Aquarius
This is for everybody going through tough times. Believe me: been there, done that, but every day above ground is a good day. Remember that.
Indulgence to succumb to: Fighting with your conservative family members.
Pisces
Soon you’ll free from the shackles of haters and people who cramp your style. With the year coming to a close, it’s time to say fuck it! Burn bridges, scream at strangers, and act upon those intrusive thoughts.
Indulgence to succumb to: Asking out your barista crush.
Aries
It’s likely the past week's Aries full moon has gotten your knickers in a twist. Good news is soon the storm will settle, and you’ll get back to only being slightly, rather than fully, unhinged.
Indulgence to succumb to: An expensive UberEats order.
Taurus
Stop taking things personally. Not everything is about you - unless it is about you, in which case you should take things personally.
Indulgence to succumb to: Crafting an entirely new personality.
Gemini
You aren’t delusional, you actually just are better than everybody else. Stay cool, stay confident, stay slay.
Indulgence to succumb to: Your online shopping wish list.
Cancer
You’ve never had an original thought in your life. No offence.
Indulgence to succumb to: Acting upon your homo-erotic fantasies with the bros.
Leo
You’ve been on a dark turn for far too long. It’s time to go for a drive and listen to some Taylor Swift. Shake it off, baby!
Indulgence to succumb to: Becoming a Swiftie.
Virgo
If you’ve been thinking about monetizing a hobby, stop. It’s time to think about what really matters. People over profit, babes.
Indulgence to succumb to: Calling your mum.
Libra
2023 has been nothing but a dumpster fire for you. But it’s your season, and your time to shine. Everyone else should shut the fuck up and bask in your limelight.
Indulgence to succumb to: Having a seance.
Scorpio
Literally NO ONE can relate to you. This statement is up for interpretation!
Indulgence to succumb to: Booking the 5pm koru hour flight so you get cheese and crackers.
Sagitarius
Normalise leaving the country when you experience a minor inconvenience. No need to deal with the trials and tribulations life throws at you.
Indulgence to succumb to: Spending your life savings on something stupid.
Capricorn
Big things are coming your way. But don’t be fooled, it may be a trap! A trap which will humble you and instil kindness in your soul.
Indulgence to succumb to: Starting your own podcast.