Archive
Skuxx Food | Lemonade
Posted 2:07pm Saturday 24th September 2022 by Rosie Joyce @skuxxfood
The ultimate dust buster. Easy enough to make with only one brain cell. If you didn’t already know how to make lemonade, well, now you do. Vodka optional. Ingredients: Juice of 3 lemons ½ cup sugar 3 cups water 10 ice cubes Method: Add all Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 2:06pm Saturday 24th September 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week, we have an image supplied by Jeff. We got last week’s correct, Ellie was at Prospect Point, Vancouver. First thoughts: Looks like this photo was taken next to a populous harbour judging by the cargo ship in the background, possibly New Zealand? Analysing the size, shape Read more...
In the Eye of the Beholders | Dunedin Art Reviews
Posted 1:59pm Saturday 24th September 2022 by Esmond Paterson and Maddie Fenn
This column is supported by DPAG, but they have no influence on the reviews Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out what the piece Read more...
It’s Our Fault
Posted 1:20pm Saturday 24th September 2022 by Fox Meyer
It’s fun writing about the Alpine Fault now because at some point in our lifetime it’s going to be all anyone is talking about. It feels like writing about the Christchurch earthquakes before they actually happened, or writing about how easy it would be to block the Suez Canal before the Read more...
Moaningful Confessions | Too spicy
Posted 9:17pm Sunday 18th September 2022 by Critic
So, we met on Tinder, as it goes. She was something pretty special, so after a few dates I decided to show off my skills in the kitchen with a candlelit dinner. I wanted to blow her (away) so I made the most creamy and decadent mushroom risotto a girl could ask for. I even got oyster mushrooms and Read more...
Horoscopes: Week 23
Posted 9:11pm Sunday 18th September 2022 by Critic
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Aquarius, you should be proud of the progress you have made this year. Your journey of inner peace and comfort has been a great success, and you should give yourself a pat on the back for this. Crime to investigate: Which flatmate stole your Read more...
The RTDs are coming for you and your loved ones
Posted 8:54pm Sunday 18th September 2022 by Chug Norris
Absolut Lime and Soda beats the record for the most generic RTD ever produced, but it is not alone. RTDs are multiplying at an alarming rate. Wine and beer now cower in the corners of liquor store fridges as piles of multi-coloured boxes with generic names like Grins, Larry, Dave, and Brins spread Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 8:47pm Sunday 18th September 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week, we have a photo sent to us by Ellie. We got last week’s correct, Fox was indeed in Bryant Park on the 4th of December, 2019, hitting P.K. Subban in the nuts with a hockey puck. Shot, Fox. First thoughts: I see people, ships, a trail… Looks like Seattle or Read more...
In the Eye of the Beholders | Dunedin Art Reviews
Posted 8:42pm Sunday 18th September 2022 by Esmond Paterson and Maddie Fenn
This column is supported by DPAG, but they have no influence on the reviews Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out what the piece Read more...
Oh no please don’t stage a coup haha
Posted 7:20pm Sunday 18th September 2022 by Fox Meyer
Student politics are woefully exploitable. This week, there were meant to be six pages of profiles for the upcoming OUSA election, but they were cancelled literally the day before print because nobody had signed up to run for the positions. Yikes. That meant we had to fill six pages of content, Read more...
Moaningful Confessions | Tree hugger, butt fugger
Posted 7:14pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Critic
To preface, none of this was actually *meant* to happen, but here goes. So, this friend of a friend added me on Snapchat. Nothing major. I thought it was just a friendly thing – he ended up asking me to hook him up with some herbs, and we talked about that for a bit. Fast forward to Read more...
Horoscopes: Week 22
Posted 7:11pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Critic
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 You need to understand boundaries and really assess your importance in some people's lives. You tend to overstep and while you may mean well, it can come off as inappropriate to others. Goal for the week: hitting all your steps. Pisces Feb Read more...
Booze Review | Cody’s Bourbon and Cola is Criminally underrated.
Posted 7:01pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Chug Norris
Cody’s has many negative associations, several of which are fair. As previous booze reviews have mentioned, it is the drink of choice of 12 year-olds at skate parks throughout the country. For many, the drink is reminiscent of alcohol-fueled injuries and social decay. But these prejudiced Read more...
