Archive

North Islander Discovers the Hype Behind Cheese Rolls

Posted 9:35pm Monday 26th April 2021 by The Critical Tribune

In a stunning and unexpected U-turn hailed as a new dawn for inter-island relations, a North Islander tried a cheese roll and understood just why South Islanders love it so much.  James, who was born and bred in Palmerston North, has been a student at Otago for the last four years. Despite Read more...

Horoscope

Posted 9:32pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Critic

Aquarius Jan 20 - Feb 18 There are plenty of fish in the sea, stop catching feelings. Accessory of choice: chokers Pisces Feb 19 - Mar 20 Keep doing your hot pisces shit, don’t let anyone steal your energy this week baby. Accessory of choice: new shoes Aries Mar 21 - Read more...

EDITORIAL: Please someone open a bakery near campus

Posted 12:15pm Monday 26th April 2021 by Erin Gourley

Look I don’t really understand how businesses work and I’m not going to pretend I do. This is less of a valid opinion, and more of a personal fantasy of mine. My demand is simple: I want a bakery near campus. Not a cafe with overpriced scones and slices. A bakery that is overflowing Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | The Effortless Threesome

Posted 1:53am Monday 19th April 2021 by Critic

Flashback to 2017. It’s my first year at Otago University (I transferred from Canterbury because my life there was as flat as the city’s landscape).  It’s a Thursday night and I’m bored so I send an “upto” to someone I used to go to high school with. Lo Read more...

Dear Critic...

Posted 1:50am Monday 19th April 2021 by Critic

Dear Critic, There’s a wasp nest in front of our flat. Every time I walk out, I’m terrified that I’m gonna get stung. Our landlord said we could just call some ecology students and they’d pull it out, but I highly doubt that. What do we do? Shawn   Gidday Read more...

Rate or Hate

Posted 1:45am Monday 19th April 2021 by Sasha Freeman

Rate Cooking a meal on your kitchen floor because all the bench space has dishes on it. Sounds gross but is actually a quintessential experience  Margaret Atwood: She can write anything, can’t believe she’s still alive  The garlic bread they sell at stilettos. Read more...

Fuck, I Can’t Cook!

Posted 1:40am Monday 19th April 2021 by Alice Taylor

Crispy satay tofu  I am very passionate about this week’s recipe. It’s difficult to mess it up an delicious. I have been known to pour this sauce into a bowl, microwave it, and eat it with a spoon. I have served the sauce here with crispy fried tofu, but you could pour it over Read more...

Booze Reviews: Cocktail Research and Development

Posted 1:33am Monday 19th April 2021 by Chug Norris

Having already acquired my alcohol for Hyde and not ready to buy anything else for the week, I decided to scrounge the little alcohol I had and try out a few wacky combinations. Mostly they were better than the original ingredients. Triple Brown The Triple Brown consists of a Double Brown with Read more...

Millions of Questions, But Nobody AskedOtago How It Was Feeling

Posted 1:29am Monday 19th April 2021 by The Critical Tribune

AskOtago is reportedly on the brink of a nervous breakdown after, despite having answered millions of student questions since it opened on the ground floor of Central in 2018, nobody asked it how it was really doing.  The helpdesk service has been struggling to cope emotionally for years, Read more...

Judith Collins Eyes Vice-Chancellorship

Posted 1:28am Monday 19th April 2021 by The Critical Tribune

After a slew of dismal polling numbers and backstabbing within the National Party, Leader of the Opposition Judith “Crusher” Collins is in talks with Otago Uni executives for the vacant role of Vice-Chancellor. Whispers of yet another leadership change in the National Party have Read more...