“He had reheated the pie in a 630W microwave at his workplace, as he had many times before,” the article says. The rest was dotted with such gems as “[Otago’s] hot food injury rates begin to boil over,” while “hot food injury rates cooled nationally,” which Critic would like to point out are literally the same joke but reversed. And let’s not forget that “Southland’s statistics simmered” – naturally, the way you’d further this metaphor into stagnation.
Cue a very, very slow clap. The context? Braden Currie won back-to-back Longest Day titles during the Coast to Coast race.
You’ll learn to pronounce it correctly after five attempts, and you’ll somewhat understand it after ten. The story is actually quite awful – that the practice of clubbing unwanted calves to death is resulting in some arriving at processing plants not quite dead. Perhaps the seemingly nonsensical title is just a very clever form of censorship.
Yes, ODT. Your sub editor should probably cast their eyes over your headlines, too.
We jumped at this – though, what’s more intriguing than the ODT breaking something as huge as this scoop was the prowess with which the lengthy court case was hidden – but then we realised that we had found ourselves in Florida, thanks to the ODT’s token “World” page. Oh, and it’s “Dunne” with an “e.”