Skuxx Food | Tandoori Chicken Flatbreads
Posted 6:57pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Rosie Joyce @skuxxfood
If you miss the naanwich truck on campus, here’s something to fill that void. Serves 5 (2 each) Ingredients: 10 flatbreads/naan/wraps A few handfuls of baby spinach A bunch of coriander to garnish, optional Pickled onion: 1 red onion, thinly Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 6:54pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week, we have an image supplied by Fox. We got last week’s correct, Trish was in Lusthusportens park, Stockholm. First thoughts: Clearly a populous city, maybe some sort of event taking place around Christmas. Looks quite American. It’s clearly Christmas, and Read more...
In the Eye of the Beholders | Dunedin Art Reviews
Posted 6:50pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Esmond Paterson and Maddie Fenn
Callout: This column is supported by DPAG, but they have no influence on the reviews Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out what Read more...
Editorial: Embracing Indigenous Knowledge is the only way to get ourselves out of this mess
Posted 5:23pm Sunday 11th September 2022 by Annabelle Parata Vaughan (Ngāi Tahu)
Over the past 20 years, Aotearoa has made a more conscious effort to embrace te reo, tikanga and mātauranga Māori. Other parts of Aotearoa have made a conscious effort to double down on their racism, and drag the rest of us down with them. We’ve seen a revitalisation in the use of Read more...
Moaningful Confessions | Ted’s Bundy
Posted 8:40pm Saturday 3rd September 2022 by Critic
Being a broke Uni student, everyone does things to earn a little extra cash. For me, it was selling my body. A man, who we shall call Dave, who I’ve done a few things for, asked me one fateful evening if I could join in for a threesome. I kindly declined. However, I don’t think he got Read more...
Horoscopes: Week 21
Posted 8:38pm Saturday 3rd September 2022 by Critic
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Sometimes, your airheaded ways can cause you to drift off, leaving you un-present during conversations. Work on this and learn how to live in the moment, as this time of life is often so fleeting. Hangover cure: more shots. Pisces Feb 19 Read more...
Booze Review | Steinlager Pure makes an embarrassment of Steinlager Classic
Posted 8:33pm Saturday 3rd September 2022 by Chug Norris
Steinlager Pure is like the younger sibling that outshines their elder in every way. Despite the marketing for both drinks being so similar that even experienced piss fiends would confuse them, the Pure version of Steinlager is infinitely better than its Classic cousin. But the quality of Pure also Read more...
Skuxx Food | Chicken and Chorizo Paella
Posted 8:30pm Saturday 3rd September 2022 by Rosie Joyce @skuxxfood
If you’re feeling it, swap the chicken for prawns – this is more traditional and very skuxx. Simply add them during the last 5 minutes of cooking. I also like to chuck a seasonal green in there for #health, silverbeet or spinach works well! Serves 5 Ingredients: Olive Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 8:27pm Saturday 3rd September 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week, we have an image supplied by Trish. We got last issue’s submission correct: Chris was in section 266 of Capital One Arena, for the Roger Waters gig in Washington, D.C. We guessed just one level up, but the same section. First Thoughts: It’s gloomy, it’s dreary, Read more...
In the Eye of the Beholders | Dunedin Art Reviews
Posted 8:24pm Saturday 3rd September 2022 by Esmond Paterson and Maddie Fenn
Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out what the piece actually is before diving into their thoughts on the entire exhibition. You Read more...
These “Freedom of Speech” Protests Remind me a lot of Woodstock ’99
Posted 6:26pm Friday 2nd September 2022 by Fox Meyer
It was 1999: the leather was low-cut, the tensions were high, and the dreadlocks were very, very white. The original Woodstock co-founder decided to throw another event to promote “peace and love”, which ended in a fiery riot. The first red flag was that he decided to host the hippie Read more...
Moaningful_Confessions.txt | Robot rendezvous
Posted 5:29pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Critic
I had the most amazing rendezvous last night. I was out at the bar with a few friends when I spotted him across the room. He was tall, dark, and handsome, and I couldn't help but stare. I could tell he was interested too, because he kept making eye contact with me. After a couple of drinks, I Read more...
