Features

The world of politics is as foreign a land to the puffer-wearing, dubstep-blaring, STD-sharing scarfie as the Close Reserve section in the library. More than one in four under-25s aren't enrolled to vote, and the electoral turnout is undoubtedly lower. The numbers at recent student protests have been abysmal and the hardened few have been reduced to such vain stunts as attempting to chase John Key around Dunedin in a car whilst waving signs out the window. Jimmy Tait-Jamieson and Jack Montgomerie resolved to leave the hedonistic milieu of Castle St and descend into the underworld of student politics where a few hardy souls persist in their quest for freedom, justice and a cushy job in policy analysis.
 
Part-time radicals
Our descent into Hades was steep. Our first meeting was with the most militant group on campus: the infamous International Socialist Organisation (ISO). We arrived at Clubs 'n' Socs to find a disparate bunch standing around a table of dusty, moth-eaten Marxist texts. Over his cup of tea, Derwin Smith - who professes a desire to burn down "arch-parasite" John Key's mansion and "appropriate all his shit" - explained the inevitable collapse of capitalism. ISO's strategy is to wait in the wings for this violent revolution to occur. There's no fixed date yet, but the Arab Spring, financial meltdown and global warming all suggest that the storming of the Beehive might not be far off. We left with a copy of the Socialist Review; a steal at $2.
 
If it wasn't for a certain pungent fog surrounding their members, you could barely tell Otago NORML (National Organisation for Marijuana Legalisation) from the ISO. NORML are another group heavy on banners, homemade signs and anti-corporate rhetoric. Despite the lazy stoner stereotype, the group points out that they've been actively protesting cannabis prohibition for seven years, meeting twice a week to smoke dope on Union lawn.
 
The protest we attended was interrupted by a sudden shower. With boy-scout aplomb, several red-eyed individuals set about trying to put up the sides of the gazebo they'd earlier erected. The whole team pitched in and all appeared to be going swimmingly until some bright spark noted that the canvas was inside out. The episode proved fitting; it seems the group muddles along with lots of enthusiasm but no clear plan. One curly-haired member who'd joined NORML to control his "ever-expanding consciousness" after doing "a lot of 'shrooms" thought only a cultural revolution (in the manner of the ISO) could "free the weed." Others were happy to seek law reform. They voiced support for the Aotearoa Legalise Cannabis Party, and even ACT's libertarian ideas. We suggest it's only a matter of time before we see Don Brash toking up on Union lawn. Despite their inconsistencies, the group displays an admirable sense of generosity. No other group offered us illicit drugs.
 
Party hacks in khaki slacks
Not every group is so radical. On OUSA Market Day, we got to see a more mellow, presentable side of the campus political circus. The sun was out, pamphlets were circulating, petitions were being signed and Michael Woodhouse, the local National candidate, was hovering awkwardly around the Young Nats as we approached. This was clearly the opposite end of the political spectrum, characterised by polo shirts, number-three haircuts and an urgent lack of oestrogen. The only protesting you'll see here is individual submissions to select committees. But it's not all politics. Callum Fredric, the local Chair, explained that social events loom large on the Young Nats calendar. The 75th anniversary ball had just been, featuring John Key, Jenny Shipley and the cheerily-named Party President, Peter Goodfellow. Perhaps due to the generous open bar, details were sketchy though we can confirm there was no quick-step with Key. Despite the lack of dancing, it sounded like a good night, but as a Young Labour member later quipped, "How can a social event be good if it's all guys?".
 
Tagging alongside the stall was local ACT on Campus member, John Brinsley-Pirie. John objected to being called "a little segment of our party" by a blazer-wearing Young Nat but his solitary presence suggests otherwise. While it's been tough since the golden days of ex-president and comic genius Rick Giles, owner of an argument "so powerful it's not necessary to talk about it" (tinyurl.com/yfmbcxa), AoC is still going strong. John was involved in the headline-grabbing distribution of free double-downs ("600 calories of liberty") and Wellington member, Peter "Pants" McCaffrey, regularly denounces Logan Edgar's opposition to VSM in fiery press releases. On the matter of his alleged nickname, John confessed he'd never seen Peter in shorts, even on the really hot days.
 
