Powering over the steep hill of the Southern Motorway, your eyes are blessed by scenery so beautiful it may force you to pull over. As the sun beams on the broad expanses of the Taieri Plains, a magical town sits in your eyeline. With just under 15,000 residents, the quaint town is not too busy like its neighbour, but has all the hustle-and-bustle one could need. Local legend even says the weather might be slightly sunnier over the hills, too. It’s not a mythical place you may dream about in your lectures – it’s Mosgiel. And I fucking LOVE Mosgiel.
As you sit back in cold, shitty Dunedin, here’s some inspiration on how you can spend the perfect day in Te Konika o te Matamata/Mosgiel and not just ignorantly pass it by when dropping your friend off at the airport.
Dunedin does not sport a Disneyland or Rainbow’s End. Mosgiel, however, is essentially in the same league of attractions with Wal’s Plant Barn. Set on the outskirts of town, down an unassuming concrete driveway, is a garden store with something more. Aside from lots of plants and flowers, life-changing experiences such as minigolf, a driving range, a maze, and miniature train are on offer.
Many dusty Sundays have been spent battling it out on the tee – if your stomach can handle the drive over the hill, that is. With technical turns and terrain, friendships are tested as your competitive spirit airs out tensions among the group. Just be prepared for death stares from whānau on their wholesome days out (especially if sneaking to the manicured bushes for a tak-yak). If you manage to clutch a win, make sure you buy a pot plant on the way out as a reward for your (100% skill-based) victory that will most likely blend in with the other foliage in your flat (mould).
The Botans may have an expertly-curated garden spanning the finest botanic plants across multiple countries, but Mosgiel has the Memorial Garden. It’s a flat field with a pretty mean playground. Various swings and spinny things bring a level of adrenaline unparalleled by any of the lame Ōtepoti playgrounds. It also comes with a skate park and one of those tall spiderweb thingies you can climb on. You know. It’s like a tower thing. With wires. You get it.
There’s plenty of other chances to reconnect with nature too. Not needing a harbour to impress everyone, the silverstream walkway and Peter Johnstone Park have the views that rival St Clair on a sunny day (and without the crowds). You can pretend that the birds and wildlife you see are straight out of a David Attenborough documentary, despite being a 20 minute drive from nature-devoid North D. If you’re after more views, you can take the scenic route home over the Three Mile Hill road as well (not recommended for shit drivers).
For the thrill seekers among us, the closure of Moana Pool’s hydroslides for the second half of the year have been a blow. Fortunately, Mosgiel sports its own pool, Te Puna o Whakaehu, which is much more modern than its Dunedin sibling. There aren’t any hydroslides, which undeniably blows, but plenty of thrills can be had in the spa pool. Chances are, it’ll be a lot quieter than Moana Pool as well, making this the perfect stop to swim off your excitement about Mosgiel.
For the fashion-conscious among us, it’s a tough market of indie baddies on George Street with the likes of Static Age, Paper Bag Princess, and Recycle Boutique. Mosgiel, on the other hand, only has the occasional nana to fight over the last pair of jorts on the rack. The Hospice Shop and Sallies are dark horses for your next shopping sprees – just don’t tell the locals you’ve found out. Often the deals are better than their city counterparts, making up for the petrol money you spent hooning your shitbox car over the hill.
It must be acknowledged that Te Konika o te Matamata seems to have this reputation of a sleepy town. Not sure where that’s come from, but the town knows how to turn out for a good time. A staple of the social calendar is the Wingatui Races, which reportedly have an atmosphere that rivals the Melbourne Cup. Prepare for show-stopping outfits, a good day on the piss, and pretending you know how horse-racing works.
As you’re having the time of your life, thoughts about the boring admin aspects of your life may plague your mind. Never fear; Mosgiel has every shop you could possibly need – plus they’re way better. For groceries, you’ve got a state-of-the-art Woolies (rat free, too) and a New World so comforting you’ll want to have a panic attack when you think about any trips to Centre City in the after-work rush. The town was rocked by the closure of its Warehouse a few years back, but there’s a really solid Mitre 10 and brand-new Pizza Hut to source anything you can dream of.
A hard day of travelling means a well-earned meal to round off the perfect day in Mosgiel. The locals make a much friendlier crowd than some of the sleezy-types found hanging around the Octy on a night out. Head to the Mosgiel Tavern (across from the JW temple) with cheap pints and hearty meals; it is all a broke uni student could dream of, with deals so good you may never want to get on the motorway to head home. The oldies know how to be on aux too, with beats that’ll make Carousel seem like a retirement village in comparison. So get a jug, talk about how much you love your mates – but talk even more about how much you just froth Mosgiel. Try not to get cut off though, you’ll lose access to the best watering hole in the South.
It’s clear Mosgiel, just South of Ōtepoti, is unequivocally the centre of southern hospitality in this country. Prepare for your eyes to well up as you brave the drive home, queue your saddest songs, and pencil in your next visit. Never forget, Mosgiel is near. And it’s fucking awesome.