Roboscopes: Week 20
Posted 5:25pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Critic
We used an AI to generate these, but ran out of our free trial halfway through. You can see where we switched to a shittier free one. Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Once you've put yourself in the right frame of mind, you'll be ready to start flirting up a storm. Whether Read more...
Booze Review | Bavaria Dark 8.6ers are an atrocious drink, but at least they’re not a rip off
Posted 5:18pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Chug Norris
Some of the best things in life are free, but some of the worst things in life come in at 0.95 dollars per standard. It must be said: massive respect to Bavaria for being one of the few drinks other than goon that can consistently deliver golden ratio prices, but it has to be asked: is the misery Read more...
AI Food | Raspberry Pie
Posted 5:14pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Alan Turing
Disclaimer: This was written by an AI. We have no idea if it’ll work. If you end up trying it out, let us know how it goes. This raspberry pie recipe is so simple and delicious, and it comes with a heart-warming story about how I used to hate raspberry pie but came to love it. When I was Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 5:09pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week, we have an image supplied by Chris. We got last week’s submission correct, thanks to a last-minute bit of sleuthing by one of our reporters. Arlo was standing on Conwy Castle, in Llandudno Junction, Wales. First thoughts: Looks like the Hajj, but obviously not. Okay, stadium, Read more...
In the Eye of the Beholders | Dunedin Art Reviews
Posted 5:07pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Esmond Paterson and Maddie Fenn
Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out what the piece actually is before diving into their thoughts on the entire exhibition. You Read more...
AI is more – and less – scary than you think
Posted 2:50pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Fox Meyer
In this issue, every piece of art was initially designed by an AI. We used DALL·E 2 and Midjourney to create concept art, and then had our artists go back over that art to stylise it. If we learned anything from that process, it’s that AI won’t be replacing artists any time soon. Read more...
Moaningful Confessions | TRUE STORY! Nice Guy Gentleman Gets Laid! *NOT CRINGE AT ALL!*
Posted 3:18pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Critic
Once upon a summer's day, a beautiful princess was finishing her last exam. Her (not really) prince charming was waiting outside the exam room with a cup of tea, a packed lunch and his noble steed (Toyota people-mover with amazing fuel economy). It had been a couple of lonely days with the exam Read more...
Horoscopes: Week 19
Posted 3:15pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Critic
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Aquarius, you’ve been working hard, and getting your priorities in check. You are on the cusp of a new phase of your life. Keep taking the right steps forward, and keep your eyes on the prize. Healthy coping mechanism to try: making your coffee at Read more...
Booze Review | Scapegrace Pomegranate & Doris Plum is a Pretentious Money-Grab
Posted 3:09pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Chug Norris
There is only one way a person could come to buy Scapegrace’s Pomegranate and Doris Plum RTDs: fresh from an exhausting day of abusing retail workers and making disapproving noises about the homeless, your average Scapegrace consumer is in much need of refreshment. Getting home and realising Read more...
Skuxx Food | 4-ingredient pesto pasta
Posted 3:07pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Rosie Joyce @skuxxfood
Eat this hot or cold, lunch or dinner, drunk or sober. So versatile! Ingredients: 500 grams of pasta: if you’re making this as a salad, use short pasta, if eating hot, go long Around 200 grams of pesto A bag of spinach, roughly chopped Around 200 grams of Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 3:05pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week, we have an image supplied by Arlo. We got last week’s submission bang on, Jeremy was on the corner of Trgovke and Sarači in Sarajevo. First Thoughts: Right off the bat I’m going to guess somewhere near the UK. That’s a big area, and honestly, I’m Read more...
In the Eye of the Beholders | Dunedin Art Reviews
Posted 3:03pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Esmond Paterson and Maddie Fenn
Every week, we send two writers to an art exhibit in Ōtepoti Dunedin. One of them will choose a specific piece, and describe it to the other without them looking. They’ll try to figure out what the piece actually is before diving into their thoughts on the entire exhibition. You Read more...
You Don’t Have to be This Poor
Posted 1:23pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Fox Meyer
I’m going to make this exceptionally clear: you are not poor because you’ve made poor life choices. You are poor because there’s a student poverty crisis. It’s not like you enjoy it, right? Do you enjoy being in one of the most impoverished communities in Aotearoa? Read more...
