Agents of the Crown have recently unearthed plans for MenuDeliverEats employees to institute a coup in the highest levels of the New Zealand government. This has confirmed the suspicions of local residents, who said “They don’t fear anything. I’ve seen one park on double yellow lines right in front of a parking warden.” Armed with bulletproof hotbags and a disdain for other road users, Ardern is worried by the significant threat they pose to national security: “They outnumber our army 4 to 1, and their supply chains are unparalleled, they can have hot food delivered anywhere in the city in just 35-50 minutes (depending on restaurant wait times)... if they decided to rebel, we can’t compete with that.” A MenuDeliverEats spokesperson was unavailable to comment. More to follow.
Posted 1:21pm Sunday 10th April 2022 by The Critical Tribune.
Tags: delivereasy
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