Ethel & Hyde | Issue 13

Posted 1:43pm Sunday 28th May 2017 by Student Support

Dear Ethel and Hyde I can see my breath in my room and all my clothes and bedding feel damp. I am ‘not allowed’ to use a heater because we all agreed to that at the start of the year. I’ve changed my mind, but don’t want to cause a fight. Please Read more...

Wild Buck is The Most Scullable Beer in The Country

Posted 1:40pm Sunday 28th May 2017 by Swilliam Shakesbeer

Wild Buck is beer from the good old days, when men were men, a spade was a spade, and it was possible to buy property in Auckland. There’s a genuine argument to be made that Wild Buck was specifically designed to be the most scullable beer in the country.  Understanding the brewing Read more...

Vapourium Presents Science Tank | Issue 13

Posted 1:51pm Sunday 28th May 2017 by Wee Doubt

By looking at a person’s hair you can make assumptions about their age, ethnicity, gender, occupation, political views, their taste in music, income, lifestyle, religion, health, and sexuality. All from something that makes you want to puke if you find it in your meal.  Hair matters. Read more...

Poetry Corner | Issue 13

Posted 1:54pm Sunday 28th May 2017 by Charlie O’Mannin

His wispy fingers fiddle with his penis flicking, scraping, brushing, bursting into imaginary mates with a phantom orgasm.  He clambers around his simple platform and ropes. His enclosure is the kindergarten of children looking in. Their breath pearls the glass.  I question the Read more...

Mystery Object Hunt (May 29 - June 4)

Posted 2:01pm Sunday 28th May 2017 by Critic

This week we welcome a chilly start to International Mud Month – with the rain we are having as I write this, I don’t doubt it will live up to its name.  Monday 29 May This must be my favourite day of the year: Put A Pillow On Your Fridge Day. Not only is it perfectly Read more...

David Clark | Issue 13

Posted 11:43am Sunday 28th May 2017 by David Clark

As a former Treasury analyst and someone with parents who have run their own businesses, I am sometimes asked how it came to pass that I stand with Labour. The answer is simple, but it requires a little unpacking. I believe in a shared prosperity. Everyone should share the benefits of a growing Read more...

The Hell Hole | Issue 13

Posted 2:06pm Sunday 28th May 2017 by Fanny Clive-Trevor

Nicole had recovered from her attack. The deodorant, once rinsed from her eyes and throat, didn’t seem to have done permanent damage. Her vision had been blurry for a couple of days, and her breathing tight, but now she was ok. Ok, except that she could not get the smell out of her room Read more...

Vitalogy | Issue 13

Posted 2:12pm Sunday 28th May 2017 by Prof's Wood & Ruddock

This is a disease resulting from the bite of a rabid dog, or from its licking an abraded portion of the skin, the chief characteristics of which are severe constriction about the throat; spasmodic action of the diaphragm; a peculiar difficulty of swallowing and consequent dread of fluids; anxiety Read more...

Mystery Object Hunt (May 22-28)

Posted 2:06pm Sunday 21st May 2017 by Critic

Day of the Day It’s a special week of special days. Here’s what’s worth celebrating this week: Monday 22 May – Sherlock Holmes Day, Accounting Day and Goth Day. Never have three such concepts come together. Get out the eyeliner, the Netflix, and your tax returns Read more...

ODT Watch | Issue 12

Posted 11:46am Sunday 21st May 2017 by Charlie O’Mannin

To start this week, a waste of six words.   The many-limbed amorphous blob that is the ODT got wet on its shuffle to work this morning.   Tired of the inconveniences of Earth, a sentient tentacle slopped on a keyboard. The ODT just wants to go Read more...