Proctology

Proctology -28

Posted 2:42am Monday 17th October 2011 by Aimee Gulliver

In our last meeting of the year, the Proctor was very keen to “blow Campus Watch’s trumpet.” We were a bit taken back by this statement, but really what consenting adults get up to in their own time is none of our business. And Otago’s finest have been protecting the student community Read more...

Proctology - 24

Posted 5:08am Monday 19th September 2011 by Aimee Gulliver

Critic is starting to suspect the Proctor has mistaken us for Dr Dolittle, as we’re kicking off this week with yet another animal story – this time involving the exciting chase of a loose rabbit. At least it wasn’t a loose pussy; nobody would be interested in chasing that. Campus Watch were Read more...

Proctology - 21

Posted 11:40pm Monday 22nd August 2011 by Aimee Gulliver

The snow hadn’t been causing the Proctor too much trouble when Critic spoke to him, and he had even been deploying Campus Watch in a truck to drive people home safely. Critic immediately formed a completely inaccurate mental image of a pickup truck doing burnouts through the snow with bogan Castle Read more...

Proctology -19

Posted 4:52am Thursday 11th August 2011 by Aimee Gulliver

Critic hadn’t had a rendezvous with the Proctor since before the holidays, so we were expecting a good haul of stories when we strolled into his mighty chambers of justice. Disappointingly, Re-O Week seems to have been a relatively tame affair, with no stories of note from our favourite Read more...

Proctology -13

Posted 3:30am Wednesday 6th July 2011 by Aimee Gulliver

The Proctor had some words of wisdom to impart this week about “planking”, a recent fad that involves lying down with your arms by your sides in weird public places and photographing it. In short; don’t do it. There have apparently been some students planking around campus recently, Read more...

Proctology -11

Posted 8:27am Thursday 19th May 2011 by Aimee Gulliver

Despite the Proctor telling Critic that statistics would indicate that the standard of student behaviour is going up, a number of youthful delinquents around campus are still keeping him in a job. In a rare example of female misconduct, a flat of girls have been using a neighbouring Read more...

Proctology

Posted 4:15am Thursday 5th May 2011 by Gregor Whyte

After an absence of far too long, a whole eight issues in fact, Critic is proud to once again bring you Proctology. Critic’s first meeting with the Proctor was a nervy affair. After getting used to the familiar sight of TailGunner Joe, the Proctor was instantly suspicious of a new face, especially Read more...

Proctology - 27

Posted 1:04am Tuesday 12th October 2010 by Tailgunner Joe

Dunedin has a reputation for being damp and cold because university students are usually only here for the damp, cold part of the year; Dunedin’s shortish summers, falling between December and February, are actually quite pleasant. Every few years, however, they arrive pleasantly early, and so it Read more...

Proctology - 25

Posted 2:03am Monday 11th October 2010 by Tailgunner Joe

You may have noticed that a month has passed since the last Proctology. The reason for this is that the Proctor was on a road trip with his mates. They went to Christchurch and got up to no good, causing significant property damage and several injuries and necessitating a civil defence call-out. You Read more...

Proctology - 19

Posted 11:38pm Monday 9th August 2010 by Tailgunner Joe

he Proctor seemed to be having a bit of a slow week when I interviewed him, but as usual there were a couple of things exercising his mind: * Firstly, there have been “three or four” assaults on campus recently. These have been of the indecent rather than violent variety, although Read more...