“I just can’t risk it,” he says. “What if an important email comes in while I’m shaggin? My life moves too fast, man, I can’t tap out while I bang it out.” What a tremendous lifestyle. Sources close to the student report that this claim is “entirely untrue” and that they are “in no way close to that guy, ew, no”. When asked if anybody has ever found the watch a turn-off, the student said “hell no, chicks dig the watch. They see how fast my fingers can type on that tiny screen. They know what it means. Besides, I’m not taking it off - do you know how glorious it is to cum to the sound of a notification?”
Student Refuses to Remove Apple Watch During Sex
