Love Online | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Lovebirds

Critic created a female internet dating profile expecting a low standard of suavity. But not even we could be prepared for the barrage of sheer ineptitude that followed, each new suitor representing a new nadir in the evolution of mankind. This column is a word-for-word transcript of an Read more...

Editorial | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Callum Fredric

I’m always up for a solid money-making rort. My car is adorned with dozens of parking receipts, designed to deter parking wardens from checking whether I have actually paid for parking on a given day. If I do pay for parking, I only buy 10 cents’ worth, limiting my liability to a $10 “expired Read more...

The Leek | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Campbell Ecklein

Amid tight government funding, falling enrolments and increased operational costs, the University of Otago has had to accept a rather tight budget for 2013 in order to continue to provide students with the high-quality services we’ve grown so accustomed to. At a University Council meeting, Read more...

Kant Stop Husserling | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Erma Dag

Some people want a ritzy inner-city apartment, in which they can recline on a bespoke eight-seater couch upholstered in the finest polar bear pelt, snort mountains of cocaine, and sit on their balcony dining on poached Galapagos tortoise and stroking their pet snow leopard while observing the plebs Read more...

Get Out Of The Ghetto | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Phoebe Harrop

If your only means of getting out of the ghetto any time soon is the old waewae express, look no further than Dunedin’s local Mount Lee (that’s where the famous Beverley Hills Hollywood sign calls home). Signal Hill is a prominent finger of hilly goodness that rises sharply up from the Harbour, just Read more...

ODT Watch | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Jess Cole

The ODT sought to get right amongst the spirit of the holidays, reporting on key Easter issues such as the number of New Zealanders who claimed rabbit, egg, and hot cross bun-related injuries last year. Apparently (incorrectly) assuming their average reader has an intelligence level Read more...

Science, Bitches! | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Hannah Twigg

By now, many of you have probably fallen victim to the infamous Fresher Flu. With winter soon approaching, the last thing anyone wants to deal with is the (real) flu as well as the cold. The best thing you can do to help get you through, flu-free, is to grab yourself a flu shot. And before you stop Read more...

For Fuck's Sake | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Elsie Stone

This week I’m going to try to help some of you poor ignorant wretches out there who are embarrassing themselves on Facebook. We are young students, frequently engaging in shenanigans and debauchery, often vomiting in public places and having awkward sexual experiences – our lives are pretty Read more...

Hi Dr. Nick | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Dr. Nick

Hi everybody! Weclome back! While home for the holidays, many readers would have gotten the “how’s uni?” and this week’s column is all about that question. Rather than the usual grunted “fine,” I want to get deep about it; deeper than a deep sea diver with a massive knob gets inside his Read more...

The More Things Change | Issue 06

Posted 4:40pm Sunday 7th April 2013 by Jessica Bromell

This week, a masterpiece is uncovered, and science prevails. April 8, 1820: On a small Aegean island that nobody had previously heard of, a peasant discovered a statue that would subsequently become one of the most famous pieces of ancient Greek art ever. It is now called the Venus de Milo, Read more...