ODT Watch | Issue 25
The Animal Issue
Shocking! Critic had always thought history was about the future.
In an insightful study, researchers found that by standing near the bar and looking at the bartender, you’re more likely to get served.
He is fine with humans; he just needs therapy for sneering at the gorillas, especially female gorillas. Critic feels he needs therapy for speciesism against his own kin. The gorilla is getting sent to rehab so that Zola, the famous break-dancing gorilla, can have its place. Critic isn’t sure which of them has more issues.
The family loved the horse so much that they did not realise it was missing until a few days after hearing a gunshot. On finding the horse (which was likely mistakenly shot by a hunter), they decided to put it down.
Continuing the animal theme, medical claims by New Zealanders travelling abroad over the past year include run-ins with monkeys, seals, and camera-chewing leopards.