While most were wallowing in their own filth and bewailing their hangovers, twelve innocent little freshers were being put through their paces in a series of challenges known as the “OUSA Fresher Comp”.
The event ran from Sunday through to Friday with the selected group facing multiple challenges each day. The winner, or sole remaining fresher at the end, would walk away with a fully paid-for Queenstown adventure weekend, a $300 Domino’s Pizza party, grooming vouchers from Why Not? and an iPod Touch.
The prize pack, and the inevitable glory, was incentive enough for this gaggle of first years to face torture from the Les Mills tent every day, alongside each of the scheduled sponsored challenges. Sunday and Monday eased into the challenges gently with some ‘bonding games’ which lulled the competitors into a false sense of security before the eliminations started.
Monday afternoon played host to the Fly Buys Gauntlet Challenge, which involved trolleys with oversized wheels being raced around an obstacle course outside the museum.
Tuesday played host to the AJ Hackett Horizontal Bungy Challenge where the competitors had to battle a bungy in order to grab a drink and chop it, an essential scarfie skill. It was tears before beers for the slowest two, who were sent back to their halls in disgrace.
Wednesday saw a slightly disturbing event, the aptly named “Road Kill Comp”, courtesy of the Otago Farmers’ Market. In this event the freshers were transformed into hardened southerners. This time, they had to skin a rabbit and make a meal out of it, another essential skill that will prepare the wee ones for when their flatmate blows the food money at Lucky 7s.
Thursday had two events in store for the remaining competitors. First was the Clocktower Race, followed by karaoke where the freshers had to wow the judges with their croaky mid-o-week voices and ridiculous costumes. Apparently no substantial record label signings were made.
Friday was the final day of torture for the elite few freshers who had made it this far. In the morning they were taken to the top of the Chemistry building and told to abseil down for the penultimate challenge. If relying on the structure and stability of perhaps the crumbliest looking building on campus wasn’t enough to test the first years, they also had to blow up a balloon until it popped midway through the descent.
After this, only the two fastest competitors remained to duel it out in the final event: the Velvet Burger eating contest. The two finalists had one bottle of iced tea to wash down three burgers as fast as possible. In an incredible display, Cumberland’s very own Nic Christie (18) took out the competition and the prize pack. What a fucking legend.
Let them eat roadkill.
