers

Posted 2:23pm Sunday 19th March 2023 by Albert Einsteinlager

Part Time Rangers provide aid to at-risk animals worldwide, donating 10% from every can to various charities. They are yet to help out the orangutan addicted to heroin in my basement.   The gimmick is that each box has a nice animal on it, and depending on the box you buy, you will be Read more...

In the Eyes of the Beholder: Dunedin Art Reviews

Posted 2:18pm Sunday 19th March 2023 by Fox Meyer

Callout: This column is supported by DPAG, but they have no influence on the reviews   Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out Read more...

Local Produce: Yours: Your Place for Coffee and Anarchy

Posted 2:06pm Sunday 19th March 2023 by Zak Rudin

Yours, a workers co-op, cafe and creative hangout space, opened late last year on 43 Moray Place. Being anarchist and all, Yours does not place too much of an emphasis on financial quantitative transactions, instead opting for manaakitanga and relationship-building. Critic Te Ārohi sat down Read more...

Which Instant Noodle Are You?

Posted 2:14pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Jamiema Lorimer

You’re on campus and need a caffeine hit. Where are you getting it from? Cafe Albany I stopped in at my favourite coffee spot on the way in Can of Boss coffee from campus shop No matter where I am, I’ll be trekking it to Bagelo’s   How is Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Brother-in-law gets fucked hard (by the law)

Posted 1:58pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Critic

Is this sex related? No. At least not in a good way. But since I can’t afford therapy, winning a free sex toy from Critic for this story is as close as I’ll get.   The story begins back in October when I started receiving TikToks from my mates back home of a girl saying her Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 3

Posted 1:57pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Do something cute for yourself this week. It’s time for some much needed self-care. Get a fancy coffee or a sweet treat. Buy yourself something you definitely don’t need. You deserve it!  Drink for the week: Dirty Read more...

Chargrills: Meatballs and tzatziki

Posted 1:46pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Charly Burnett @chargrillss

Everyone loves a meaty ball, so birdbath this shit. Get out of the spa-ghetto and try meatballs without tomato sauce and with tzatziki instead. This is good tucka.   MEATBALL INGREDIENTS:   BASE 2 cups rice (or your choice of grain) 3 tbsp Read more...

Editorial: Give Me Burrito or Give Me Death

Posted 1:20pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Fox Meyer

Pretty much every culture in the world has independently invented the same four things: bladed weapons, fermentation, pigments, and a way to wrap dough around food.   I’m talking sandwiches. I’m talking kebabs, calzones, dumplings, gyros, and, of course, burritos. And it warms Read more...

Crate Review: Waikato Draught

Posted 1:13pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Albert Einsteinlager

As a Jaf-ugee, Crate Day always leaves me in a bit of a conundrum. On the one hand, I can try and claim Speights as my crate of origin, but I know deep in my heart I’m no Southern man. On the other hand, Lion Red is fucking disgusting. However, this year, I was saved the agonizing choice by my Read more...

Local Produce: What Does My Landlord Own?

Posted 12:50pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Zak Rudin

“What Does My Landlord Own?” is a website that allows users to enter an address and see other properties tied to that owner. The website was launched early this year by an anonymous team known as “sunset_flowers” determined to “help address the vast inequalities present Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The threesome that was never meant to be

Posted 2:43pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Critic

  It started off as any good sexual encounter would: we had all been drinking for three days straight and were feeling somewhere between delirium and death. I had been talking to one co-worker named Jimmy (not his real name) and feeling a bit promiscuous. We had spent the last few days Read more...

Local Produce: Pedals Dunedin

Posted 2:38pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Jamiema Lorimer

This week, Critic Te Ārohi caught up with our favourite biker gang: Pedals Dunedin. Pedals is Ōtepoti’s first and only bike courier service and easily the most friendly, in both the eco and literal sense. The Pedals team consists of Liam Harrison and Ashley Read more...

Chargrills: Thai Orange Chicken

Posted 2:30pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Charly Burnett @chargrillss

Pissed about the price of prawns? Give this chicken a crack. If this recipe was a famous person it would be Jonah Hill on 21 Jump Street. We’re talking missionary. We're talking when I'm on top and she's on her back. Good staple to start off with, but couldn't do it every time. Read more...

Editorial: Hide yo bongs, hide yo wife

Posted 2:14pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Fox Meyer

Bongs get stolen all the time. While this is objectively pretty funny, it highlights a particular problem created by the fact that weed is still illegal in this country. Set aside for a moment any problems you may have with the institution of law enforcement - a big ask, I know. But let’s Read more...

Booze Review: Billy Mav

Posted 2:08pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Albert Einsteinlager

Behind every jovial flat party, every electric scooter thrown through a glass window, and every deck that spews DnB onto the street...is Billy Maverick. He is the lifeblood of North Dunedin. If the Leith were to ever dry up, it would be replaced with bourbon and cola. Billy Mavs come exclusively Read more...

Horoscopes: Week 2

Posted 1:51pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 It’s time to be more intentional with your relationships. Sometimes you have a tendency to space out and miss life’s important moments. Be sure to work on this, as you have plenty of love to give.  Bad habit to break: Read more...

In the Eye of the Beholders Dunedin Art Reviews

Posted 1:16pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Fox Meyer

This column is supported by DPAG, but they have no influence on the reviews   Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out what the Read more...