BLTs are the Conrad Smith of feeds. Not underrated, because everyone froths them, but also not everyone’s first thought when it comes to the all-time greats. They’re fucking good though, the whole package really. Whether we’re talking flat dinners, hungover feeds or a 3 am snack when you’re balls deep into a Netflix binge, BLTs are always a great option. They’re nothing flashy, not at all difficult and they always go down a treat. While the recipe is literally in the name, we’ve heard reports of Tourism students still managing to fuck it up, so here’s a quick guide to help you get the basics down.
Step one: Cook some bacon. If you’ve got a bit of cash sitting in the bank, streaky bacon gets my vote. Hot tip: try cooking it in the oven to get that extra crispy goodness.
But if you’re battling away on the allowance Jacinda gave you, a packet of bacon scraps for $7 a kilo go hard, as they’re nice and fatty, which helps get that juicy salty goodness that you don’t get with leaner cuts of bacon. Plus, you can fry them up with some diced onion and the onion cooks in the bacon fat, which is amazing. Personally, I’m a big fan of my bacon crispy but if you’re into it soggy that’s entirely your choice (who the fuck doesn’t like their bacon crispy?).
Step 2: Prep your L and your T. Pretty self-explanatory, slice your fresh tomatoes, tear up your lettuce and you’re good to go.
Step 3: Bread. Couplands $1 bread (obviously). I like my bread like Iggy Azalea – white and super thick. I run it untoasted with some aioli on one piece of bread and a bit of BBQ sauce on the other. And if you’ve got a weird jar of relish that your grandma made you sitting around the back of the cupboard, here’s a chance to pop it open.
Step 4: Assembly. Don’t feel like you have to place them in the order of B, L, T. If you feel inclined you can go TLB or LBT, or for those feeling particularly adventurous BTL.
Like Conrad Smith, the BLT is very versatile and can be adapted to anyone's preferences. For example, I like to put some sliced red onion in my BLTs. They’re mean if you feel like adding things like a fried egg, some cheese, or avocado, if you’re rich. Other options are to swap the sauces out; some that I rate in place of BBQ are Dijon or wholegrain mustard, cranberry sauce or even a bit of honey. Treat the flatties: make them a BLT.
Taste rating: Better than an Export Gold after a hard day’s work. Not as good as a Speight’s.
Difficulty rating: Less difficult than a Tourism Degree, but only just.
Cost: Totally worth it.