Columns

Girl and Boy Review Dunedin’s Best Sights

Girl
Al Bar: Last week, my friend and I saw two insanely good-looking English boys drinking at the Al Bar – one of them even talked to me. Unfortunately, my klutzy male friends scared him off and I was too shy / moronic to follow up. Recently, another friend was braver and re-counts “So, the other night, I took home the most beautiful man I have ever seen.” He was a tourist, so if you’re hoping to break into the ‘not someone I already know’ market, Al Bar is a good place to start. 
The Dunedin Public Library: I was browsing around the atlases on the first floor when I realised – over half of the people around me were somewhat good-looking boys in my age bracket. Wow. And they can read. However, the question remains: how to start up a conversation without coming off as a creep? I haven’t worked it out (or tried), but it would make a good experiment.
Cafes (everywhere): This is a major cliché, but baristas are really hot. The only problem is that they know it, and they wield their ‘power’ like Kim Jung Il. So, you can make coffee, big deal, so can I – so can everyone I know. But, damn you look cute in that black apron. Sigh. The end.
 
Boy:
Counselling Session Waiting Rooms: Pretty people want to talk to strangers. I started turning up early after a cute girl smiled at me before an appointment. Weeks passed and I only saw her once again, crying into her Kleenex. Waiting for an awkward conversation improved my mood, though, and eventually my counsellor told me to go away.
The University Librarians: The Uni librarians possess the power to access any book or journal article throughout the known inter-loan world. That’s the kind of unattainable power I want by my side. Still, how does one pick up more than a book? My cute librarian friend thinks potential suitors should leave phone numbers on call slips.
Vivace: Sing A Ha’s ‘Take On Me’ to a girl you’ve only just laid eyes on, finish the song with a pash on the dance floor, and go back to hers. It’s the kind of drunk I find utterly romantic, and that I’ve both heard and seen work.
The Girls of Hinton’s: The fact that Geoff doesn’t hire guys to sell fruit is a bonus. My friend fell in love with a girl from Hinton’s s by asking her out. That probably works well in most situations.