Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Directed by Jonathan Liebesman

Rating: B+

I like movies that don’t require a whole lot of cerebral activity, because all of my available neurons go toward passing my classes. However, TMNT was hilarious, in an “I can’t believe these are 21st century graphics” sort of way.

Let’s start with the obvious, shall we? The turtles. Dudes are ‘roided up. I was never a huge fan of the cartoon as a kid, but I am fairly certain they aren’t supposed to be a potential source of terror (until they start with the kitschy teenage dialogue and angst). And there’s just something about them that doesn’t look quite real. They don’t quite fit with their surroundings. Okay, they are six-and-a-half feet of mutant turtle, but they still don’t look real enough. And don’t even get me started on Master Splinter! Taught himself ninjutsu from a textbook, my ass!

Having ranted about the steroided superturtles and their odd graphics let me say that I do find the character development charmingly funny. I giggled a few times, and I finished the movie thinking that Michelangelo was kind of adorable. Rafael was an awesome big bro, Donatello works the badass nerd thing, and Leonardo is an all-round good guy. Megan Fox’s character April develops a bit as well, though I spent most of the film trying to figure out what was different about her. She plays a passable heroine though, which I guess is all anyone can ask for in a movie about ninja superturtles.

No, my real issue with this film were the parallels to other films. Hey, glowing green serum that transformed four itty bitty turtles into giants? Ahem … Hulk. Some sort of chemical bomb to be launched from the top of a pharmaceutical corporation’s roof in New York, which will level the population? Ahem … Spiderman. And finally, the whole Master Shredder/Master Splinter thing was a tad too Darth Vader/Yoda to be any sort of original? Cue heavy mouth breathing.

Overall, it was an all right film. The action sequences were pretty good, and they nailed the male, teenaged personalities shtick. I’ll probably buy it when it comes out, not sure fans of the show will emerge from the theatre happy, though.
This article first appeared in Issue 26, 2014.
Posted 1:49pm Sunday 5th October 2014 by CJ O'Connor.