Archive
“I Sold My Underwear Online and Used the Money to Buy Pokémon”
Posted 8:56pm Thursday 15th March 2018 by Caroline Moratti
Matilda* is your typical Instagram art hoe. Never seen without her kanken, her embroidered dungarees and Vincent van Gogh socks, we’ve all seen variations of her around campus. But behind the lens of her yellow Polaroid camera lies a more twisted version of reality. Matilda sold her used Read more...
Sleep Paralysis - it's fucking terrifying
Posted 9:05pm Thursday 8th March 2018 by Maddie Grant
One night when I was 17, I woke up in the middle of the night and I couldn’t move my body. I’m talking about not even being able to open my fucking eyes. So I just lay there, thinking “FUCK FUCK FUCK Am I dead? Am I having a nightmare? Did I somehow break my neck and Read more...
Le Tour de Goon
Posted 6:11pm Thursday 8th March 2018 by Callum Doyle
“Oh shit, watch out!” A cylcist with more confidence than ability had smashed into a girl, and she was lying down, unmoving. “Shit I’m going to be in an ODT article about dead students, aren’t I?” was my only thought as we rushed to her. Luckily, my fears were Read more...
Can Assuming Bogan Characteristics Enhance Performance While Surfing? A Scientific Expedition
Posted 6:02pm Thursday 8th March 2018 by Sam Fraser-Baxter
Hello Zukeen magazine is a Dunedin-based arts and culture publication. It’s silly, sexy and stupid. It’s all about young people doing rad shit. If you enjoy any of the following, chances are you’ll enjoy Hello Zukeen: waves, cool noises, people riding things, art, exceptional Read more...
Ancient Greeks: We Disguised Ourselves as Freshers and Infiltrated the Toga Party.
Posted 6:16pm Saturday 3rd March 2018 by Erin Broughton
‘Otago’ is one letter and a tiny word scramble away from ‘Toga’. Taking this as a prophetic sign, we sent two Critic writers who are way too old for this shit to coat their baggy eyes with foundation, rip up some sheets, and brave the iconic event that is the Toga Read more...
69 Things You Absolutely Should Not Do At University
Posted 6:13pm Saturday 3rd March 2018 by Critic
Don’t do a ‘survey’ for a Christian group; they’re not researching anything, they just want to convert you. And there won’t be any sex. Don’t go to a ‘Landers game in any section but the Zoo: old people are terrible company. Unless they smell like Read more...
Chronicles of Castle: 7 Days of O-Week on NZ’s Biggest Party Street
Posted 6:10pm Saturday 3rd March 2018 by Charlie O’Mannin
As one of the two truly iconic party streets of North Dunedin, Castle is locked in a never ending tussle with Hyde to prove their status as the true home of O-Week. It’s hectic, as parties spill onto the street and combine into a frothing melee of noise, dancing and vomit. We sent a Read more...
Judith Collins: Critic Takes on the Crusher
Posted 4:30pm Saturday 24th February 2018 by Joel MacManus
Judith Collins is a pit bull, with a no-nonsense attitude and a badass nickname to boot. ‘The Crusher’ is a moniker she originally picked up as Justice Minister for her policy of crushing boy racers’ cars, but soon came to represent her entire brand of politics. Among the Read more...
The Tindersurfer
Posted 4:28pm Saturday 24th February 2018 by Chelle Fitzgerald
Tindersurfing: (noun) The act of travelling around the world while finding accommodation only through the app “Tinder”. For 25-year-old Belgian Anthony Botta, “every day is a date”. That’s the slogan of his YouTube channel, Zebotta Official, where he documents his Read more...
Inside Initiations, or How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love the Vom
Posted 4:26pm Saturday 24th February 2018 by Joel MacManus
Initiations; along with rugby at the Zoo, blacking out at Hyde Street, and shamefully hustling a dubious conquest out of your flat, they’re one of North Dunedin’s most time honoured traditions. You gather up whoever is moving into your shitty flat next year, force a few drinks down Read more...
Ta Moko: The Tattoos of a Culture
Posted 12:17pm Sunday 8th October 2017 by Chelle Fitzgerald
Arriving at the Moana Moko studio, I spied my friend Alan lying peacefully on a bed, as tohunga ta moko (tattooist) Stu McDonald worked steadily on Alan’s ta moko (Māori tattoo). The Moray Place studio was spacious and high-ceilinged, with wooden floors and pleasant roots music playing. I Read more...
What is behind New Zealand’s high suicide rate?
Posted 12:02pm Sunday 8th October 2017 by Zahra Shahtahmasebi
Content warning: contains discussion of suicide Our country has one of the highest suicide rates in the Western world, and the highest youth (15-24 years old) suicide rate in the OECD. The latest suicide statistics, released by the Chief Coroner in late August, showed that the number of Read more...
Smile, You’re on Camera
Posted 11:51am Sunday 8th October 2017 by Jean Balchin
Imagine this: it’s early on a Sunday morning, and the sun is streaming in the window. It’s obnoxiously bright, and rouses you from your slumber; entangled up in a bed that isn’t yours. Who is that person snoring beside you? Where on earth are you? And why does your head hurt so Read more...
Extreme Haunted Houses
Posted 10:53am Saturday 30th September 2017 by Lucy Hunter
“People piss themselves, shit themselves,” says Rory Foley casually as he shows us through the empty prison. Foley delights in terrorising people, for charity. It’s a grim place to walk around. The Dunedin Prison was completed in 1896 and used for over a century until its Read more...
Scarfie in a Strange Land
Posted 10:41am Saturday 30th September 2017 by Isaac Yu
Time is a wheel. Being someone of Korean descent who represents New Zealand on the JET Programme (Japanese Exchange and Teaching meant to improve international relations), living in Japan is a surreal experience. On one hand, their ancestors conquered mine and instituted an oppressive police state Read more...
The History of Initiations at Otago University
Posted 12:33pm Sunday 24th September 2017 by Joel MacManus
With the student ghetto, couch burning, broken bottles and the Hyde St party, it’s easy to villianise modern student behaviour. However, in contrast with their parents, grandparents, and greatgrandparents, students these days are angels. Joel Macmanus reports on the dangerous and disgusting Read more...
An A-Z of people that exist
Posted 11:46am Sunday 24th September 2017 by Chelle Fitzgerald
Awkward Weed Dealer. “How’s it goin mate,” he greets you as he takes you down to the back room that he rents at his brother in law’s house. As you gaze around his room, your eyes are assaulted by the dusty collection of Jack Daniel’s and Jim Beam shot glasses and Read more...
Bang!
Posted 11:43am Sunday 24th September 2017 by Lucy Hunter
When did you last ask your mum about her sex life? Melody Thomas did it on national radio. Bang! is a Radio New Zealand podcast series on sex, sexuality and relationships. Real people tell real stories about their sex lives to producer Melody Thomas. Thomas loves audio storytelling. A lot of Read more...
Go Well, Celia
Posted 12:38pm Sunday 17th September 2017 by Hannah Herchenbach
The first time I saw Celia Mancini was on celluloid. Three years ago, my flatmates and I headed out in the rain to catch a screening of Margaret Gordon’s documentary about the Christchurch band Into the Void at Alice’s, a theatre in the centre of town that holds about 30 Read more...
Rethinking your Drinking
Posted 12:25pm Sunday 17th September 2017 by Zane Pocock
Zane Pocock is a former Critic editor and the COO of Hello Sunday Morning, a charity that develops campaigns and technology to help people change their relationship with alcohol. In the past year, much has been made of improving behaviour in the student quarter. Couches have enjoyed a Read more...