Moaningful Confessions | Togal Catastrophe
Posted 8:08pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Critic
It was my first year at Otago Uni. I was freshly 18, still a virgin and O-week was coming up. I decided to go to toga with a couple of people I’d met that day. After more than a couple drinks, some shitty dancing and moving our way up in the crowd, I looked around only to realise I recognised Read more...
Moaningful Confessions | Mommy Milk
Posted 8:07pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Critic
So, pretty soon after I had broken up with my boyfriend, I decided to have a little hoe phase and met up with this guy. He was quite strange but he picked me up and we ended up going to a hotel (I have never felt more like a hooker in my life). For some reason he put on the Minion Movie and we Read more...
Donate Now: Save the rare Purple Goanna
Posted 8:05pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Chug Norris
It is difficult to review RTDs because they are all so generic. Unlike beer, they don’t have a certain type of person culturally associated with the drink; unlike spirits, they don’t have a unique or surprising new way of getting people wasted. RTDs are made for the lowest common Read more...
Skuxx Food | 10-minute Garlic Chilli Oil Noodles
Posted 8:03pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Rosie Joyce @skuxxfood
If you’re like me and your algorithm is purely food videos, chances are you will have seen this recipe on TikTok. Here’s my take on garlic chilli oil noodles. The perfect recipe to whip up for lunch, as it literally only takes 10 minutes. Serves Read more...
Horoscopes: Week 18
Posted 8:01pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Critic
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 Feeling depressed? Yeah, aren’t we all. Take some self-care time this week, and really reflect on your emotional wellbeing and relationships. Holiday to book: Bali. Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 Pisces have such an interesting way of Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 7:52pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week we have an image supplied by Jeremy. We were spot on with last week’s location, though it required an extraordinary stroke of luck; A was at the former site of Pizzahub, in Melbourne. First Thoughts: This looks very Eastern European: everything from the roofing to the hookah Read more...
Editorial: I went to the US and it was a fucking shambles
Posted 6:52pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Fox Meyer
I got to go home to the States for the first time since Covid broke out. And lemme tell ya, things are not going well. Nothing summed up the trip better than a lady in Des Moines, Iowa, who told me how the election was stolen and then followed it up with “oh but I love New Zealand, the Swiss Read more...
Moaningful Confessions | Indecent Exposure
Posted 4:53pm Sunday 31st July 2022 by Critic
It’s a Saturday in Dunedin. But this isn’t a story of a Saturday night where you go to a flat and get super wasted while eyeing up the person you want to end up fucking later. No, this story is different. It was the middle of the day – 12:34pm to be precise. I was working my shitty Read more...
Booze Review | Major Major Blended Kentucky Bourbon
Posted 4:49pm Sunday 31st July 2022 by Chug Norris
Let’s be honest, it really doesn’t take a lot of effort to make people buy alcohol in NZ. Major Major’s Blended Kentucky Bourbon drink is not a particularly innovative move by Asahi. They’ve just bought a bottle of bourbon and watered it down with some lemon soda. But Read more...
Skuxx Food | Pumpkin, spinach, chickpea curry
Posted 4:47pm Sunday 31st July 2022 by Rosie Joyce @skuxxfood
I’m sorry for neglecting the vegans for so long: make this meal 100% animal friendly by swapping the butter for oil, the cream for coconut cream and using vegetable stock. Serves 5 Ingredients: ⅓ of a pumpkin, cut into 3cm cubes Salt and pepper 25 grams Read more...
Horoscopes: Week 17
Posted 4:45pm Sunday 31st July 2022 by Critic
Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 NO, don’t order that UberEats! Get the fuck up and do your grocery shopping. And buy some kiwifruit while you’re there. When was the last time you took a shit that wasn’t pebbles? Tip to cure your seasonal depression: Make the flat a Sunday Read more...
Mr. Worldwide
Posted 4:40pm Sunday 31st July 2022 by Mr. Worldwide
This week, we have an image supplied by “A”. We nailed last week’s submission; Jeff was at the Three Sixty bar at the Hilton, St. Louis, Missouri. First thoughts: Looks like Aotearoa to me. I can see a railway crossing in the back, too. So it’s probably a Read more...
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