A return to Alert Level 2 is being welcomed by Dunedin’s exploited hospitality workers, who say they are looking forward to being overworked, underpaid and under-appreciated yet again.
Local bartender Timothy told the Critical Tribune: “It was real weird sitting at home. Like, I slept the same amount but was feeling less tired for some reason. And I read a lot more, rediscovered faith, and found peace in my soul for the first time since primary school.”
“It was terrible. I’m looking forward to getting back into my high-pressure, low-paid job again, when my boss yells at me for refusing someone their sixth Jägerbomb of the night because ‘they’re a regular’.”
Duty manager Raj said: “My relationship with my partner is now stronger than it’s ever been, and my kids do enjoy having their dad around more often. But what I’m really looking forward to now is kicking out drunk patrons and refunding Karens who find a hair in their fries, all for a dollar above minimum wage.”
“I’ll need to remind staff and customers to keep their masks on, too. At least they’ll catch most of the vomit before it hits the floor,” he added. Bar owner Tara said she was really struggling. “Fucking Jacinda’s communist restrictions means I can barely stay afloat,” she said, while counting a stack of wage subsidy cash.