Debatable - 16

This week’s motion is “that social networking stunts social skills.” Beau Murrah argues the affirmative while Hannah Drury argues the negative.

Affirmative
I have (and you likely have too) heard old people say things about social networking websites that sound like things probably said about telephones when they were new. “Back in my day…” and something about how young people suck. However one old man said something that rang pretty true: It is a pretty shitty replacement for the real deal.
I think he makes the mistake in presuming though, that everyone uses such websites as some sort of replacement for social interaction. To the contrary, Facebook and such websites are an amazing conduit bringing people together for events, and over common interests, whether it’s overthrowing Mubarak or bringing people to your flat on a Thursday night for a party. It is great for connecting people when they otherwise can’t, such as when at work or far away.
My argument is basically this: Social networking websites are beneficial/benign to your social skills in as far as they support or help grow what is in essence already there; face-to-face relationships.   When engaged in-of-themselves however Internet networking websites stunt your social skills. The Internet obsessed basement dweller hasn’t become our generation’s archetypal stalker/creep/lone wolf assassin in movies for nothing I would suggest: they have engaged too deeply into the simulacrum of impersonal interaction.
This argument I think is something that comes across intuitively true to almost everyone. Contrast for example these two common Facebook phenomenons:
a) Facebook helping you get in touch with that girl/guy you met and had a good time with at the party on Saturday (remembering in the social network this pretty much was the genesis of the book of face now worth billions)
b) Facebook giving the opportunity for that chick/guy who barely spoke to you at the party on Saturday the opportunity to add you and start conversations with you about what movies you clicked ‘like on’ and give you compliments on your pictures. Urgh.
Ok so maybe that example is a bit loaded. Still there is burgeoning research that despite being more inter-connected than ever people are actually feeling increasingly socially isolated. At a basic level, social networking sites deprive of you of some of the most basic human interaction that allows you to read moods and body language and react appropriately. These things are all important for social skills.
 
- Beau Murrah
 

Negative
 
There are 2 types of people in this world: people who have social skills, and people who don’t. Social networking sites have no impact on either.
 
Beau has already mentioned the key benefits to social interaction brought about by social networking, so I’m going to focus on what purportedly “stunts” social skills.
 
1. Stalking. Most of us are culpable of having a special person whose facebook page we frequently check. Is this healthy? Perhaps not. But it certainly does not stunt our social skills. Let’s say I am obsessed with a guy called Tom; I spend a concerning amount of time stalking Tom’s page, seeing who he’s related to, what his latest status is and which girls in his facebook pictures could potentially be his girlfriend. Am I a creep? Yes. Has this stunted my social skills? No. Checking out Tom’s page on a regular basis does not make me less inclined to talk to him. On the contrary, it means I can keep up to date with events he is attending, so that I have a greater chance of running into him in real life. If I severely lacked social skills, then maybe I would never have approached Tom in the first place. Facebook isn’t going to change a person’s social skill set; instead, it complements regular interaction for the socially equipped, and it offers a window of hope (all be it, virtual) for the (already) socially stunted.
 
2. Weird people adding you who compliment your pictures and “like” your interests. Such flattery would probably sit well with a socially stunted person. Self-esteem boosts are a wonderful thing. A socially savvy person would probably be creeped out and delete the weirdo as a friend, problem solved. In either case, the socially stunted behaviour that Beau referred to: (not having the guts to talk to a guy/girl at a party) occurred before the social networking. Subsequent facebook comments won’t change anything here. At most, it will give that person another chance to charm that special someone.
 
If you spend all your time in front of a computer screen and no time with actual people, you are going to be socially stunted. Social networking, however, prevents you from doing your homework; it doesn’t prevent you from seeing your friends. Facebook, to this day, remains the sole hope of a Saint Margaret’s girl getting a poke… Cheers Zuckerberg.
 
- Hannah Drury 

 
Posted 3:55am Monday 25th July 2011 by Beau Murrah and Hannah Drury.