Critical Tribune: Fresher Gets Quick Lesson In Tenancy Law After Falling Out With Friend Group They Signed With In January

Posted 10:59pm Saturday 4th October 2025 by Anna Marrs

Critical Tribune has received several news tips over the past couple of weeks complaining about the “absolute state” of tenancy law. Turns out, signing a contract with your mates halfway through first sem isn’t a committed display of the fact you’ll love each other forever, Read more...

Critical Tribune: University declares state of emergency as brainrot spreads across campus

Posted 11:01pm Sunday 28th September 2025 by Gear Sloppit

The University of Ota-goon has announced an Official State of Emergency after a “catastrophic outbreak” of brainrot left hundreds of students unable to form original sentences, instead communicating exclusively through TikTok sounds and vintage Tumblr quotes. In a press conference Read more...

Critical Tribune: Breather attends a lecture in person and discovers he really likes it

Posted 5:20pm Sunday 7th September 2025 by Matt Hilda

“I didn’t really know what the bros were up to during the day,” Zack admitted. “They were always off to go see David, or Burns. Even when they said they were at Castle 2, I went over to the flat on Leith and the boys just told me to fuck off. I felt a bit left Read more...

Critical Tribune: The Most Insufferable Person You Know Becomes LinkedIn Influencer

Posted 10:29pm Sunday 24th August 2025 by Anderson Coomer

The sound of students audibly sighing across Dunedin last week was recorded as a magnitude of 1.9. This disturbance comes after the most insufferable person you know is now a LinkedIn influencer. Sora Noying, a fifth-year law and politics student, who is more commonly known amongst acquaintances as Read more...

Critical Tribune: LEAKED! OIA Reveals Otago is Legally Obligated to Hire Unelected Politicians

Posted 9:59pm Sunday 18th May 2025 by Anderson Coomer

Emails released under the Official Information Act (OIA) have revealed that the University of Otago has entered into a legally binding agreement with the Labour Party to hire politicians that don’t get elected.  The official document stated that the University was required to Read more...

Activist Rodent Learns What Neoliberalism Means

Posted 4:45pm Tuesday 13th May 2025 by Anderson Coomer

Thousands of people in the Southern Region were left without internet access on Wednesday 16 April following an incident of a rodent chewing through a fibre cable after being radicalised into an anarcho-primitivist agenda through a mix of “hot Leninist goths” and “Into the Wild Read more...

Critical Tribune: Many upset after Critic says, “Well, you’re not invited to my birthday party”

Posted 9:54pm Sunday 6th April 2025 by Billary Harry

Within the past months many readers, staff, University affiliates, and OUSA, have been excited about Critic turning 100 years old, as well as the party that would come along with it.  Editor Nina had been overheard saying there would be “super cute party games” like pass the Read more...

Third-year Wellness Influencer Insists Her Bag is Ethically Sourced

Posted 9:19pm Sunday 23rd March 2025 by Anderson Coomer

Local third-year Food Science and Nutrition Student student Molly Edwards, a self-proclaimed fitness and wellness influencer, who preaches the benefits of clean-eating, early morning runs and therapeutic properties of Saunas on her Instagram account (@MolsHolistic) put a pause on her ‘daily Read more...

Breatha Exiled from Castle St Flat After Admitting, “I don’t fuck with DnB that much bro.”

Posted 4:44pm Sunday 16th March 2025 by Anderson Coomer

Alex, a second-year student, formerly known by his peers as ‘Fridge’ has been reduced to being known as ‘Champ’ in a turn of events that resulted in his tenancy being informally terminated at his Castle St flat. This follows a shocking admission, whereby Alex firmly stood Read more...

Vaping Students Used in Lieu of Smoke Machine for Ori’

Posted 4:24pm Sunday 2nd March 2025 by Tina Frowns

In lieu of an available smoke machine for Ori’ 2025, OUSA roped in a group of 100 or so students to continually blow vape clouds from either side of the Union Lawn stage. Volunteers (who the Critical Tribune has been assured were fully consenting) were recruited at OUSA’s annual Tent Read more...