Moaningful Confessions | A Sinking Feeling

Posted 3:40pm Sunday 10th October 2021 by Critic

Out Of Reach The knock at the door got me jumping off the bed in seconds. I ran down the stairs, excited to see her. My eyes lit up as I saw her. My new vibrator was just as I had imagined, a petite wee thing, exactly like her profile. I escorted her upstairs to my room. Things escalated quickly Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Serving our country

Posted 12:38am Saturday 2nd October 2021 by Critic

With daylight savings creeping up, it’s time for me to reminisce on what I was doing this time last year. My lovely friend (we’ll call her Sophie) and I had decided to head to Christchurch, with hopes of pulling a pair of guys. After trying to shotgun a few too many drinks beforehand, Read more...

TERF Counter-Protest Mostly Wholesome, Despite Assaults

Posted 2:29pm Sunday 26th September 2021 by Asia Martusia King

A “Suffrage Day celebration”, hosted by self-proclaimed gender-critical feminists in the Octagon last Sunday was counterprotested by a transgender-positive Jump Jam pizza party. The counterprotest was described as “wholesome” by attendees, and no arrests were made. Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | The Girl Next Door

Posted 4:00pm Sunday 26th September 2021 by Critic

Me and Jade had been neighbours for as long as I can remember. Growing up in the hinterlands of the south, we had gone to school in Gore together. Even as we got into the saddle of puberty, I had never really seen her as a potential romantic filly — I was in a stable relationship, and besides, Read more...

The Kiwi Who Admins an International Bestiality Group

Posted 3:10pm Sunday 26th September 2021 by Asia Martusia King

Content warning: Graphic descriptions of bestiality. Jessica* is my new friend. She loves cooking, podcasts, gaming, and dogs. Here’s the caveat: She really loves dogs. She admins an online international bestiality server of 11,000 people, united by their desire to fuck Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | That Time I Straight Up Had Sex In A Zoo

Posted 4:22pm Sunday 12th September 2021 by Critic

Okay straight up I had sex in a zoo, multiple times. I’m here to confess my sins of my wrongdoings to all of the animals that bore witness to these sexy times. Anyway, my boyfriend at the time came to visit me in my home city and we went to the zoo, as you do when you're showing someone Read more...

Do You Believe in Love After Lockdown?

Posted 3:12pm Sunday 5th September 2021 by Asia Martusia King

The pandemic has had its moments. Other than the hallowed launch of Pokémon Go in 2016, I’ve never experienced such a sense of community before — which is odd considering we aren’t allowed to physically hang out. A lot of us formed socially distanced friendships with Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Part 2: A Big Night

Posted 3:59pm Sunday 5th September 2021 by Critic

This experience came right on the back of a great one nighter, a wonderful night with such a hulk of man. Totally destroyed my ass and I loved it. We arranged to meet at his (we'll call him Dave), and planned out a little study meeting with some fun and maybe even a friend after. The sheer Read more...

Moaningful Confessions | Juicy Stuff in a Juicy Van

Posted 4:30pm Sunday 22nd August 2021 by Critic

This story begins with a weekend trip to Queenstown with the girls. Drinking? Yes. Lines in town which are shorter than two hours? Yes. Hitting the slopes while we’re at it? Big yes. Half a bottle of fireball and a full face of makeup later, we find our way to town. By this point, Read more...

Flat Dildo Stolen

Posted 1:22pm Monday 16th August 2021 by Runze Liu

A group of flatmates have given up hope their dildo will be found safe and well. They remember it fondly. The dildo, described by William as “about eight inches long, fluorescent, a translucent pink colour with veins going down the side, with no balls, a classically sized girth, realistic Read more...

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