The Sheet Shuffle - 14
Posted 10:30pm Sunday 11th July 2010
This is it. After this column, I will no longer be shuffling your sheets, but shipping my Canadian booty back to the land of beavers and moose. As such, an elegy to travel and sex is in order. Clit rubbing, dick dipping, toe sucking, inner knee licking and back scratching have a completely Read more...
The Sheet Shuffle - 13
Posted 8:35pm Sunday 11th July 2010
A Symphony of Queefs. In my younger years, I had this distinct illusion that sex was a clean, soft, velvety affair of veils, heavy panting, and moans. Little did I expect squishes and other noises. Let’s talk a little about queefs. Queefs are merely the fodder of farcical sex. Queefs are Read more...
The Sheet Shuffle - 12
Posted 4:30pm Sunday 11th July 2010
They Tell Me You Like Sex. There’s this guy. He sent it like three orgies on the fourth of July: sparkles, banners, and whole lot of pheromones. Alfred Kinsey collected thousands of interviews for both Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (1948) and Sexual Behavior in Read more...
The Sheet Shuffle - 11
Posted 3:35pm Sunday 11th July 2010
“I just came so easily from sex I never thought I needed a vibrator” If I were a bar, I’d be in a small dark alley, my bartenders would wear scarves, and I wouldn’t be popular on Tuesdays. If Peaches and Cream (112 St Andrew Street) were a person, it would have blonde hair, show Read more...
The Sheet Shuffle - 10
Posted 2:42pm Sunday 11th July 2010
Libidinous Tendencies and the Essay Wall My creativity and my libido have gone hand in hand: they’ve met the increase in work by starkly plummeting. Thus I’ll engage my gender bias and my whiskey on ice and consider a few topical questions. In answer to Read more...
The Sheet Shuffle - 09
Posted 1:39pm Sunday 11th July 2010
If You Put Your Leg This Way and I Hold Myself Here … Some Sex, Some Positions Last night, after a brilliant pub crawl, as I slid myself between the sheets on the top level of the bunk-bed, I heard my moody lower bunkmate return. With a twittering blonde woman. She gave Read more...