Critical Tribune: Dragon Causes Damage To St David’s Building

Posted 4:05pm Saturday 8th August 2026 by Claudia Rivera

Students trying to start the lock-in early last week might have had a bit of a shock when a 20-metre-long Western dragon decided to set up shop atop St Dave’s. According to a statement from University Property Services, the dragon left “minimal” damage to the building, which was a Read more...

Critical Tribune: Landlords Advertise Mould As “Heritage Feature”

Posted 9:10am Saturday 18th July 2026 by Saraia Allais

Local property managers in North Dunedin have begun rebranding black mould as a “heritage feature”, with one manager stating that “black mould is just such an ugly term for a local treasure”. The change follows an increase in complaints from students expecting rental Read more...

Critical Tribune: University Confirms Plans to Construct Campus Ice Rink

Posted 4:11pm Saturday 11th July 2026 by Grey-Finn Cockley

According to a statement from the University to Critical Tribune, the ice rink (included in fees from Semester Two onwards) will “reduce seasonal depression, boost morale and give physio students something to do other than keg stands.” Critical Tribune speculates that this foray into Read more...

Critical Tribune: Breatha Raises Hand in Class

Posted 1:29pm Sunday 19th April 2026 by Dildo Connor

Second year breatha, Shooda Sckipt, was sat in his Tuesday morning lecture last week. Talking to Critical Tribune reporters, Shooda recounted that he had “surprisingly mustered up the courage” to make it to a lecture for a class that had an upcoming midterm assignment – no small Read more...

Critical Tribune: Hyde Street Party 2026 Flat Themes Unveiled

Posted 4:09pm Saturday 11th April 2026 by Dyldo Connor

As Otago students return from mid-sem break, speculation from the shitposters of the Castle26 Facebook group has been at an all time high. Critical Tribune is here to put the rumors to bed and confirm the official Hyde Street Party flat themes. Critical Tribune investigative journalists spoke to Read more...

Critical Tribune: STI Rates Plummet in North D as Castle Clears Out for Exams

Posted 2:24pm Monday 13th October 2025 by Mary Fartin Benz

Reports from frightened freshers have highlighted the concerning increase in Butter hats and Birks across Central Library’s floors. “I didn’t know they knew where campus was!” said Tim, a first-year and future breatha from Studholme, telling Critical Tribune he’s Read more...

Critical Tribune: Fresher Gets Quick Lesson In Tenancy Law After Falling Out With Friend Group They Signed With In January

Posted 10:59pm Saturday 4th October 2025 by Anna Marrs

Critical Tribune has received several news tips over the past couple of weeks complaining about the “absolute state” of tenancy law. Turns out, signing a contract with your mates halfway through first sem isn’t a committed display of the fact you’ll love each other forever, Read more...

Critical Tribune: University declares state of emergency as brainrot spreads across campus

Posted 11:01pm Sunday 28th September 2025 by Gear Sloppit

The University of Ota-goon has announced an Official State of Emergency after a “catastrophic outbreak” of brainrot left hundreds of students unable to form original sentences, instead communicating exclusively through TikTok sounds and vintage Tumblr quotes. In a press conference Read more...

Critical Tribune: Breather attends a lecture in person and discovers he really likes it

Posted 5:20pm Sunday 7th September 2025 by Matt Hilda

“I didn’t really know what the bros were up to during the day,” Zack admitted. “They were always off to go see David, or Burns. Even when they said they were at Castle 2, I went over to the flat on Leith and the boys just told me to fuck off. I felt a bit left Read more...

Critical Tribune: The Most Insufferable Person You Know Becomes LinkedIn Influencer

Posted 10:29pm Sunday 24th August 2025 by Anderson Coomer

The sound of students audibly sighing across Dunedin last week was recorded as a magnitude of 1.9. This disturbance comes after the most insufferable person you know is now a LinkedIn influencer. Sora Noying, a fifth-year law and politics student, who is more commonly known amongst acquaintances as Read more...