Jan 20 - Feb 18

With exams approaching, you may need to work on your attention span. 

This week’s craving: a whole bag of twisties



Feb 19 - Mar 20

Time to snuggle up, cry and shut yourself out from the world. 

This week’s craving: chocolate



Mar 21 - Apr 19

You aren’t misunderstood, you just have anger issues.

This week’s craving: attention



Apr 20 - May 20

End of sem is near. Time to focus on being your best, balanced self. 

This week’s craving: a humble cup of tea 



May 21 - Jun 20

Sick of peoples shit? They’re also probably sick of yours. 

This week’s craving: leftover pizza crusts 



Jun 21 - July 22

Don’t be shy, let that certain someone know how you truly feel. 

This week’s craving: french fries 



July - Aug 22

Take a nap. It must be exhausting having to think about yourself all the time.

This week’s craving: butter chicken 



Aug 23 - Sep 22

Important decisions ahead, don’t overthink it. 

This week’s craving: a pile of hashbrowns 



Sep 23 - Oct 22

Now is a good time for an ego and STD check. 

This week’s craving: dumplings from The Dumpling Lady



Oct 23 - Nov 21

Things are suspicious at the moment. Take a step back before making rash decisions. 

This week’s craving: charcuterie board 



Nov 22 - Dec 21

Your victim complex is showing. Pack it up. 

This week’s craving: vodka shots and a pity party 



Dec 22 - Jan 19

It’s okay to be nice to people. We’re all human. 

This week’s craving: love and compassion 

This article first appeared in Issue 12, 2021.
Posted 12:49am Monday 24th May 2021 by Critic.