Booze Review | Scapegrace Pomegranate & Doris Plum is a Pretentious Money-Grab

Posted 3:09pm Monday 15th August 2022 by Chug Norris

There is only one way a person could come to buy Scapegrace’s Pomegranate and Doris Plum RTDs: fresh from an exhausting day of abusing retail workers and making disapproving noises about the homeless, your average Scapegrace consumer is in much need of refreshment. Getting home and realising Read more...

Booze Review | Major Major Blended Kentucky Bourbon

Posted 4:49pm Sunday 31st July 2022 by Chug Norris

Let’s be honest, it really doesn’t take a lot of effort to make people buy alcohol in NZ. Major Major’s Blended Kentucky Bourbon drink is not a particularly innovative move by Asahi. They’ve just bought a bottle of bourbon and watered it down with some lemon soda. But Read more...

Blame Putin for RTD Shortage

Posted 5:56pm Monday 25th July 2022 by Ruby Werry

If you’ve noticed getting your hands on Diesels or Billy Mavs has been harder recently, you’re not alone, and you’re not wrong. International shortages of bourbon have been causing prices to spike. While the spirit is adored by middle-aged men and those who are middle-aged men at Read more...

Hangover Cures

Posted 2:16am Saturday 9th July 2022 by Critic

Over the break, some of our reporters decided to try a variety of purported hangover cures. Raw eggs, long runs, and black coffee: it’s all in here. What worked and what didn’t? We put our livers on the line to get to the truth. Black Coffee, Nicotine and a Cold Shower A Read more...

Hold the Cone:

Posted 6:47pm Sunday 29th May 2022 by Sean Gourley

The life cycle of a road cone in New Zealand is similar to our own life cycles. We are born in a place no one has heard of, we spend vast amounts of time sitting in the middle of nowhere doing next to nothing, and from time to time we get filled with alcohol and get absolutely smashed at parties. Read more...

Booze Review | Estrella Damm

Posted 7:05pm Sunday 29th May 2022 by Chug Norris

Estrella is a beer like no other – except every other beer in Europe. It is Spanish, it is mild like the Mediterranean climate, and for some reason every bottle is shaped like a wine bottle – probably to deceive the Spanish to believe they are still drinking a grape-based beverage. Read more...

Local Produce | H2yo

Posted 1:56pm Sunday 22nd May 2022 by Molly Willis

With plans to hydrate the world one liquor store at a time, Dunedin locals Anthony Tep, Silas Kemp, Tom Gallagher and Riley Coughlin kicked off the launch of their RTD brand H2yo on Friday the 13th of May at Leith Liquor.   H2yo BLUE is a 5-ingredient alcoholic beverage that mimics the taste Read more...

The Tell-Tale Can

Posted 2:20pm Sunday 22nd May 2022 by Edgar Allen Poon

True! I am a thief, but I am not mad, just an alcoholic with a guilty conscience. I found myself out of piss and fairly sober at a party. Across the table from me lay, apparently unattended, an unopened and immaculate DoBro. So ice cold and refreshing, covered in condensation all along its red Read more...

Asahi Super Dry

Posted 10:12pm Sunday 15th May 2022 by Chug Norris

Asahi Super Dry is a very nice beer. “Asahi”, you say, “Isn’t that the enormous multinational that owns just about anything that you can put your lips around? [insert dick joke here]”. Why yes, yes it is, fictional booze review enjoyer, but that is not to say we Read more...

El Diablos

Posted 2:33pm Sunday 8th May 2022 by Chug Norris

El Diablos are no ordinary beer. They are an ancient artefact of likely Satanic provenance that hails from a time before creation itself. They appear at random times in random locations throughout New Zealand and prey on unsuspecting souls, drawn like moths to a flame by the sinister patterns Read more...