Across the asphalt lurked long-haired hippie Bert Holmes of Campus Greens. He manned a small stall stacked with second-hand CD-ROMs, old paperbacks and pro-cannabis t-shirts, described as "sick as" by one passing Commerce student. Campus Greens have recently moved into the local electorate branch where they are better able to revolutionise the "democratised state paradigm". This has come at the expense of social activities. We spoke to an ex-member, Mahoney Turnbull, of summer camps at Jeanette's, laughter yoga at the marae ("shit it's good, it gives your abs a real good workout") and trips to the Catlins to "just plant some trees and chill." Now it appears all that Otago Campus Greens do is gather in Room 6 of Clubs 'n' Socs to watch TVNZ 7's Backbenches and yell at the TV.
 
Labour's love lost
But where was Young Labour in all of this? Once described as the most active political group in the country, the Dunedin North branch of Young Labour has dwindled to a handful of active members. Two ex-members refused to be named, but were happy to discuss the tragic downfall. They claimed the group imploded after the local Labour candidate, David Clark, used "party strings and party bullshit" to cripple Simon Wilson's campaign for the safe Dunedin North seat. "He broke our hearts, man," one opined.
 
We eventually made contact with the current president, Karen Heine, who confirmed that "people involved in his campaign basically called us and said Simon didn't have a chance and we should buckle and get behind the popular option which was David." Heine now professes full loyalty to Clark. We asked David whether he could confirm this; "No I can't. I don't know anything about that." He insisted that "it was a fair and just process" but is aware "that one or two people felt disappointed after Simon's non-selection."
 
In-fighting isn't just a Labour issue. Following a botched attempt to convince their ISO comrades of the benefits of principled non-violent action, Dan Benson-Guiu and several of his peace-loving fellow travellers formed the Organisation for Global Non-Violent Action (OGNA). At their screening of Ghandi on World Peace Day, we chatted to Dan while a girl in a batik skirt set out a cake stand of "Catalan sponge-cake; vegan, gluten-free peanut butter biscuits; and semolina nut yum-yums." Dan told us he still gets along with ISO heavyweight James Gluck well enough to co-host a politics radio show; "We're all about compassion." He did, however, manage a chuckle at the ISO's endorsement of the Mana Party. As David Clark told us, "there is definitely politics in a political organisation."
 
Save the planet, buy the t-shirt
The Moving Planet Day at Dunedin North Intermediate, filled with peace, love and toe rings, was the perfect antidote to the cynical world of power politics. Amongst the 'I Pity the Fossil Fool' t-shirts, Students for Environmental Action (SEA) had set up a table where they were instructing future 'guerrilla gardeners' on the perfect ratio of a seed bomb (5 parts dirt, 3 parts clay, 1 part seed). Grass verges beware.
 
Bombs aside, co-president Tarsh Turner says SEA is hardly radical. They enjoy festivals, potluck dinners, and breaking ground in their newly acquired community garden opposite Unipol. Are they just a bunch of hippies? The dreadlocked, anklet-wearing matriarch of SEA insists they aren't, but admits, "I'm probably living the stereotype right now."
 
New kid on the block Generation Zero is harder to place. Spokesperson Louis Chambers, looking dapper in a three-piece suit, explains: "Nobody's quite sure where we fit in and so we've sort of stepped beyond some of those traditional rivalries, which I think is a good thing. I think our message is more constructive, like not just bitching about stuff for its own sake but doing it because we think that we can paint a vision of where we want things to go." Their vision is zero net emissions by 2050 and they've been proactive organising public meetings, including one where Michael Woodhouse renounced his love for lignite. Their ability to tread the tightrope of political neutrality, achieve results and attract members makes Generation Zero a group to watch.
 
Bleak prospects
Had our journey been worthwhile? While there seems to be an opportunity for strong, non-partisan, single-issue groups to make a difference, do the "mainstream" parliamentary youth wings have any influence? We put the question to politics lecturer Professor Chris Rudd. "Zilch," he reckoned.
They can, however, be useful sounding boards for future policies, and fertile breeding grounds for power-hungry Pols students eager to avoid a life working for IRD, WINZ or McDs. Youth wings provide valuable apprenticeships into the world of committee meetings, policy discussions and brutal backstabbing. Helen Clark, Phil Goff and Simon Bridges all started their political career in the youth wings and odds are we met a future MP (or Commissar, in Derwin's case) in our interviews. One Young Labour member was less optimistic. She bemoaned that "those with ambition have no talent, and those with talent have no ambition," her Young Nat friend adding, "and those with both are in business."
 
Student politics may be a different world, but it's hard to imagine campus life being as colourful and diverse without the poorly designed monochrome posters, the smell of weed on a Friday afternoon, and the earnest correspondence in this esteemed publication. To reference Roger Waters: shine on, you crazy diamonds.