Moaningful Confessions: Gatekeep, Gaslight, Gossip Girl

Posted 4:12pm Sunday 26th March 2023 by Critic

Every time I close my eyes, I’m reminded of the most disappointing night of my life. Three years ago, I was a bottle of wine and a butter chicken deep and decided that it would be the night I finally got some. I was on a mission, so I downloaded Tinder and managed to snag one with a missing Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Cherry cherry boom boom

Posted 3:01pm Sunday 19th March 2023 by Critic

I remember it as if it was yesterday.   New Year’s Eve was in the air, and my hunger for an intimate partner for the night was in full swing. I was talking to this girl at the time, and we thought New Year’s would be the primo opportunity to finally do it.   As she Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: Brother-in-law gets fucked hard (by the law)

Posted 1:58pm Sunday 12th March 2023 by Critic

Is this sex related? No. At least not in a good way. But since I can’t afford therapy, winning a free sex toy from Critic for this story is as close as I’ll get.   The story begins back in October when I started receiving TikToks from my mates back home of a girl saying her Read more...

Moaningful Confessions: The threesome that was never meant to be

Posted 2:43pm Sunday 5th March 2023 by Critic

  It started off as any good sexual encounter would: we had all been drinking for three days straight and were feeling somewhere between delirium and death. I had been talking to one co-worker named Jimmy (not his real name) and feeling a bit promiscuous. We had spent the last few days Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Tap and Gap ASAP

Posted 5:38pm Sunday 26th February 2023 by Critic

It was the Saturday of Re-O and, after a week of pouring rain and a lack of alcohol consumed, I knew tonight was the night I needed to send it. So, obviously the only way to do this was to down as many vodka shots as physically possible. I’m not going to lie, I truly did this to the best of my Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Signal Hole

Posted 5:24pm Sunday 2nd October 2022 by Critic

My partner and I were both the first people in our respective flats to get Covid. Because of this, it meant that once we were done with our isolation and our flatmates got Covid, we didn’t have to isolate, so we were able to see each other after their iso had ended. Being able to see them was Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Chemical Warfare

Posted 2:16pm Saturday 24th September 2022 by Critic

Being Dunedin’s premier gay, I started my night by browsing my way through Tinder's flawless feed. Dodging the constant barrage of poor attempts at sexual ice breakers, I came face to face with the most handsome breather one could ever set their eyes on. His beautiful, sharp, chiselled jaw Read more...

Moaningful_Confessions.txt | Robot rendezvous

Posted 5:29pm Friday 19th August 2022 by Critic

I had the most amazing rendezvous last night. I was out at the bar with a few friends when I spotted him across the room. He was tall, dark, and handsome, and I couldn't help but stare. I could tell he was interested too, because he kept making eye contact with me. After a couple of drinks, I Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | TRUE STORY! Nice Guy Gentleman Gets Laid! *NOT CRINGE AT ALL!*

Posted 3:18pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Critic

Once upon a summer's day, a beautiful princess was finishing her last exam. Her (not really) prince charming was waiting outside the exam room with a cup of tea, a packed lunch and his noble steed (Toyota people-mover with amazing fuel economy). It had been a couple of lonely days with the exam Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Mommy Milk

Posted 8:07pm Friday 5th August 2022 by Critic

So, pretty soon after I had broken up with my boyfriend, I decided to have a little hoe phase and met up with this guy. He was quite strange but he picked me up and we ended up going to a hotel (I have never felt more like a hooker in my life). For some reason he put on the Minion Movie and we Read more...