“Let’s Go Out Tonight and Stand in the UBar Line!”

“Let’s Go Out Tonight and Stand in the UBar Line!”

“Oh my gosh, do you know what the best idea in the world is? Let’s go get drunk and yell about what a bad time we’re having while we wait for hours in the cold and rain to be let into UBar!” said Hamish Glunder to his assembled friends, who all nodded enthusiastically. “What an excellent idea Hamish,” said Benjamin Klunk (it’s a Swiss name), “we had so much fun last time we went and stood still for a while with a bunch of drunk people!”  

The Tribune has confirmed that upon reaching the front of the line, Glunder, Klunk and co. doubled back and joined the end again, the bastards.

This article first appeared in Issue 3, 2019.
Posted 5:36pm Thursday 7th March 2019 by The Critical Tribune.