Mystery Object Hunt (August 21-27)

Posted 2:08pm Sunday 20th August 2017 by Critic

There’s a fairly wholesome week ahead, people! Enjoy the break.   Monday 21 August – Senior Citizens Day While the average Critic reader probably lacks the grey hair of today’s demographic, we all know of at least one senior citizen who deserves a medal. I for one Read more...

David Clark | Dunedin Hospital Update

Posted 11:00am Sunday 20th August 2017 by David Clark

The health system across Otago/Southland is struggling more than most – in fact, it’s creaking at its seams. There are likely to be many contributing causes to this current predicament, including the short-funding of health, and a funding model that seems to work against the South. But Read more...

Poetry Corner | institutional blues

Posted 1:22pm Sunday 20th August 2017 by Vanessa

    when theres shit in your shoes and ant it the news when youve done a u turn and noone takes turns left or right or in between no-ones saying  what they mean, institutional yellows like custard pudd, voices in my head saying do what you should but Read more...

The Hell Hole | Things that disgust me

Posted 12:42pm Sunday 13th August 2017 by Charlie O’Mannin

Cats with hands, kelp with hands, mould with eyes. Unanswered emails. Your toenail on your sheets. Falling into a wood chipper. A greasy coffee cup. Peeling your veins with a potato peeler. Balloons filled with mustard gas. Mugs with chipped rims. Teeth made out of porcelain. Anything smaller than a Read more...

Lucky in Love | Peas & Carrots

Posted 12:30pm Sunday 13th August 2017 by Lovebirds

Each week, we lure two singletons to The Bog Irish Bar, give them food and drink, then wait for their reports to arrive in our inbox. If this sounds like you, email: critic@critic.co.nz   Peas “I wonder if this is two standards,” I thought, contemplating the Read more...

Poetry Corner | (No Title)

Posted 12:52pm Sunday 13th August 2017 by Darude

Rotate Jolting with the pivot  as a roiling boil bubbles your  bloodstream too little, a tepid time bomb or else, volcanically explosive coating your cell with the splatter of mincemeat all will be resolved at the next flat meeting “Do we need a Read more...

Editorial | Do some art

Posted 10:18am Sunday 13th August 2017 by Lucy Hunter

It’s Art Week. Here’s one of my favourite quotes: “If something is worth doing, it’s worth doing badly.” G. K. Chesterton said that. Before you say that explains Critic, let me elaborate. If you adhere to the better-known version of the quote, “if something is Read more...

Science Tank | Cold Readers: The First Circle of Hell

Posted 1:00pm Sunday 13th August 2017 by Anon

It was 2010 and my father had passed away earlier that year. My usual logic blinded by grief, I did what any standard mourner would do and booked an appointment to see a medium. Walking into her home-cum-spiritual lair, I immediately noticed the tacky abundance of quartz crystals (when will people Read more...

ODT Watch | Issue 19

Posted 11:06am Sunday 13th August 2017 by Charlie O’Mannin

This week a mysterious event has thrown the ODT office into even more confusion, suspicion and vibration than normal.  Spontaneous combustion is just a normal day at the ODT. Unfortunately the flames were a curious beige-khaki. And wet. The ODT doesn’t like being wet. It reminds Read more...

Sage Advice | Art

Posted 1:05pm Sunday 13th August 2017 by Mat Clarkson

“The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls.” - Pablo Picasso   Art is... mysterious. Is it the physical embodiment of the human soul? Is it the pale reflection of a world we can never reach? Will the subtle genius of my Care Bears-themed erotic Read more...