Proctology | Issue 21

Proctology | Issue 21

Microbiology building excites some people more than others

Once again, the Proctor has had reports of misbehaviour at the Botanic Gardens in recent weeks; there have been two particularly large groups who have been caught drinking in the gardens. The Proctor said that one group swiftly left the gardens once Campus Watch arrived, but the other group was “not quite as compliant.” The group consisted of over 30 “problematic first years from the halls.” The Proctor understood that it was possible that the students were not aware that alcohol is “not a good look in the gardens,” but despite this the students have been forced to make large donations towards the gardens to cover costs such as the clean up of bottles, vomit, and urine, as well as the repair of damaged flowers.

There have been additional problems at Woodhall gardens with “barrels of beer” being drunk in the gardens. Families have reported the unwanted crowd to Campus Watch and the Proctor has advised that students stay away from any of the gardens when drinking.

In more penis-related reports, a middle-aged man was caught on CCTV in the microbiology building pleasuring himself. The police released an image of him on the Dunedin Police Facebook page, which garnered enough attention to identify him. He has been charged with committing an “indecent act.” He has also been trespassed from University buildings and grounds. When asked what the sentencing for the charges usually consist of, the Proctor said it depends on the person’s history. He was unaware of the man’s history of indecent acts, either publically or privately.

Another student has been charged with “unlawfully interfering with a vehicle.” Campus Watch caught the intoxicated man trying to move a scooter from a flat’s front lawn to the other side of the road. He told the Proctor that it was “just for fun,” and nothing more sinister. The Proctor said that “in this particular instance,” they chose to believe him rather than indulging the possibility that he was committing theft.

There have other vehicle related incidents, including one student who had their windscreen wipers stolen. The Proctor said that when he asked the offender why he took them, “he really didn’t seem to know.” In a separate incident, the wing mirror of another car was kicked off the car at a college car park.
The Police are also trying to find the person or persons responsible for breaking windscreens and slashing tyres around Dunedin recently. A number of tyres were damaged on cars parked in South Dunedin areas, and other cars have had their windscreens smashed in Shiel Hill, Andy Bay, Musselburgh, and St Kilda, potentially by someone firing a BB gun.

The Proctor felt it was a “real shame” any vehicle damage was committed by any students especially because, “quite often the damage is towards cars belonging to fellow students.”
This article first appeared in Issue 21, 2014.
Posted 5:55pm Sunday 31st August 2014 by Josie Cochrane.