Rice balls have always been a lunch staple on campus, and they’re just as versatile as they are iconic. Whether it’s a cheap sit down meal, a snack between lectures, or a surprise dinner after leaving one in your bag all day, rice balls can do it all. Or can they? In a never-before-seen feat of Physical Feducation, we combined two reporters’ skillsets to put flavour and function to the test in a game of rice ball sports. Critic Te Ārohi introduces our dynamic duo for the double review: Mi Goreng Graduate Ruby Hudson handling the rice, and Sub Designer/Video Editor Connor Moffat handling the balls. (sorry). Play ball!
Sushi Station: Spicy Fried Chicken ($7.00)
We kicked off our tasting (and tournament) with a spicy fried chicken rice ball from Sushi Station. There was no label on the ball itself but as an educated sushi ball tasting panel, we could make a fairly good guess. First impressions were promising: the rice was warm and fresh and the ball itself was a more than generous size. The plastic-wrapping wasn’t the most sturdy, a factor that comes into play when considering a ball’s convenience and durability. The exterior was loosely wrapped and with very crumbly rice (possibly due to it being so warm), a combo which led to a very wobbly and hard-to-eat rice ball that wouldn’t withstand the pre-lecture jostle. Upon tasting, however, the spicy sauce within was fantastic, significantly elevating our judgement. It actually had a bit of a kick compared to other spicy rice balls. The chicken was also pretty darn good, it was – trigger warning – *moist* and flavourful which made for a great eating experience. The ratios of rice to filling were also excellent, each bite consisting of rice, chicken and sauce and the rice actually tasted like proper rice (the word “rice” is also starting to lose meaning to me and we’re only one ball in). To conclude, this rice (fuck) ball was pretty decent, the chicken and spice was nice but we were yearning for a more solid composition.
Tasting Scores: Connor – 7 | Ruby – 6.5
BALL: Cricket
RIP this rice ball, bro. Do not play cricket with this shit. It got obliterated like a freshly rolled snowball hitting the back of your mates head at mach 10. Like a lolly scramble but with rice, or an albino swarm of bees. To be fair though, we definitely picked this rice ball because we knew it would explode, and I wanted to hit it with a bat. Sue me.
Campus Shop: Crispy Chicken and Avo ($6.00)
We then followed up with the hidden gem which is the Campus Shop rice ball. Yes, they sell more than pies. It was news to us, too. We weren’t sure what to expect leading into this one. Before even taking our first bite, we were taken aback by how solid this rice ball was. Swear this rice ball could survive days at sea and still be well intact when it returns. To help even more with the security of this rice ball it had a sticker on the Glad Wrap, which also helpfully provided an ingredients list – a nice touch for anyone that may have dietary requirements (or is socially awkward and doesn't want to ask what's in it). Upon first bite, we were impressed with how nicely crispy the chicken was. The avocado and bits of cucumber were a really pleasant little addition to the flavours as well. The rice was tasty and really held its shape while eating, meaning this rice ball is near perfect for a feed on the fly. There were a couple downsides with the Campus Shop rice ball, though. For one, it had been sitting in a fridge and had a use by date sticker on it, which didn't exactly scream “fresh”. Secondly, the rice was a bit dry, reminding us a tad of the dried out rice at the bottom of a rice cooker, and could have used more sauce. Overall, though, it was definitely an underrated contender in the Uni rice ball realm, with solid flavour and convenience. We will be purchasing again.
Tasting Scores: Connor – 8 | Ruby – 7
BALL: Bowling
The Campus Shop rice ball was selected for bowling due to its solid build and its near perfect roundness (I know they are all round, shut up. Whatever) plus there were hopes the avo within could provide a decent structural bond. Overall, the Campus Shop rice ball really surprised me with just how compact its wrapping and build was. It held its shape really well during its multiple attempted bowls trying to knock over all the pins, i.e. leftover Critic birthday party hats, which I’ve decided are the reason it took multiple attempts. We even used it as our testing rice ball for the other sports equipment and it still proceeded to hold strong. Consider us impressed.
