For:
We naturally put other people in boxes immediately upon meeting them based on preconceptions and perceived signals, real or imagined. We are brought up to understand that subtle indicators are reflective of deeper identities. The subliminal messages that we send with our choices in clothing, our appearance, our habits and behaviour, are all meant to be perceived, on a conscious or unconscious level, and communicate aspects of our identity.
Whether it's the way we dress, walk, talk, or our mannerisms, there is undeniably something to Gaydar™. Studies have found that these responses are more accurate from those part of the LGBTQ+ community. They are also more accurate when they are made quickly – suggesting they are automatic responses, and that we don’t actually know what determines these judgements.
We often rely on our intuition, which is based on past experiences, emotions, and observations we usually aren’t even aware we’re making. While an imperfect, and actually an inherently homophobic tool, Gaydar™ is real, and has real basis in widely accepted cues conveying sexuality.
Having said all this, Gaydar™ is not necessarily this clinical concept, it’s a magical innate sense (with a curious correlation to guys I find attractive). Sure, there is minimal scientific evidence for Gaydar™, but human perceptions and relations have always been a complex thing to study. I know in my heart that Gaydar™ is real, despite wishing it wasn’t – just like toucans. Or Florida.
Against:
Gaydars are not real. You are not special, read the room. You’re not observant.
Not all gay people dress or act like a stereotypical gay person would. For example, you have people like Rock Hudson, or a bunch of Republican senators. There are so many people who are public figures AND gay who don’t set off people’s gaydars because it simply doesn’t exist.
An example of this is one of my mates, who will remain nameless. He has so many stories of getting hot and heavy in many a named flat with blokes on Castle and Leith Street, and how he would often see them out with their girlfriends and they would exchange a knowing look, but the girlfriend, who probably “has a gay bestie and has SUCH a good gaydar” is completely fucking oblivious to the fact her boyfriend is getting dug the fuck out on the low by one of the most obviously gay people I’ve ever met.
This whole “homiesexual” thing makes it so difficult to gather whether someone is gay or not, because so many people are just like “oh my god breathas are so gay” and many joke about “bro-jobs” and antics that seem like they’d be from an all male boarding school probably aren't a joke. Everyone is human, people are gay and it isn't a big deal.
Despite this, some queer people are incredibly obvious, very flamboyant and animated in a way that makes you think “yep, gay as hell” but some operate in a more disguised way for various reasons, be it safety or to uphold a certain reputation. Considering this, people saying “oh I’ve got a good gaydar” makes them come across as a bloodhound for gay people, which is an insane thing to say. Be considerate, be kind, and don’t air laundry that isn’t yours to air.