- Wear studded leather, but wear it inside out to keep some mystery.
- Get some knee pads, you'll be spending a lot of time on your knees… praying obviously!
- Remember God's Loophole. If you're not ringing the Devil's doorbell, then he can't hear you. Duh.
- Have lots of sex, like, A LOT. But don't enjoy it; you still want to appear naïve and innocent, don't you? You whore!
- Most dicks are gross, try a lollipop substitute if you still want to show off your sucking prowess.
- You've got to have beautifully manicured nails, but keep them short (you know why).
- Wanna be a whore? You gotta douche. Wanna be a virgin? Use holy water.
- Listen to Britney Spears. I'm not sure how it works, but it works.
- Try some guided meditation. It could open your… chakras.
- If all else fails you could always try lesbianism. Straight guys like it, don’t they?