Culture

1. You've rolled out of bed and stumbled to the kitchen. What are you having for the most important meal of the day?

1. Porridge. It’s filling, homely, and makes you feel like one of the grandparents from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
2. It's pretty much lunch time, so may as well just have a sandwich or something, you're no good at cooking anyway.
3. Toast because it's the fastest thing you can think of and you are running late to being half an hour early to your lecture
4. You're the Dunedin equivalent of a Michelin star chef, so on today's menu is fried eggs on toast with Wattie’s spaghetti
5. Some granola because, let's face it, you're granola

2. It's time to go to the biggest fashion show in Dunedin… campus! What are you wearing?

1. Your fave fleece quarter zip and a trusty pair of corduroy pants – they’re like sweatpants but business casual
2. A hoodie and the cleanest pair of pants you can find – they’re probably dirty by someone else's standards but gaf
3. Your new top and some slacks but you'll probably get food all over yourself so you make sure to bring a jacket
4. Jorts and a band tee, as well as some killer shoes that you found at the thrift on the weekend (trying not to think about the previous owner wearing them)
5. Some trackies and a wind breaker because Dunedin is an unruly place with unruly weather

3. On your way to class you pass by a poster that piques your interest. What is the poster about?

1. Well a book club of course, but a raunchy book club, none of that Dune crap – we’re all about smut here
2. A climate change protest. It's honestly so sad that your generation just doesn't seem to care about anything… you are brought to tears (which consequently raises the sea level)
3. A medical study for students to make $300 just by switching from vaping to nic patches; you know you should give up and a quick bit of coin is always nice
4. A ‘Know Your Stuff’ poster about drug testing. You've got a big weekend coming up and are gonna be trying some new treats (if you know what I mean)
5. A new hutt is opening in Dunedin and OUTC has gotten their members a student discount (must remember to sign up for OUTC)

4.  You're in the most boring lecture of your life and suddenly you’re opening coolmathgames.com. What are you playing?

1. Fireboy and Watergirl in the forest temple, but you can do it by yourself because you are a strong, independent rat
2. You mindlessly scroll because there are too many options and nothing piques your interest. Suddenly the end of the lecture is rolling around and you didn't learn or play anything.
3. Papa’s Wingeria, because doing a degree isn't hard enough, you also need to run a business all by yourself from your laptop
4. Pou, which is obviously the best game there is. You've been playing it since you were thirteen and are loyal to your alien pet.
5. WorldGuessr, because seeing images of interesting places from all over the globe helps motivate you to get the fuck out of Dunedin

5. It’s evening now. What do you do to wind down at night?

1. Take a long shower after it’s ticked over to free power and curling up with your comfort show
2. Put on the saddest movie ever, Up, and have a PHAT cry, you have been holding the tears for wayyyyy too long
3. Hang out in the lounge with your flatties, purely because of the warmth from the heat pump
4. Your pre-sleep cone, cook a big feed, and tell your flatmates you'll clean it up in the morning
5. Plan out some adventures with your mates, can't wait till the slopes open up again

6. Imagine your perfect sleeping conditions. Describe it in three words.

1. Hot water bottle!
2. Quiet, comfy, and cold
3. Post sex slumber
4. Podcast and mink blanket
5. Tent, sleeping-bag and mat

Answers

Mostly A’s: The House ‘Mouse’ 

You're the kinda rat who is sick of the rat race and prefers to take your lectures in bed and at 2x speed. You got an electric blanket for Christmas and have been using that puppy all day, every day since you got back to the hustle and bustle of Dunedin life. When all your friends are going out, you prefer to stay home and rot on the couch. When you can be swayed to have a few bevvies you ALWAYS sack it before town because everyone knows pres are the best part of the night anyway.

Mostly B’s: The Crying Rat 

Everything always weighs very heavily on you, and your emotions always seem to simmer to the top of the pot. It's not your fault that you feel everything so much and that every other rat in this town doesn't have the emotional intelligence that you do. You're best known for encouraging the weekly drunk “I love you so much, man” circles in club bathrooms. Make sure you drink some water to stay hydrated after all the tears. 

Mostly C’s: The Stress Swap Rat

Life has constantly got you down and, as a rat with the uncanny ability to commit yourself to about 15 extra-curricular activities, you never have the chance to sit down and have a moment to yourself. You have the tremendously bad (and gross) habit of nibbling your nails down to the flesh but it's purely for the nutritional value because you are obviously too swamped with uni, work, and errands to cook yourself a decent meal.

Mostly D’s: The Ripper Rat

You're just a simple rat. All you need to survive is a roof over your head, some cheese to nibble on, and your beloved bong. A wake and bake is the only way to live and you love to experiment on the weekends with different strains or hitting a good Jedi-flip to round out your week. While you love your degree, you often can’t get out of bed in time for your 10am lectures – but you'll always hustle a good grade in an exam thanks to your flatmate’s ritz.

Mostly E’s: The Outdoor Rat

You’re not like the others – you prefer to break free of the cage, getting off the hamster wheel and going somewhere. You're a wild bush rat and can't handle being in the concrete jungle of Dunedin for longer than you need to be. After your lectures, you scurry back to your flat in the North East Valley to chill. You're also either a vegetarian or have a freezer full of venison that you shot personally, as well as always having a tent and sleeping bag airing out in the lounge (your flatmates hate this, please put it away).