Columns

I tried, oh how I tried, to get up on my high horse and write about the marriage amendment bill that will shortly be coming before Parliament, which will of course allow gay and lesbian couples to marry.

But I just couldn’t get passionate about it. Not only is it highly likely that the bill will pass, it’s blindingly obvious to anyone born this side of 1945 that a legally mandated institution like marriage needs to be open to any two people that want to enter into it, regardless of how their bits fit together.

Personally, I’d prefer if the government got out of the marriage business entirely, and just provided a basic civil contract that people could sign, divvying up their property if they decide to split. But that’s just me.

Generally there are two arguments against gay marriage, and neither of them is very good. The first says that you are undermining the family unit, and that it is unfair on any children that would be raised by said couple. Sure, ideally there would be a man and a woman raising a kid. But hetero marriage has a terrible track record of providing committed and loving relationships as the basis for raising kids. Anyone with half a brain would say that a loving gay marriage is a better place for a kid than a divorced and acrimonious hetero one.

The second, slightly stronger argument is that religious establishments, churches for example, shouldn’t be forced to marry people that do not share their religious views. And if a religion forbids homosexuality, then fine, of course they shouldn’t be forced to marry a homosexual couple. However, it is the government who makes the rules about marriage, not churches. Legally gays should be allowed to marry. Churches should make their own internal decisions. No, you won’t have the right to marry in that beautiful church that you love if the parish that the church belongs to doesn’t agree with gay marriage, but it’s their church, tough shit.

Honestly, it surprised me how excited people got when the news came out (see what I did there) that a gay marriage bill would be put before Parliament. I cannot for the life of me understand why any intelligent person would fight for the right to enter into an establishment as fucked up as marriage. I get the desire to have exactly the same rights as everyone else, but still, it is honestly beyond me. But it sure as hell isn’t up to breeders like me to decide what rights queers should have. You tell me what you want, and I’m more than happy to help you get it.

Hey, look at that. Wrote the whole thing about gay marriage after all.