Because who wouldn’t want to know which study spot you’d be reincarnated as in your next life? Here is a quick and effective procrastination tool which will leave you reflecting on your life’s journey, and all the choices that led up to this point.
Before everyone starts whining, Critic would like to give an honourable mention to the Health Science library. Unsure if it even exists, but whatever – prove us wrong. Sounds like a scary place, anyway. Pretty sure you get kicked out for whispering.
We’d also like to give a dishonourable mention to the Marsh Study Centre. We all know you don’t actually study there, and it was far better off when it was The Gardies. It’s impossible to get a seat there too. It is close to the Botans though, so that’s definitely cool.
1. It’s a typical Dunners morning (probs overcast). Which fit are you rocking to campus?
a. Jorts, button-up and a surfy cap (don’t forget the Birks)
b. Cute new Depop sweater and thrifted jeans
c. The North Face puffer and clogs
d. Retro footy shirt (fuck yeah, hard)
2. It’s your cooking night for the flat, what’s on the menu?
a. Nachos
b. Chicken & Tomato Pasta Bake
c. Thai Green Curry
d. Domino’s
3. You’re deep in the study grind, and one of your mates suggests a study-break. Where to?
a. Miga Hako (Rice Balls in Link)
b. Back to the flat (walk break)
c. I’m staying put – I’ve got heaps of shit on, mate
d. UniPol to get a quick pump in
4. It’s 2036, you’re graduated and famous. You have agreed to a biography written about you. What's a key event that has shaped you as a person?
a. Buying a steak from Pak’n’Save
b. Witnessing Daniel Leamy become OUSA President (wtf)
c. Your first heartbreak
d. $9 pints at Pint Night
ANSWERS
Mostly A’s: Central Library
You really can’t go wrong with Cench. You’re dependable, well-liked and always there when needed most. If it’s not broken, why fix it? It’s the place to be for a reason – the heart of scarfie ‘study’, if you will. Just be careful to not get a glare from a third year when you start gossiping after inevitably running into your mate instead of locking in.
Mostly B’s: Science Library (& St Dave’s)
Ah, yes. If Central was Batman, the Science Library might be Robin. But don’t underestimate the Boy Wonder, he has plenty to offer – just like you. Bonus points for the view from St Dave’s. But you’re not just a pretty face. This library is nice and close to many flats, plus usually has a few more free seats around exam season. It’s an easy place to hang out in, similar to how you’re easy to hang out with.
Mostly C’s: Law Library (Richardson Building)
Wow, you know how to get into the Law Library? Sick. Despite having the best views on campus, maybe try chilling out a little. Then you could look good and feel good. It’s ok though, law is clearly the most intensive degree, and anyone who doesn’t get that frankly isn’t worth listening to anyway. Props to you braving the haunted elevator there (or having insane glutes from the stairs).
Mostly D’s: Robertson Library
Often slept on, the Robertson can be a legendary spot. The laid-back chill vibes can be conducive to a solid study sesh, and it’s quite a cool building with lots of nice sunlight. You likely recognise the need for balance, with an easygoing demeanor. What’s the point of going into crippling student debt if you’re not having fun along the way? Grab your matcha from Fluid and remember studying is less punishing if you look aesthetic.