Miga Hako Express: Honey Butter Cauliflower ($4.50)
Next was the mighty Miga Hako Express, a new fan favourite with their low prices (lowkey a cult). After being a hit on George St, Miga Hako Express opened quite recently in the Link and ever since it has struck fear into other businesses around campus. Word on the street is that the Dumpling Lady dropped the prices of the steamed buns by $1 and Campus Shop now offers free soy sauce with their rice balls – same as Miga Hako, which they never used to do. Connor was already quite the fan of the new Miga Hako, having consumed many of their chilli mayo rice balls over the last couple weeks (it’s honestly getting out of hand) so the excitement for this one was high. But my goodness were we let down. Connor almost shed a tear writing this review. We purchased the honey butter cauliflower flavour. Props to Miga Hako, they provided a unique flavour of rice ball and they were the only rice ball dealer out of the four that had a vege option available, but it was the early morn’ when we collected these. Taking our first bite, we were instantly disappointed by the scarcity of cauliflower filling in the middle, which was quite annoying because the filling tasted incredible once we eventually mined our way towards it. The cauliflower was virtual perfection, sporting a near-perfect amount of crunch and honey butter coating. The rice was okay, but we were hoping for better considering how many rice-only bites we were getting. It was unseasoned, and just tasted like regular old rice. Further inspection made us a little bit suspicious, as we realised the rice looked to be a longer grain than the usual sushi rice used at other places. Overall, not as good as we were hoping for. Time to hit it.
Tasting Scores: Connor – 6 | Ruby – 6
BALL: Tennis
Miga Hako was pegged for tennis because of its slightly smaller build (potentially due to the lower price point), plus we figured it could have a bit of bounce to it, what with the springiness of the cauliflower and all. The Miga Hako rice ball actually went alright in the tennis scheme, lasting a few decent swings before the wrapping began to give way. But in reality if this was to be used in an actual tennis match with professional players, the rice ball would get obliterated into smithereens on the first serve. Professional players would probably also want an actual tennis ball.
Sushi Great King Street: Brown Rice Spicy Teriyaki Chicken ($6.90)
Before we dove into this one, we had already heard great things from our very own Critic Editor, who recommended the salmon. We got the chicken (oop). Our first experience with the Great King Street Sushi was not great, as the display for the rice balls is just a basket by the till full of every flavour they have, so you have no clue what you are grabbing. This can lead to some not great experiences if there is a large line and you're having to wait till the front, only to still have to ask what flavours there are. But once we had acquired our rice balls the experience only went up from there. We went with a brown rice spicy teriyaki chicken, a real mouthful that one, and by golly it was. It was more of a bowl than a ball, with all the filling in the middle. We indulged in our rice ball and were immediately gobsmacked. Holy fuck. Just incredible. The chilli mayo combined with the teriyaki chicken was an explosion of flavour. The brown rice was great as well, providing more of an earthier flavour than normal rice. It screamed “nutritious”. It also had one of the greatest rice to filling ratios, with it definitely not lacking on filling – a crucial element, we were learning. The teriyaki was sweet but also savoury, well avoiding the ‘cat food’ texture you can sometimes get with teriyaki chicken. Our advice with this one is not to be scared of something different. It was our first experience with brown rice and this flavour combo and we were well impressed; a very unique way to expand your palette. Despite its unique appearance and the borderline stressful ordering experience, this rice ball was outstanding.
Tasting Scores: Connor – 9 | Ruby – 9
BALL: Ping Pong
If you want a sad game of ping pong, this rice ball is for you. While you can hit the rice ball at a decent distance (fun) it does proceed to pathetically flop onto the table with a thwump, and does not provide a bounce for the other player to return back (unfun). Sushi Great King Street held its shape pretty well though, for a rice ball being nailed with a ping pong paddle. It was a truly tragic way to honour a food that had brought us so much joy, but duty calls, and sometimes your duty is to brutalise some rice via ping pong.