Local Man Warns of Rampant Scam

Local Man Warns of Rampant Scam

Dave, local pisshead and student, contacted the news to report a scam. “Hey bro, I just realized the other day that I’m actually being scammed, and I need to tell other people about it”, he warned. It was very serious.

“So, turns out, I’m being scammed by my landlord”, explained Dave. “I’m giving him, like, 180 bucks a week to rent his house, but it turns out, he doesn’t even OWN the house, and he’s using my $180 to pay for the loan for the house that I’M living in, bro. Fucked, aye?” Dave complained that at the end of the day, he’s been scammed into paying off the loan of another man’s home, and he “feels pretty gutted about it, actually”.

“I just want to get the message out there, because I reckon I’m not the only one getting scammed”, said Dave. “I just think it’s bullshit that I can be lied to like this. Like, after this year, I’ll have paid this bloke nearly ten grand, which he’s using to pay off the loan on the house I’m living in, and then when it’s paid off, HE gets to keep the house, and I get absolutely nothing. It’s so cooked, bro.”

We tried to provide Dave with some further reading on the matter, including Rat King Landlord, and Das Kapital, but Dave told us he “doesn’t know how to read”, because “he studies PPE”. Fair enough, Dave.

This article first appeared in Issue 26, 2022.
Posted 6:28pm Sunday 9th October 2022 by The Critical Tribune.