![Unwanted visitor terrifying](http://www.critic.co.nz/content/2013/i26/odt/1.jpg)
No, the Queen wasn’t talking about John Key’s visit. The article is about wasps being accidentally introduced into New Zealand for no purpose whatsoever, much like tofu.
![Students make easy targets](http://www.critic.co.nz/content/2013/i26/odt/2.jpg)
Funnily enough, the ODT isn’t referring to its own reporting. The title actually refers to Dunedin’s latest string of burglaries.
![Bombs in Baghdad](http://www.critic.co.nz/content/2013/i26/odt/3.jpg)
In breaking news … a bomb went off in Baghdad! It is an issue that has rarely troubled Iraq’s capital, so Critic is ever so proud that our local rag is undertaking such courageous and timely reporting.
!['Westie' claims $33m](http://www.critic.co.nz/content/2013/i26/odt/4.jpg)
The self-proclaimed “westie” won $33 million from a lucky second division win. It was a “Must Be Won” draw so the winnings roll down to the next division. He went to the gym prior to collecting his cash monies, just in case his Powerball winnings distracted him from his exercise.
![Texting will not help you sleep](http://www.critic.co.nz/content/2013/i26/odt/5.jpg)
In more useful and up-to-date studies discussed by the ODT, it is revealed that sleeping is, in fact, easier when you don’t text back the midnight booty call.